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              <text>            5.4                        Lai, Floyd. Interview April 10th, 2023      SC027-49      00:51:43      SC027      California State University San Marcos University Library Special Collections oral history collection                   CSUSM      This oral history was made possible in collaboration with the Cross-Cultural Center and with generous funding from the Instructionally Related Activities fund.      csusm      California State University San Marcos. Cross-Cultural Center      Education, Higher      Human rights      Civil rights      San Marcos (Calif.)      student activism ; advocacy ; intersectionality ; identity      Floyd Lai      Madeleine Meyer      Video      LaiFloyd_MeyerMadeleine_2023-04-11_access.mp4      1:|12(14)|23(3)|42(9)|55(3)|67(18)|80(14)|100(16)|113(8)|124(10)|138(13)|151(17)|166(2)|179(9)|193(5)|208(8)|223(8)|234(15)|248(10)|261(9)|274(2)|287(7)|302(2)|315(5)|330(6)|343(6)|358(2)|372(14)|385(11)|399(4)|415(9)|431(8)|440(17)|452(13)|467(15)|482(5)|499(8)|513(10)|528(8)|543(9)|557(15)|571(6)|587(10)|601(16)|614(16)|632(16)|645(2)|661(9)|676(4)|691(11)|704(6)|717(11)|735(6)|736(1)                  0            https://archivesoralhistories.csusm.edu/files/original/cdc9cc3afd3d45aade44b574d2e95ada.mp4              Other                                        video                                                0          Introduction and Background                                        Interviewer Madeleine Meyer introduces Floyd Lai, who was Director of the Cross-Cultural Center from 2011 to 2023. He talks briefly about his family background and childhood, as well as his identity as a Chinese American. Lai then describes his educational journey and how he originally went to school for environmental engineering. After a lackluster experience, Lai decided to switch career paths after interning at the Cross-Cultural Center at UC Irivine.                                                                                    0                                                                                                                    375          Student Activism and Social Justice                                        Despite not having a specific background in courses related to activism or advocacy, Lai describes how the Cross-Cultural Center and different lived experiences impacted his perception. Self-exploration is defined as a major contributor to his understanding of accepting peoples differences. Lai also discusses how living as an Asian American has impacted his goals for activism and social justice.                                                                                    0                                                                                                                    648          The Earlier CCC                                        Meyer asks Lai to remember the CCC when he first arrived in 2011. Back then, the University Student Union had not yet been built, and several student organizations such as the Black Student Center were not yet founded. Coming from University of California Irvine, with one of the first Cross-Cultural Centers, Lai describes how his previous experiences impacted his work at the CCC. As the center expanded, Lai recalls more and more programs and spaces began ;  including the Activist Lab, Critical Cougars, and others. Through all of these changes, Lai considers the student body to be more transformative. Every year brings new students, new ideas, and new opportunities for growth.                                                                                    0                                                                                                                    1034          The CCC Programs                                        Lai briefly describes a few of the programs that the CCC offered throughout his tenure. Lai also identifies the four specific areas of focus: developing cultural competency, activism, advocacy, and critical engagement across social identity groups. Some of the programs that facilitate these goals include: Critical Cougars: Unlearn, Relarn, the Activist Lab, as well as the expansion of identity-based student organizations such as an APIDA (Asian Pacific Islander Desi American) center at CSUSM.                                                                                    0                                                                                                                    1540          Personal Growth from the CCC                                        Lai considers the role that the CCC has impacted his personal and professional expansion. Beginning with an internship, and later six years of work, at the University of California's Cross-Cultural Center, Lai describes how different programs, roles, and students have impacted him. He attributes his work at the CCC to expanding his understanding of disabilities, for instance.                                                                                     0                                                                                                                    1810          Challenges at the CCC                                        Considering the different challenges in his tenure as Director of the CCC, Lai recalls how the pandemic forces the entire campus to switch online, and how well it was handled. He also discusses the pushback against Critical Race Theory, as well as to different outreach programs. Overall, Lai stresses his goal in educating the next generation, and that challenges have not deterred him.                                                                                    0                                                                                                                    2194          The CCC Coexistence with Student Identity Spaces                                        As more and more student identity-based spaces open, Meyer questions Lai regarding the role of the CCC. Lai addresses that the CCC has continued to coexist with the expansion of other student centers because of its role in providing a space for those students who do not feel represented elsewhere. Currently, with approval of an APIDA center, Lai acknowledges that the role of the CCC will change as its demographics shift, yet the purpose to advocate for activism and inclusivity will remain.                                                                                    0                                                                                                                    2643          The Future of the CCC                                        Lai considers the role of the CCC in the future, in an ideal world. He considers the financial aspects of being a student, and how the CCC could better facilitate student-incomes. Regarding disabled students, he also considers the potential for programs that coexist and yet go beyond those offered with Disabled Student Services (DSS).                                                                                    0                                                                                                                    2895          Some Favorite Memories                                        From his time as Director, Lai recalls some favorite memories. Working with different student graduate assistants are some of his highlights. He specifically enjoyed watching his first-class of graduates, wherein he began working with a freshman class and witnessed their collegiate careers and graduation.                                                                                    0                                                                                                                    Floyd Lai served as Director of the Cross-Cultural Center at California State University from 2011 to 2023. In this Interview, Floyd discusses the growth and development of the CCC in conjunction with other student organizations. As a self-identified Chinese American, Lai addresses how his personal, educational, and professional background have informed one another.                Meyer: My name is Madeleine Meyer and I'm here today in the Kellogg Library interviewing Floyd Lai, director of the Cross-Cultural Center here at California State University San Marcos, (for) the Cross-Cultural Center Oral History Project. The date is Monday, April 10th, 2023, and the time is 4:38(pm). Hi Floyd, could you introduce yourself and talk a little bit about your early life? Where did you grow up, what your parents did for work?  Lai: Hi, Madeleine. Yeah, so my name once again is Floyd Lai. I use he/him pronouns. And I grew up, I was born originally in, on the island of Oahu, in Kahuku, which is on the North Shore. My parents are both immigrants from Taiwan . So, they immigrated in about the early seventies, to Lāʻie. Went to school there, got married, went to school there, and that's where I was born. Eventually moved around and arrived in southern California when I turned six. And I've grown up mostly in an area called Roland Heights up in the Los Angeles, greater Los Angeles area, county area. Um, since then, my parents, being immigrants did a couple of different jobs. When we first started and they first came over, they were helping out with a restaurant here in California. And so that's what partly brought us here to California. And then over time, my father eventually went into, as an entrepreneur went into his own business. And so we have, since I wanna say about the mid-nineties, he um, we have a manufacturing business in zippers . And so, my--it's a family business, although I'm not a part of it, and so (laughs) I'm indirectly involved, but so they manufacture and create zippers for the garment industry in general.  Meyer: Oh, that's really interesting. So what was your educational journey like? I understand that you got your degree in bioengineering from UC (University of California) Irvine, is that correct?  Lai: Almost, almost. It was in environmental engineering.  Meyer: Oh, okay.  Lai: So, yeah, I don't think biomedical or bio was, was quite ready yet. But at Irvine where I went to school, my original, I graduated the degree in environmental engineering. In my junior year I had a(n) internship, which allowed me to go and actually experience what it was like, kind of taking samples of water and you know, doing things. I went and visited government agencies to kind of see a history of what the land looked like prior to the current state, just to see if there were any underwater tanks or anything that would hold anything hazardous. So did that one summer and realized I didn't like it. I didn't see myself doing that for very much longer. And one thing that was different though is that I was heavily involved on campus, and so I was involved in a couple of different student organizations. I interned as a Special Projects Intern at the Cross-Cultural Center. So that was my first introduction to multicultural or cross-cultural centers. And so because of that, it really allowed me to kind of see that I enjoyed working with students and kind of being able to develop programs and being a part of something like that. And it took a mentor of mine, someone I consider a mentor, to tap me on the shoulder and say, “Hey, you'd be really good at this. This is something you might want to consider as a career.” By then I was so far along in my degree that I decided not to change, but rather just complete the degree. And after I graduated college, (I) went into the field of student affairs, which is kind of the work that I do now. And so that's kind of how I got into the pathway of where I am today. My, I decided to work to see if this was kind of the field I wanted to get into. And fortunately, the mentor who I consider someone who kind of guided me on this pathway, left the institution (and) came back, or left southern California, came back and was in a new position and was looking for someone. And so I, that's where I got a job with her, at Alliant International University. It was kind of a jack of all trades ;  I learned a lot of different skills. It was a very small institution. And so I learned, I was the Student Affairs Coordinator, but I did a lot of different things while I was there. And so, that was only gonna be one year. That turned into three, and then I finally decided that I needed to go to grad school, so I ended up getting my graduate or master's degree in post-secondary administration and student affairs at University of Southern California. And so, in that process, about a year into my program, there was an opportunity to go back to my alma mater at UCI (University of California, Irvine) and get a chance to work there as a program coordinator. So I was in my graduate program. There was this opportunity, I wasn't sure how this was gonna work, but I decided to go for it. (I) was hired, and so I essentially was doing a large commute between Irvine, downtown LA, and West LA where I lived. And just kind of making that work for the couple years that I was there. That eventually ended up being my full-time position at the Cross-Cultural Center at UC Irvine. I worked there for about six years, and then as I was looking to see what the next step would be in my progression of my career, an opportunity occurred down here at Cal(ifornia) State San Marcos, in twenty-- about 2011. And so, I was hired in June of 2011 to work here at Cal State San Marcos. I've been here ever since.  Meyer: Mm-hmm. And you're the longest running program director, right?  Lai: I am, yeah. So, we've had, I'm the fifth person that's been in the position as the, at the time, Associate Director of the Cross-Cultural Center. But, I've been the longest serving.  Meyer: Okay.  Lai: And so I'm going on about, (my) 13th year now that it's 2023, so.  Meyer: Okay. Were there any particular instances in your life in which you decided that student activism and social justice was really what you felt passionate about? Was there like any one incident or student you helped or?  Lai: Yeah. I don't know if there was one single instance necessarily. I--again, my degree was in environmental engineering, and so someone who has that sort of degree, their course load or their classes are pretty set. I was double majoring at the time or attempting to double major with a degree in Japanese language and literature. Which didn't happen. But--so there was very little time for me to take, you know, extensive sociology courses, ethnic studies courses. I took one Asian American Studies class. But I think those opportunities, along with the work that I did at the Cross-Cultural Center, really opened my eyes to what might be possible. I wouldn't say that I was passionate about the work in that regard, but I think as a student, I really enjoyed the topics and issues that were being brought up. A lot of it was around self-exploration, better understanding my own identities and how it interacted with some of the experiences that I had. I will say that I think something that was seminal was I um, in about nineteen, mid-nineties, about ninety-five or so, the internet was still kind of in its early infancy. This is when we had to go to chat rooms or go to, go to certain rooms to be able to chat online and talk to one another. And I was still, you know, I was new to the technology, but I had um, was in one of the labs and I received a message indicating, that you know from someone randomly somewhere that, you know, pretty much told me as an Asian American that I was ruining his career, his academic career. And that he wanted to basically kill every effing one of us. You know, I didn't know what, how to react to it at the time. I went to the person in the lab, let them know, realized I wasn't the only person that received that message. Turns out I and a bunch of other folks that happened to be in the lab and also happened to have Asian sounding last names, were the first instance of a hate crime over email at the time at UCI (University of California at Irvine). And so that experience was sort of a culminating experience for me when it came to how one's identity can impact their lived experiences. Right? Up until--not that I was unaware of that before, but I think as an Asian American, the experiences I had weren't necessarily equivalent to maybe, let's say a Black American or, someone who might identify as Latinx. There wasn't even that term back then, right? And so those are the things that I think really opened my eyes.  And so I got more involved, invested in the work that the Cross-Cultural Center did at UCI, and because of that, that allowed me to explore those areas that I probably wouldn't have if I had continued to go into the field of engineering. I take all of the learning I got, the way I think as an engineer and try to apply it in the work I do today. And so definitely it still serves me in a lot of ways. Um, but it was, I would say that experience coupled with the support that I got from the Cross-Cultural Center and the mentorship that I got, and the opportunities I had to work there that allowed me to find this field of student affairs, and specifically multicultural affairs, is the work that I do. And so, that's been kind of the trajectory and the pathway that I've kind of fallen into. And, you know, like with any position, I don't know how long I'll be somewhere, but there's definitely something unique and special that I've experienced here at Cal State San Marcos that is reminiscent of my time as an undergrad at UCI that I think they're very similar in that at that time, Irvine was not as big as it is now. And it felt very--it was, it felt like it was just, it was just coming into its own. And I feel like Irv-- Cal State San Marcos is in a similar way kind of coming into its own as well. And so I think I enjoy those experiences and why working here has been a great opportunity for me to continue to grow and develop as not only my professional career, but also participating in the student life that occurs here on campus.  Meyer: Right. Right. Okay. So oh, you can go ahead and take a drink. Yeah. Did any, could you describe what the Cross-Cultural Center was like when you first came aboard here?  Lai: Yeah so, my understanding and I'm a person who, when I learned real early an adage that I, again, one of my mentors said, you know it, you don't, you're not really sure where you're going until you really understood where you've come from. And so I've taken that to heart in a lot of ways. And so, I worked at UCI for about six years and really understood the history. Coming here I had a very similar, I didn't know fully--it's different. It's a different campus. It's a different population of students that I work with. And so, it took some time to kind of understand sort of the history of what the (CSUSM Cross-Cultural) center is. So, it really appealed to me. We at the time were called Multicultural Programs. There was a Cross-Cultural Center. It was up in what is currently now where the University Advancement Office is located in the Commons Area, kind of up there. And I had two offices, that was kind of the center. And then I was a part of the Student Life and Leadership (SLL), which is now has also evolved in, it has a different name now on campus: Student Leadership and Involvement Center now. But back then it was SLL. And I was hired on as the Associate Director of Multicultural Programs. And so what that meant is that I was a part of Student Life, or at that time, Student Life and Leadership. And I oversaw the Cross-Cultural Center, but it was also integrated into much of the other programs, which included orientation at the time, student, student organizations, fraternity and sorority life. It was all encompassed in that department. So, I had colleagues that had a specific area. And then my area was in Multicultural Programs, or the Cross-Cultural Center. We were a small office (laughs). My desk was literally in the middle of everything. No walls, you know, I was just there and everything kind of happened . There was comfortable couches and things but it was, you know, it was busy. It could be loud at times. And so, I had to either kind of zone it out so I could focus on the work, or really develop relationships with the folks and the students that were there. It was, it felt you know, we were still kind of growing in a lot of ways. And so, I used the first couple years to really understand, or at least try to understand where the Cross-Cultural Center at Cal State San Marcos, what its history had been, what its legacy was at the time, and what it could be, and really understanding that. Um, and so that's kind of the first kind of impression I got.  I know I did a lot of walking back and forth between my quote unquote office or upstairs. So about, probably about two days or three days after my first day, which was June 11th, I remember that 2011, or maybe it was (June) 13, whatever that Monday was, Dilcie Perez, who was my supervisor at the time, took me to a meeting to talk about the development and construction of the new University Student Union (building on CSUSM campus that houses student organizations) at the time. So, I got a chance to see kind of what was gonna happen within the next couple of years. And sure enough, soon as, you know, this Union the Union was built, we had a much larger space. We--at the time, there were still only the three centers. So, it was the Cross-Cultural Center at the time, (another center) known as the Women's Equity Center, or the Women's Center, I should say. It was before it was called the--what it's current name is (Women and Gender Equity Center), and then the LGBTQIA Pride Center. So it was just those three spaces and so we each had a space, and really it was a lot more square footage, a lot more opportunities to kind of do programs and do different things in those spaces. So, I've seen kind of an, an evolution of how space has affected and been an integral part of what the students experience. Right? And so, they had now a larger space they could call their home and be able to participate in the programming that we did.  Meyer: Nice. So, obviously a lot has changed in the years since you have been Director of the Cross-Cultural Center. What do you think some of the biggest transformations are? I mean, obviously the space transformed.  Lai: Yeah. I think, you know, students are different, right? I think every year there's a new crop of students that come in, comes in, and so their--the demographic, their experiences are very different. The last couple years with COVID in particular. So there, so I think of, you know the students we have are part of the differences in trying to ensure that we're fulfilling our mission and supporting the students that come in, whatever experiences they have at the time. So, that I think has evolved and shifted and changed. I would say the issues too, I think back when I started, not that it wasn't an issue, but I think questions about diversity, equity and inclusion, weren't as divisive as they feel like right now to some degree. And the ability to have a difference of opinion, or even be diverse for lack of a better word, it seemed like there was less of that animosity or even a question of whether that's even integral or important, than there is now. And so that's been a shift or change that I've seen. Besides obviously the space. I think the mission has shifted and evolved and changed. So as I've gotten a better sense of, one, honoring and understanding what the history of the Cross-Cultural Center was here at Cal State San Marcos. You know, after a couple years, I wanted to put my own sort of spin and, or impact it in a way that I thought would benefit the students that were here at the time. And so, the mission, not that it's evolved, it's kind of--well no--it has evolved in a way that I think is trying to be more --trying to meet the needs of the students that we have currently. So those are some of the things: the programs, the way it's organized as well, programmatically, so that it aligns with our mission. We're trying to be more strategic about that as well. And so those have been some of the things that I think I've seen kind of shift and change, as well as I think just the, just the natural budget cycles, politics and other things that occur on a college campus.  Meyer: Can you talk a little bit about the programs that you guys have?  Lai: Yeah, yeah. Our current iteration now, we have, our focus is in four specific areas which include: developing cultural competency, activism and advocacy, critical engagement across social identity groups. So, we come from an intersectional lens. And so, recognizing that there is, there are ways that different people and different identities can interact and have unique outcomes. And so how do we explore that a little bit? And then the retention of underrepresented students in ensuring that they stay here and are successful. We have a high number of students who are first generation college students. And so recognizing that there is additional support that's needed. So those are the four sort of main pillars, for lack of a better word, that we have in the Cross-Cultural Center that really round us in the work that we do in the mission of the center. The programs we put on mirror that. So, we have program series, that we kind of--as a guide for our students. When I first came on, I think--and I think with anything we want, I was still learning, and so the students had some set programs that they put on, and you know, it would change and evolve depending on what the student's interests were. And so, it felt like it was not something con-- there was always an underlying thread, but there was not something that felt like it was consistent. And so, probably about five or six years ago, we instituted more of a program series that aligned with the themes that I shared earlier. And so, some of them are direct correlations. So, for example the Activist Lab, that meets our theme of advocacy and activism, it's an exploration of different ways in which students or participants can see who, what activists, who they were, what were their causes, how did they approach creating social change. Protest is absolutely an integral part of it, but it's not the only way that I think, um, students oftentimes think may be the only way. And so really helping to explore the different avenues of creating social changes is what we do within the Activist Lab.  The other one we do as far as retention is called Academe &amp;amp ;  Me, it used to be called Tukwut Talks: Conversations with Faculty. But it was really about how to create programs that allow students to develop relationships with faculty members, recognizing that they were students themselves at one point, had highs and lows. And you know, and really humanize, I think for lack of a better word, because I think students oftentimes, either if they don't have a question or unsure about having a conversation with their faculty member, they don't. They--what do we talk about kind of a thing, right? And so they often put 'em on this sort of pedestal. And so inviting faculty--and even now we have grad students come in and participate--but let them know that it's okay that they have, they're just like anyone else. Maybe even learning about a particular subject of study that perhaps they didn't even know was something they could study. So that particular--Academe &amp;amp ;  Me is really about helping to hopefully create a pipeline of students to go into the professorate or into academia. Again, developing relationships with them and so, that's part of how we hopefully can retain our students. One final thing that we do, well two others I'll speak to. One is Critical Cougars: Unlearn. Relearn. And so that really aligns with the notion of how do we explore those different identities? And in the critical engagements and this around across social identity groups. It's kind of our largest sort of bucket, ‘cause anything can be sort of put in that particular bucket, but it's really about how do we unlearn maybe things that we learned in high school, how do we relearn or even learn for the first time things that we weren't taught necessarily, depending on where we went. And how do we evolve and continue to change and challenge ourselves critically in the thinking that we have. And so that's what that sort of program does.  And then finally, I'll speak to something--my identity is, and I didn't, I spoke part of it a little bit earlier when I introduced myself, but my parents are from Taiwan, so I identify as Asian American, specifically Chinese American. And so, currently at Cal State San Marcos, there isn't a physical building, or a center dedicated to Asian Pacific Islander Desi American students. So with that vacuum, I said you know, the Cross-Cultural Center and oftentimes a Multicultural Center has served in that sort of capacity ;  where the space is there but the other, like the LGBTQIA or the Women's Center, this Cross-Cultural Center in other, not necessarily here but in other spaces, they've been--they came from that space. And then once they had a critical mass or felt the need, they were established. So in the same vein, we don't have one currently. So because of that, and partly because of my own identity as that, we have a program called Defining Diaspora: Asian Pacific Islander Desi American Identities. Which essentially is just an exploration of that really large group of individuals and identities that fall under that sort of diaspora. And so, a lot of programming is, can be about a specific individual, a particular culture, a particular practice or tradition in those areas. And so that's kind of what Defining Diaspora is meant to do, is to really help to expose students of those identities, or those that aren't and wanting to learn more about to those types of cultures and traditions that are part of that.  So those are kind of the programs we do. Underlying all that is really a focus on social justice work. And so, things that my predecessors started, my immediate predecessor, Sarah (Sheikh) started was the Social Justice Summit, which is kind of a three-day, two-night retreat. Which really allows a small group of about forty students the opportunity to explore their personal identities, better understand what social justice, that term, ‘cause I think we throw it out a lot of times. We want, you know environmental justice, this kind of justice. And so, what does it really mean when we talk about social justice? Having an understanding of the dynamics of either oppression or privilege, and really exploring what those concepts are. And then, we hope, and it's you know it's not always perfect, but it's that third day is then a focus as we return or plan or prepare ourselves to come back to campus. How do we become allies or co-conspirators, or how can we better support those communities or identities we may not necessarily have ourselves? And so, that has been something that's gone on for a while, again that predated me, and we've just kind of expanded and grown that. So, now we have in addition to the summit, which has been on hiatus because of COVID but we hope to bring it back this fall, the Symposium which is kind of more of a conference style. And that sprang out of an understanding that even, again, I'm a big proponent of tradition or just what legacies have been left behind. There were you know, faculty and stu-- staff that really wanted to take an opportunity for the campus to explore what social justice means in a conference sort of setting. So whether it's workshops, presentations. So that kind of has evolved into our Social Justice Symposium. And then when COVID hit, we couldn't do either one of those. And so we, my GA, graduate assistant at the time Daniela (Carreon) we, in discussions, we wanted to start a scholars program. And so, it's kind of a little bit of the summit. It's not the overnight, because it's kind of a class setting or curriculum. It's over the course of a couple weeks. Similarly, not a very big class, but very intimate for folks who want to be able to learn about these things and be scholars. And so the hope is that they're all connected in some way. Scholars can help in presenting at Symposium, Scholars can also be some of the mentors at the Summit and retreat. And so that's another area that we focus on in the Cross-Cultural Center, in collaboration now with the other centers, Student Life Centers that exist here on campus.  Meyer: In what ways do you think, has your involvement with the Cross-Cultural Center helped you expand and develop as a person and as a professional? I know you've touched a little bit (overlapping dialogue) but-  Lai: Yeah. Yeah. No, you know, the work I do, I would say absolutely students are at the heart of the work that we do. And so, as students have evolved and changed in their challenges and their perspectives have evolved, I in similar fashion, I think have learned from that as well. And so--it's not, I say this to students all the time: it's not about saying, “Oh I took this workshop. Check, I'm done with diversity, or I'm done with this topic.” It's an ongoing, you know, lifelong pursuit of recognizing and interacting with people that are maybe different from you. And everyone's gonna have a unique perspective or a unique--I mean there are similar, you know places or, you know people connect to. But everyone's different. And for that reason, I think I've evolved and developed a more nuanced approach in how to not only have the conversation around , um, diversity, equity, inclusion, even topics of social justice. I view my role oftentimes as the Director (of the Cross-Cultural Center) in how do we invite people to have those conversations? Even if they're difficult, even if they're challenging, even if they're divisive. Which I know is so hard to do, because why would I wanna sit across the table from someone who absolutely does not believe I should exist or doesn't agree in a lot of different ways. But I think it's through that process, that I've been able to kind of learn and grow as well on either approaches or ways in which we can kind of bring people to the table to have these types of conversations. It is my belief that I think, and I take that to heart because it's my own experience as I've better understood you know, the various isms, prejudices, biases and whatnot that I am a better person for it. And I'm more aware of situations and things that can be changed to enable folks to feel like they're included as part of that experience, whatever it may necessarily be.  So, you know my father is an immigrant as part of his identity. He was also, he was born in 1940, and so he was prior to the polio vaccine. So, he has a disability in the sense that he at the time had a brace, and now it, now he's in a wheelchair. But that allowed me to recognize, I mean, we got so many stairs here at Cal State San Marcos, sometimes it's hard to know where people have accessibility and things like that. But so that's something I you know, I grew up with and I recognized, so I thought, “Oh yeah, I know about disabilities. I get it.” And then more recently at a conference I attended, and this is COVID was still happening, we had the stickers that said, “Hey, if it's green, we can hug each other. If it's yellow, you know, maybe like elbows or whatever. And if it's red, no, I want to stay six feet away,” kind of thing. And so, I was part of a registration group, and I share this in the workshops that I do with students, but I said, “Okay, great. We're done, right? We just gotta do the stickers.” And a colleague of mine said, “Well, wait, what if they're colorblind? How would they know which color to pick?” Never occurred to me, because I'm not colorblind. So, we eventually found a solution. We wrote down, you know, R, Y, and G, so folks could at least see what was written there, regardless of the color.  But it's those things, those interactions. And I realized that, you know, it's not until you're either confronted with something or maybe you say something you (laughs) you know, you probably shouldn't have said that you realize or better understand sort of the experience. And so, my hope in the work that I do with the Cross-Cultural Center and the experiences that I've gained, I've learned every, every time I've had an interaction, how I can better hopefully have a future interaction or things that I need to work on myself a little bit more in recognizing. And so it's an iterative process. And so, I think that's been something that I've been able to take away because of the fact that I work in a space like this. Versus a corporate you know, entity or things like that. But because of this, it gives me a really unique perspective on how our society functions and what things we can do to try and really be as inclusive as possible for all.  Meyer: So as your time in your role as director, what are the greatest challenges that you believe the center has faced? I know the pandemic probably threw a wrench in everything.  Lai: Yeah. Yeah. I think that's a big one, right? I think having to pivot within a couple weeks, I think the university did an amazing job. You know--it's hindsight now knowing some of the impacts. But I think in the moment, having to do that, definitely that was one challenge, right? In having to deal now, I think with students who have to relearn what it's like to be in college, ‘cause they really didn't really get that experience or relearn what it means to learn even. Because I think those expectations have shifted and changed. I would say also in my time here, I mentioned a little bit earlier, there is I think more of a--I wouldn't even call it a critical view of, but critical in the sense of like something that is a critique. Less--It's very critical. I think a lot of folks are questioning things now related to--let me think. Oh, I'm trying to, it's blank. It's not coming to my mind right now, but just even the necessity for diversity, equity, and inclusion there are-- Oh, critical race theories, CRT, that's one. Which I think has somehow--education has always been I think viewed in ways, understandably, because tax-- Public education, I'll speak to because tax dollars go into it, and so how can we be most sufficient and effective and so forth. And I get that. But even, you know, things like affirmative action which is, we don't have in California, but even those concepts and ideas of how do we outreach to underserved or underrepresented populations. Those things that I think were differences of opinion or approach with regard to policy has taken a very dark turn in the sense that it's very personal in a lot of ways. And I know and I'm not--I again, I was an engineer(ing major), so I didn't take any sociology or gender equity studies classes. But I think it may be second wave feminism but this, the personal is political, is a truism that I think is in a lot of ways where a lot of the policies and things that are being done are directly targeting certain groups. And so the challenge for me, and I've wondered this as well because I've seen states now, right? And their legislatures look at different ways and approaches, such that for example with regard to students that may go to university in Florida, are getting a very different experience when it comes to interacting or working (with) others. Partly because of what they can't necessarily discuss or talk about. I have colleagues, and I'm sure I think I heard from others that Offices of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion had to rename themselves because they were illegal now to be in some of those spaces.  So I've seen that shift in the sense that I think I'm gonna be, I--my goal as an educator is to really help the up-and-coming generational students think differently or to be prepared for the work that they do. Now, it's gonna be compounded by the fact that based on your geography or location or where you go to school, you're gonna have a very different experience of things that you've been able to experience as a student. We often say that going to college is kind of a mini version of real life, but here you can make mistakes and the consequences aren't necessarily like, you know, a lot of times we try to find the developmental approach within Student Affairs. How do we do this differently? How do we, you know, it's meant to be a growing opportunity that oftentimes you don't get when you're out in quote unquote the real world. Things just kind of happen and you--that the consequences are what they are. So, my fear is that oftentimes now, if my goal is to have students be able to understand and interact with someone who has no idea or hasn't necessarily had these same experiences or similar types of experiences, doesn't have to be the same--what's that gonna mean then for our society as a whole? Right? Because again, depending on your geography or where you go to school, you're in a very different kind of educational experience compared to someone else who does. I think that where information comes from, there are some benefits with social media and other things where it has democratized and allowed multiple--even filming things, catching things that, police brutality and things like that. So a very democratized, but now the source of where things are and having some level of information literacy and recognizing where it's (media) coming from it, what's the purpose of what it is, and where's the quote unquote truth and where do you suss it out, is another challenge I think that I'm seeing as well in the work that we do. And trying to, we used to start with the same set of facts, and now the question is, “Are we still in, are we talking about the same set of facts or not?” (laughs) And so there's again, some of that that I think sort of needs to happen. And so I see that play out in the work that we do because, you know I may start with like, “Hey, so this has been the experience,” and someone might say, “No, that's not.” And so then I want to learn more about where that is. But it's not necessarily always productive, I guess. And so that's where I see some of the of the challenges in the work that we're doing with these types of spaces, Cross-Cultural Centers or Multicultural Centers.  Meyer: It's the politicization of something that shouldn't be. Yeah.  Lai: Yeah. In a lot of ways. I mean, I could say this, you know, this notion of public health and how politicized even with regard to COVID, right? The notion of--and some of this is cultural you know it's natural for me to think in terms of the collective, because that's you know in Asian cultures broadly speaking there's a collectivist sort of mentality in how that's supported. America has a very individualistic streak, which is you know it's not a bad thing. I think where the challenge comes in is where does one's, where is one's freedom impinged upon and where it's not? And that's been debated for a long time with free speech and lots of other things, but it has been politicized even in areas like public health to a lot of degrees. And so that's, yeah. So those, they're not new challenges per se, but there are new approaches to how do we have these types of conversations, or how do we help educate and teach about these things in a way that hopefully is broadening and enlightening. So.  Meyer: So what role do you see the Cross-Cultural Center playing as it coexist with the expansion of identity specific spaces like the Black Student Center and the Latin</text>
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              <text>/x Center?  Lai: Yeah, that's a great question and one that I wrestle with because I don't know if I necessarily have an answer myself. You know, I started at the Cross-Cultural Center at UC (University of California) Irvine which is one of the first centers, and this is the history that was drilled into me. Second only at the time at the UC system to a University of Washington, at a time when I think resources were scarce. And so, it made sense to start from a collective cross-cultural sort of center and space. And I would say even for, depending on where whatever campus you're on, either resources were tied or made sense that collectively these were cross-cultural or multicultural spaces. They weren't enough, you know. We have students, understandably within the Black communities, BIPOC, so Black, Indigenous, People of Color communities who said, you know, “Okay, this is a good start, but it's not meeting the needs that we have.” And so that's why these spaces then, you know , like a Black Student Center or other spaces have kind of evolved. The question then becomes: well where does then, once these things have evolved and come out of necessarily this space, what then becomes the role of this space where it started and how does it evolve and change? And that's what I've been wrestling with myself because--and I'm not the only one. University, UCSD, San Diego, they started with the Cross-Cultural Center and now they've got a Black Student Center, Indigenous Center, and all these other additional spaces. And so, it's been trying to figure out, besides programmatically, besides the history months or the heritage months, what are the ways in which they can interact one with another? And so, it's gonna be different on each campus. But I think the conclusion for me has been, you know, the Cross-Cultural Center is essential, especially if there's a belief and understanding, which a lot of my colleagues have, about the notion of intersectionality. We're more than just one-dimensional pieces. I'm, you know, I'm Chinese, but I'm also American. Identify as a cisgendered male. All of those things play with one another in the experiences that I have and/or the choices and decisions that I make. And in the same vein I think, there's always gonna be a place for a cross-cultural center or multicultural center, because these unique and specific spaces are serving a purpose. They're helping Black students getting the support they need because they either, whether it's cultural validation, whether it's just being with someone who doesn't question (laughs) why you're there. Or isn't peppering you with questions about something they may not be familiar with, which, you know, naturally happens. “Oh, what about this? Why do you eat this food? What's that?” You know, those types of things. And I think in most situations it'd be great, but there is an instance where I think there's fatigue in having to explain yourself all the time or, and so sometimes it's nice to just be, when you go into a space. Which I can see there's why there are certain spaces, whether it's the Latin</text>
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              <text>/x Center and so forth. So, I think some of it depends on the landscape of the campus of where a particular space may be at. Here, on our campus, for a long, long time, we just had the Cross-Cultural Center, which is the first one, and it wasn't necessarily born out of protest. Students didn't demand it, it was just, as I understand the history, administrators had said, “You know, we want to be prepared for the 21st century student here in North County.” And so, we think this is important. So we, you know, create this space. Soon thereafter, I want to say it was the Pride Center, and then, or maybe the other way around, the Women's Center and then a Pride Center that, you know, were under student government, ASI, at the time. So those were the three centers for a long time.  And then, you know Latinx students said, “We need a space. We're over fifty percent of the population, where our needs are not being met.” You know, and I for a long time, and I and because this is (laughs), I think I had a hard time sort of separating myself and not viewing it as a failure on my part, you know. And students would say, “Oh, it's not you, it's not you. We just need this space.” And I couldn't quite understand, “Well, I know you're saying it's not me, but what could I do to help support this population that we're not doing now?” And so, that was what was going on in my mind. And it took me a couple of well, it took a co--one person in particular and other colleagues to say, “You know, don't get caught up in that.” And eventually I was okay, right? Like, it makes sense that there are more of these spaces because that just provides additional support and resources for these communities. So, that should not be the issue, and you shouldn't get caught up in that. But, you know, it's hard and it--your pride takes a little bit of a hit when you're like: well, what am I not doing that is, that you need a separate space to occur? You know, in that same vein, and eventually there'll be most likely well, I know that the President (of CSUSM, Ellen Neufeldt) has agreed to an Asian Pacific Islander (and Desi American ;  APIDA) space here at Cal State San Marcos. And so, the programming that you know, is near and dear to me, doesn't mean I can't do it but, you know, instead of redundant programs, it'll probably go to a future APIDA center. And so, it's figuring out, I think what that role is.  And I wish I could say I had a great answer, but I do--I think what I've resolved myself to, or resigned myself to understand--that's probably not the way right way to say it, but is that there will always, I think, be a place for a Cross-Cultural Center or Multicultural Center space. What we do in that is gonna vary. And I've had to adjust. So that's the themes that I shared earlier. And the purpose of, in our mission and how we kind of structure what we do is intentional because it avoids or tries not to step on sort of the toes of the other centers and spaces, right? They have their own things that they do and they support the students. We all have different lenses through which we try to do the same work. And so, my role I think, as a Cross-Cultural Center is how do we build community? How do we bring these spaces together? And being more of a connector is something I've kind of started to better understand as far as what I think this, the role of future cross-cultural center or multicultural center spaces that maybe dealing with this might be is, is how do we connect these communities and keep them together in some way. And continue to find those gaps, those spaces where students may not-- An example is what if I'm multicultural or multiracial? I don't feel like I belong in the Black Student Center, or I don't feel like I belong in the Latin</text>
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              <text>/x Center if I'm both Black and Mexican. And so, I think that's where a space like the Cross-Cultural Center or a multicultural center could still serve as a purpose in exploring those identities, helping them to navigate the complexities of what that entails ;  as well as their gender, sexual orientation, all of that in helping them to decide that. So, I think that's what I've come to understand. But the--you know, the verdict's still out on what the (laughs) what that is, and our students keep changing. So, you know, there could be other things that we need to address and figure out as we move further along. But my hope ultimately is that whatever it is, that it'll still continue to serve the needs of the students that are coming to our university and to the institutions that they are applying to.  Meyer: What direction do you think the CCC should grow in from here?  Lai: Yeah. If I had my (laughs)--  Meyer: If you had your, if you had your dreams.  Lai: Of course. You know I think I would love to, and we're kind of moving in this direction, I would love to figure out better ways to support students financially. Whether it's through scholarships or other things. We are as part of I think this project as well, we're celebrating our 20th anniversary. Which you know, we're still pretty young. We're still kind of just getting out of our teen years, right? Into our twenties. But it's a great milestone I think, with regard to being here on this campus. And so, I think financially looking at ways in which we can support our students. I would love to expand our staff as well. I think-- t's funny, I've been the longest serving director, but I've also been a staff of one. And so, in some ways I wonder if I've, if I'd been successful, if there would've been more, other staff members a part of it. But I would love to see more staff members, because I think there just isn't you know-- students' needs are getting more and more complex that require more time, and there's only one of me and I'd like to see other staff come in and be able to assist the students that are here, that may need that support. I think there are other areas that we can explore as well when it comes to, you know, we have a Disability Student Services, but their focus really is on providing the support for students to be successful. Not necessarily doing programming to help folks understand what those (services) are and how we can make the--make some changes or differences. People that are neurodivergent, there's just a lot of different areas and identities that haven't necessarily been explored. But I think those would be opportunities for a Cross-Cultural Center to kind of be able to provide space or to provide programming that can help other students understand not necessarily what it's like, but better understand those conditions and/or maybe consider different ways of thinking about how they, when they have the opportunity or are placed in a position where they can make a difference, that they're hopefully considering and thinking about those areas that they themselves perhaps are privileged in. Where they don't have to worry about or they don't have to think about it in any way.  And so that level of work, I think in programming and approaching and supporting those communities, I think is other areas where we can see the Cross-Cultural Center sort of grow. I think there's the conversation about the divisiveness in politics in other ways that, you know, a big part of what I'm doing now and hopefully will continue to do, has been working with the Civility Campaign (program by the CSUSM Dean of Students) on our campus. They kind of, when I first started here at Cal State San Marcos, the, at the time, this campaign started around the same time, so I've been connected to it for a long time. But I've seen the significance and importance of how do we have dialogue and conversation--particularly with someone who may just be of a completely different belief system--but hopefully still get nuggets of wisdom or at least try to understand one another. A lot of, I don't want to make or simplify to say if we just saw you know, held hands kumbaya, that it was gonna be that easy. I don't think it's that easy, but I think that is the work that is necessary for students, particularly at a time when perhaps they've come from very homogeneous communities or they just have never been introduced to someone. To be able to find ways in which those kinds of opportunities can help them to grow and be eventually a better graduate of Cal State San Marcos, because they've had experiences or programs that have introduced them to these types of things that they haven't necessarily done before. So, I think long-term those are some things I'm hoping that the Cross-Cultural Center can play an active role in supporting or perhaps being a big part of really proactively engaging our students in a way that again, makes those students that graduate from Cal State San Marcos really the premier students here in North County. And who go on to become leaders and folks that are making these decisions in the community.  Meyer: I'm sure you have a lot, but could you share a few of your favorite memories from your time at the Cross-Cultural Center?  Lai: Yeah. You know, it's hard to think about. I mean, there's so many different ones. I think I value the different student leaders that have worked with me. From the very first time, when we called them peer educators at the time. Because I'm a staff of one, I rely heavily on my student staff to really help in getting a lot of the work and the mission of the center done. And so, some of my fondest memories are those different folks that have worked alongside me. Getting to know them, getting to hear about their experiences here on campus. Now seeing them graduate as alumni and really kind of, you know, off in the world and kind of doing some amazing things. I, in Higher Ed you know, I recall after my fifth year that was the first year that I had a student that I knew was a freshman or a first-year student that I saw all the way through and graduate. You know, I've had other students that graduated along the way, but the--that was the first group that I knew from the first time they stepped foot into campus all the way through till they graduated, even transfer students as well. And so, that's one I think fond memory. I love the staff that, I love the staff that I work with now, but also even before when I was part of Student Life and Leadership, Dilcie Perez (formerly in charge of Student Life and Leadership) was my supervisor. And I think she instilled a lot of laughter and like just fun stuff in the work that was oftentimes can be hard and challenging. And so, those are some fond memories. We have a unique tradition here at Cal State San Marcos around Halloween, where a lot of folks dress up, in--within Student Affairs I should say. (laughs) But it's a big deal, and I don't think I fully realized it until I first came to this campus and experienced it for the first time. But some of the different traditions and things like that have been fun and interesting to see.  I--commencement is always a fun time where a lot of the memories that I have that I can recollect. When I have had the chance, a lot of us volunteer and help support the program. So, being able to see them (students) cross the stage, see their families and watch them witness their students cross the stage. And again, a lot of them are first generation, first in their families (to graduate college) and the joy and the excitement that they see, those are some memories that I'll definitely keep for a long time. Because I think that is what grounds me. And I know a lot of my colleagues say this, but commencement is kind of, it--the students, yes. But also seeing them achieve and be able to get to that point. And the excitement is also refreshing and kind of a reminder of the work and why we do it. So, when we deal with policy issues or just challenges with bureaucracy of the university, it's always nice to remember those moments because then it reminds at least me of what and why I do the work that I do, and why it's so critical and important. Or at least I would like to think that it's a big part of their experience that they have here at Cal State San Marcos.  Meyer: Well, thank you so much, Floyd. You've been a pleasure to interview and yeah, thank you so much.  Lai: Thank you. Thanks for taking the time.  Meyer: All right. That was great.  (laughs).             https://rightsstatements.org/page/InC/1.0/?language=en       video      Property rights reside with the university. Copyrights are retained by the creators of the records and their heirs.  This resource is licensed for noncommercial educational use using CC NC-BY 4.0. Please contact Special Collections at archives</text>
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                <text>Floyd Lai served as Director of the Cross-Cultural Center at California State University from 2011 to 2023. In this Interview, Floyd discusses the growth and development of the CCC in conjunction with other student organizations. As a self-identified Chinese American, Lai addresses how his personal, educational, and professional background have informed one another. </text>
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                    <text>FLOYD LAI

TRANSCRIPT, INTERVIEW
2023-04-10

Meyer: My name is Madeleine Meyer and I'm here today in the Kellogg Library interviewing Floyd Lai,
director of the Cross-Cultural Center here at California State University San Marcos, (for) the CrossCultural Center Oral History Project. The date is Monday, April 10th, 2023, and the time is 4:38(pm). Hi
Floyd, could you introduce yourself and talk a little bit about your early life? Where did you grow up,
what your parents did for work?
Lai: Hi, Madeleine. Yeah, so my name once again is Floyd Lai. I use he/him pronouns. And I grew up, I
was born originally in, on the island of Oahu, in Kahuku, which is on the North Shore. My parents are
both immigrants from Taiwan. So, they immigrated in about the early seventies, to Lāʻie. Went to school
there, got married, went to school there, and that's where I was born. Eventually moved around and
arrived in southern California when I turned six. And I've grown up mostly in an area called Roland
Heights up in the Los Angeles, greater Los Angeles area, county area. Um, since then, my parents, being
immigrants did a couple of different jobs. When we first started and they first came over, they were
helping out with a restaurant here in California. And so that's what partly brought us here to California.
And then over time, my father eventually went into, as an entrepreneur went into his own business. And
so we have, since I wanna say about the mid-nineties, he um, we have a manufacturing business in
zippers. And so, my--it's a family business, although I'm not a part of it, and so (laughs) I'm indirectly
involved, but so they manufacture and create zippers for the garment industry in general.
Meyer: Oh, that's really interesting. So what was your educational journey like? I understand that you
got your degree in bioengineering from UC (University of California) Irvine, is that correct?
Lai: Almost, almost. It was in environmental engineering.
Meyer: Oh, okay.
Lai: So, yeah, I don't think biomedical or bio was, was quite ready yet. But at Irvine where I went to
school, my original, I graduated the degree in environmental engineering. In my junior year I had a(n)
internship, which allowed me to go and actually experience what it was like, kind of taking samples of
water and you know, doing things. I went and visited government agencies to kind of see a history of
what the land looked like prior to the current state, just to see if there were any underwater tanks or
anything that would hold anything hazardous. So did that one summer and realized I didn't like it. I
didn't see myself doing that for very much longer. And one thing that was different though is that I was
heavily involved on campus, and so I was involved in a couple of different student organizations. I
interned as a Special Projects Intern at the Cross-Cultural Center. So that was my first introduction to
multicultural or cross-cultural centers. And so because of that, it really allowed me to kind of see that I
enjoyed working with students and kind of being able to develop programs and being a part of
something like that. And it took a mentor of mine, someone I consider a mentor, to tap me on the
shoulder and say, “Hey, you'd be really good at this. This is something you might want to consider as a
career.” By then I was so far along in my degree that I decided not to change, but rather just complete
the degree. And after I graduated college, (I) went into the field of student affairs, which is kind of the
work that I do now. And so that's kind of how I got into the pathway of where I am today. My, I decided
to work to see if this was kind of the field I wanted to get into. And fortunately, the mentor who I
consider someone who kind of guided me on this pathway, left the institution (and) came back, or left
southern California, came back and was in a new position and was looking for someone. And so I, that's
where I got a job with her, at Alliant International University. It was kind of a jack of all trades; I learned
a lot of different skills. It was a very small institution. And so I learned, I was the Student Affairs

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Coordinator, but I did a lot of different things while I was there. And so, that was only gonna be one
year. That turned into three, and then I finally decided that I needed to go to grad school, so I ended up
getting my graduate or master's degree in post-secondary administration and student affairs at
University of Southern California. And so, in that process, about a year into my program, there was an
opportunity to go back to my alma mater at UCI (University of California, Irvine) and get a chance to
work there as a program coordinator. So I was in my graduate program. There was this opportunity, I
wasn't sure how this was gonna work, but I decided to go for it. (I) was hired, and so I essentially was
doing a large commute between Irvine, downtown LA, and West LA where I lived. And just kind of
making that work for the couple years that I was there. That eventually ended up being my full-time
position at the Cross-Cultural Center at UC Irvine. I worked there for about six years, and then as I was
looking to see what the next step would be in my progression of my career, an opportunity occurred
down here at Cal(ifornia) State San Marcos, in twenty-- about 2011. And so, I was hired in June of 2011
to work here at Cal State San Marcos. I've been here ever since.
Meyer: Mm-hmm. And you're the longest running program director, right?
Lai: I am, yeah. So, we've had, I'm the fifth person that's been in the position as the, at the time,
Associate Director of the Cross-Cultural Center. But, I've been the longest serving.
Meyer: Okay.
Lai: And so I'm going on about, (my) 13th year now that it's 2023, so.
Meyer: Okay. Were there any particular instances in your life in which you decided that student activism
and social justice was really what you felt passionate about? Was there like any one incident or student
you helped or?
Lai: Yeah. I don't know if there was one single instance necessarily. I--again, my degree was in
environmental engineering, and so someone who has that sort of degree, their course load or their
classes are pretty set. I was double majoring at the time or attempting to double major with a degree in
Japanese language and literature. Which didn't happen. But--so there was very little time for me to take,
you know, extensive sociology courses, ethnic studies courses. I took one Asian American Studies class.
But I think those opportunities, along with the work that I did at the Cross-Cultural Center, really opened
my eyes to what might be possible. I wouldn't say that I was passionate about the work in that regard,
but I think as a student, I really enjoyed the topics and issues that were being brought up. A lot of it was
around self-exploration, better understanding my own identities and how it interacted with some of the
experiences that I had. I will say that I think something that was seminal was I um, in about nineteen,
mid-nineties, about ninety-five or so, the internet was still kind of in its early infancy. This is when we
had to go to chat rooms or go to, go to certain rooms to be able to chat online and talk to one another.
And I was still, you know, I was new to the technology, but I had um, was in one of the labs and I
received a message indicating, that you know from someone randomly somewhere that, you know,
pretty much told me as an Asian American that I was ruining his career, his academic career. And that he
wanted to basically kill every effing one of us. You know, I didn't know what, how to react to it at the
time. I went to the person in the lab, let them know, realized I wasn't the only person that received that
message. Turns out I and a bunch of other folks that happened to be in the lab and also happened to
have Asian sounding last names, were the first instance of a hate crime over email at the time at UCI
(University of California at Irvine). And so that experience was sort of a culminating experience for me

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when it came to how one's identity can impact their lived experiences. Right? Up until--not that I was
unaware of that before, but I think as an Asian American, the experiences I had weren't necessarily
equivalent to maybe, let's say a Black American or, someone who might identify as Latinx. There wasn't
even that term back then, right? And so those are the things that I think really opened my eyes.
And so I got more involved, invested in the work that the Cross-Cultural Center did at UCI, and because
of that, that allowed me to explore those areas that I probably wouldn't have if I had continued to go
into the field of engineering. I take all of the learning I got, the way I think as an engineer and try to
apply it in the work I do today. And so definitely it still serves me in a lot of ways. Um, but it was, I would
say that experience coupled with the support that I got from the Cross-Cultural Center and the
mentorship that I got, and the opportunities I had to work there that allowed me to find this field of
student affairs, and specifically multicultural affairs, is the work that I do. And so, that's been kind of the
trajectory and the pathway that I've kind of fallen into. And, you know, like with any position, I don't
know how long I'll be somewhere, but there's definitely something unique and special that I've
experienced here at Cal State San Marcos that is reminiscent of my time as an undergrad at UCI that I
think they're very similar in that at that time, Irvine was not as big as it is now. And it felt very--it was, it
felt like it was just, it was just coming into its own. And I feel like Irv-- Cal State San Marcos is in a similar
way kind of coming into its own as well. And so I think I enjoy those experiences and why working here
has been a great opportunity for me to continue to grow and develop as not only my professional
career, but also participating in the student life that occurs here on campus.
Meyer: Right. Right. Okay. So oh, you can go ahead and take a drink. Yeah. Did any, could you describe
what the Cross-Cultural Center was like when you first came aboard here?
Lai: Yeah so, my understanding and I'm a person who, when I learned real early an adage that I, again,
one of my mentors said, you know it, you don't, you're not really sure where you're going until you
really understood where you've come from. And so I've taken that to heart in a lot of ways. And so, I
worked at UCI for about six years and really understood the history. Coming here I had a very similar, I
didn't know fully--it's different. It's a different campus. It's a different population of students that I work
with. And so, it took some time to kind of understand sort of the history of what the (CSUSM CrossCultural) center is. So, it really appealed to me. We at the time were called Multicultural Programs.
There was a Cross-Cultural Center. It was up in what is currently now where the University Advancement
Office is located in the Commons Area, kind of up there. And I had two offices, that was kind of the
center. And then I was a part of the Student Life and Leadership (SLL), which is now has also evolved in,
it has a different name now on campus: Student Leadership and Involvement Center now. But back then
it was SLL. And I was hired on as the Associate Director of Multicultural Programs. And so what that
meant is that I was a part of Student Life, or at that time, Student Life and Leadership. And I oversaw the
Cross-Cultural Center, but it was also integrated into much of the other programs, which included
orientation at the time, student, student organizations, fraternity and sorority life. It was all
encompassed in that department. So, I had colleagues that had a specific area. And then my area was in
Multicultural Programs, or the Cross-Cultural Center. We were a small office (laughs). My desk was
literally in the middle of everything. No walls, you know, I was just there and everything kind of
happened. There was comfortable couches and things but it was, you know, it was busy. It could be loud
at times. And so, I had to either kind of zone it out so I could focus on the work, or really develop
relationships with the folks and the students that were there. It was, it felt you know, we were still kind

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of growing in a lot of ways. And so, I used the first couple years to really understand, or at least try to
understand where the Cross-Cultural Center at Cal State San Marcos, what its history had been, what its
legacy was at the time, and what it could be, and really understanding that. Um, and so that's kind of the
first kind of impression I got.
I know I did a lot of walking back and forth between my quote unquote office or upstairs. So about,
probably about two days or three days after my first day, which was June 11th, I remember that 2011,
or maybe it was (June) 13, whatever that Monday was, Dilcie Perez, who was my supervisor at the time,
took me to a meeting to talk about the development and construction of the new University Student
Union (building on CSUSM campus that houses student organizations) at the time. So, I got a chance to
see kind of what was gonna happen within the next couple of years. And sure enough, soon as, you
know, this Union the Union was built, we had a much larger space. We--at the time, there were still only
the three centers. So, it was the Cross-Cultural Center at the time, (another center) known as the
Women's Equity Center, or the Women's Center, I should say. It was before it was called the--what it's
current name is (Women and Gender Equity Center), and then the LGBTQIA Pride Center. So it was just
those three spaces and so we each had a space, and really it was a lot more square footage, a lot more
opportunities to kind of do programs and do different things in those spaces. So, I've seen kind of an, an
evolution of how space has affected and been an integral part of what the students experience. Right?
And so, they had now a larger space they could call their home and be able to participate in the
programming that we did.
Meyer: Nice. So, obviously a lot has changed in the years since you have been Director of the CrossCultural Center. What do you think some of the biggest transformations are? I mean, obviously the
space transformed.
Lai: Yeah. I think, you know, students are different, right? I think every year there's a new crop of
students that come in, comes in, and so their--the demographic, their experiences are very different.
The last couple years with COVID in particular. So there, so I think of, you know the students we have
are part of the differences in trying to ensure that we're fulfilling our mission and supporting the
students that come in, whatever experiences they have at the time. So, that I think has evolved and
shifted and changed. I would say the issues too, I think back when I started, not that it wasn't an issue,
but I think questions about diversity, equity and inclusion, weren't as divisive as they feel like right now
to some degree. And the ability to have a difference of opinion, or even be diverse for lack of a better
word, it seemed like there was less of that animosity or even a question of whether that's even integral
or important, than there is now. And so that's been a shift or change that I've seen. Besides obviously
the space. I think the mission has shifted and evolved and changed. So as I've gotten a better sense of,
one, honoring and understanding what the history of the Cross-Cultural Center was here at Cal State San
Marcos. You know, after a couple years, I wanted to put my own sort of spin and, or impact it in a way
that I thought would benefit the students that were here at the time. And so, the mission, not that it's
evolved, it's kind of--well no--it has evolved in a way that I think is trying to be more--trying to meet the
needs of the students that we have currently. So those are some of the things: the programs, the way
it's organized as well, programmatically, so that it aligns with our mission. We're trying to be more
strategic about that as well. And so those have been some of the things that I think I've seen kind of shift
and change, as well as I think just the, just the natural budget cycles, politics and other things that occur
on a college campus.

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Meyer: Can you talk a little bit about the programs that you guys have?
Lai: Yeah, yeah. Our current iteration now, we have, our focus is in four specific areas which include:
developing cultural competency, activism and advocacy, critical engagement across social identity
groups. So, we come from an intersectional lens. And so, recognizing that there is, there are ways that
different people and different identities can interact and have unique outcomes. And so how do we
explore that a little bit? And then the retention of underrepresented students in ensuring that they stay
here and are successful. We have a high number of students who are first generation college students.
And so recognizing that there is additional support that's needed. So those are the four sort of main
pillars, for lack of a better word, that we have in the Cross-Cultural Center that really round us in the
work that we do in the mission of the center. The programs we put on mirror that. So, we have program
series, that we kind of--as a guide for our students. When I first came on, I think--and I think with
anything we want, I was still learning, and so the students had some set programs that they put on, and
you know, it would change and evolve depending on what the student's interests were. And so, it felt
like it was not something con-- there was always an underlying thread, but there was not something
that felt like it was consistent. And so, probably about five or six years ago, we instituted more of a
program series that aligned with the themes that I shared earlier. And so, some of them are direct
correlations. So, for example the Activist Lab, that meets our theme of advocacy and activism, it's an
exploration of different ways in which students or participants can see who, what activists, who they
were, what were their causes, how did they approach creating social change. Protest is absolutely an
integral part of it, but it's not the only way that I think, um, students oftentimes think may be the only
way. And so really helping to explore the different avenues of creating social changes is what we do
within the Activist Lab.
The other one we do as far as retention is called Academe &amp; Me, it used to be called Tukwut Talks:
Conversations with Faculty. But it was really about how to create programs that allow students to
develop relationships with faculty members, recognizing that they were students themselves at one
point, had highs and lows. And you know, and really humanize, I think for lack of a better word, because
I think students oftentimes, either if they don't have a question or unsure about having a conversation
with their faculty member, they don't. They--what do we talk about kind of a thing, right? And so they
often put 'em on this sort of pedestal. And so inviting faculty--and even now we have grad students
come in and participate--but let them know that it's okay that they have, they're just like anyone else.
Maybe even learning about a particular subject of study that perhaps they didn't even know was
something they could study. So that particular--Academe &amp; Me is really about helping to hopefully
create a pipeline of students to go into the professorate or into academia. Again, developing
relationships with them and so, that's part of how we hopefully can retain our students. One final thing
that we do, well two others I'll speak to. One is Critical Cougars: Unlearn. Relearn. And so that really
aligns with the notion of how do we explore those different identities? And in the critical engagements
and this around across social identity groups. It's kind of our largest sort of bucket, ‘cause anything can
be sort of put in that particular bucket, but it's really about how do we unlearn maybe things that we
learned in high school, how do we relearn or even learn for the first time things that we weren't taught
necessarily, depending on where we went. And how do we evolve and continue to change and challenge
ourselves critically in the thinking that we have. And so that's what that sort of program does.
And then finally, I'll speak to something--my identity is, and I didn't, I spoke part of it a little bit earlier
when I introduced myself, but my parents are from Taiwan, so I identify as Asian American, specifically
Chinese American. And so, currently at Cal State San Marcos, there isn't a physical building, or a center

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dedicated to Asian Pacific Islander Desi American students. So with that vacuum, I said you know, the
Cross-Cultural Center and oftentimes a Multicultural Center has served in that sort of capacity; where
the space is there but the other, like the LGBTQIA or the Women's Center, this Cross-Cultural Center in
other, not necessarily here but in other spaces, they've been--they came from that space. And then once
they had a critical mass or felt the need, they were established. So in the same vein, we don't have one
currently. So because of that, and partly because of my own identity as that, we have a program called
Defining Diaspora: Asian Pacific Islander Desi American Identities. Which essentially is just an
exploration of that really large group of individuals and identities that fall under that sort of diaspora.
And so, a lot of programming is, can be about a specific individual, a particular culture, a particular
practice or tradition in those areas. And so that's kind of what Defining Diaspora is meant to do, is to
really help to expose students of those identities, or those that aren't and wanting to learn more about
to those types of cultures and traditions that are part of that.
So those are kind of the programs we do. Underlying all that is really a focus on social justice work. And
so, things that my predecessors started, my immediate predecessor, Sarah (Sheikh) started was the
Social Justice Summit, which is kind of a three-day, two-night retreat. Which really allows a small group
of about forty students the opportunity to explore their personal identities, better understand what
social justice, that term, ‘cause I think we throw it out a lot of times. We want, you know environmental
justice, this kind of justice. And so, what does it really mean when we talk about social justice? Having
an understanding of the dynamics of either oppression or privilege, and really exploring what those
concepts are. And then, we hope, and it's you know it's not always perfect, but it's that third day is then
a focus as we return or plan or prepare ourselves to come back to campus. How do we become allies or
co-conspirators, or how can we better support those communities or identities we may not necessarily
have ourselves? And so, that has been something that's gone on for a while, again that predated me,
and we've just kind of expanded and grown that. So, now we have in addition to the summit, which has
been on hiatus because of COVID but we hope to bring it back this fall, the Symposium which is kind of
more of a conference style. And that sprang out of an understanding that even, again, I'm a big
proponent of tradition or just what legacies have been left behind. There were you know, faculty and
stu-- staff that really wanted to take an opportunity for the campus to explore what social justice means
in a conference sort of setting. So whether it's workshops, presentations. So that kind of has evolved
into our Social Justice Symposium. And then when COVID hit, we couldn't do either one of those. And so
we, my GA, graduate assistant at the time Daniela (Carreon) we, in discussions, we wanted to start a
scholars program. And so, it's kind of a little bit of the summit. It's not the overnight, because it's kind of
a class setting or curriculum. It's over the course of a couple weeks. Similarly, not a very big class, but
very intimate for folks who want to be able to learn about these things and be scholars. And so the hope
is that they're all connected in some way. Scholars can help in presenting at Symposium, Scholars can
also be some of the mentors at the Summit and retreat. And so that's another area that we focus on in
the Cross-Cultural Center, in collaboration now with the other centers, Student Life Centers that exist
here on campus.
Meyer: In what ways do you think, has your involvement with the Cross-Cultural Center helped you
expand and develop as a person and as a professional? I know you've touched a little bit (overlapping
dialogue) butLai: Yeah. Yeah. No, you know, the work I do, I would say absolutely students are at the heart of the
work that we do. And so, as students have evolved and changed in their challenges and their
perspectives have evolved, I in similar fashion, I think have learned from that as well. And so--it's not, I

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say this to students all the time: it's not about saying, “Oh I took this workshop. Check, I'm done with
diversity, or I'm done with this topic.” It's an ongoing, you know, lifelong pursuit of recognizing and
interacting with people that are maybe different from you. And everyone's gonna have a unique
perspective or a unique--I mean there are similar, you know places or, you know people connect to. But
everyone's different. And for that reason, I think I've evolved and developed a more nuanced approach
in how to not only have the conversation around, um, diversity, equity, inclusion, even topics of social
justice. I view my role oftentimes as the Director (of the Cross-Cultural Center) in how do we invite
people to have those conversations? Even if they're difficult, even if they're challenging, even if they're
divisive. Which I know is so hard to do, because why would I wanna sit across the table from someone
who absolutely does not believe I should exist or doesn't agree in a lot of different ways. But I think it's
through that process, that I've been able to kind of learn and grow as well on either approaches or ways
in which we can kind of bring people to the table to have these types of conversations. It is my belief
that I think, and I take that to heart because it's my own experience as I've better understood you know,
the various isms, prejudices, biases and whatnot that I am a better person for it. And I'm more aware of
situations and things that can be changed to enable folks to feel like they're included as part of that
experience, whatever it may necessarily be.
So, you know my father is an immigrant as part of his identity. He was also, he was born in 1940, and so
he was prior to the polio vaccine. So, he has a disability in the sense that he at the time had a brace, and
now it, now he's in a wheelchair. But that allowed me to recognize, I mean, we got so many stairs here
at Cal State San Marcos, sometimes it's hard to know where people have accessibility and things like
that. But so that's something I you know, I grew up with and I recognized, so I thought, “Oh yeah, I know
about disabilities. I get it.” And then more recently at a conference I attended, and this is COVID was still
happening, we had the stickers that said, “Hey, if it's green, we can hug each other. If it's yellow, you
know, maybe like elbows or whatever. And if it's red, no, I want to stay six feet away,” kind of thing. And
so, I was part of a registration group, and I share this in the workshops that I do with students, but I said,
“Okay, great. We're done, right? We just gotta do the stickers.” And a colleague of mine said, “Well,
wait, what if they're colorblind? How would they know which color to pick?” Never occurred to me,
because I'm not colorblind. So, we eventually found a solution. We wrote down, you know, R, Y, and G,
so folks could at least see what was written there, regardless of the color.
But it's those things, those interactions. And I realized that, you know, it's not until you're either
confronted with something or maybe you say something you (laughs) you know, you probably shouldn't
have said that you realize or better understand sort of the experience. And so, my hope in the work that
I do with the Cross-Cultural Center and the experiences that I've gained, I've learned every, every time
I've had an interaction, how I can better hopefully have a future interaction or things that I need to work
on myself a little bit more in recognizing. And so it's an iterative process. And so, I think that's been
something that I've been able to take away because of the fact that I work in a space like this. Versus a
corporate you know, entity or things like that. But because of this, it gives me a really unique
perspective on how our society functions and what things we can do to try and really be as inclusive as
possible for all.
Meyer: So as your time in your role as director, what are the greatest challenges that you believe the
center has faced? I know the pandemic probably threw a wrench in everything.
Lai: Yeah. Yeah. I think that's a big one, right? I think having to pivot within a couple weeks, I think the
university did an amazing job. You know--it's hindsight now knowing some of the impacts. But I think in

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the moment, having to do that, definitely that was one challenge, right? In having to deal now, I think
with students who have to relearn what it's like to be in college, ‘cause they really didn't really get that
experience or relearn what it means to learn even. Because I think those expectations have shifted and
changed. I would say also in my time here, I mentioned a little bit earlier, there is I think more of a--I
wouldn't even call it a critical view of, but critical in the sense of like something that is a critique. Less-It's very critical. I think a lot of folks are questioning things now related to--let me think. Oh, I'm trying
to, it's blank. It's not coming to my mind right now, but just even the necessity for diversity, equity, and
inclusion there are-- Oh, critical race theories, CRT, that's one. Which I think has somehow--education
has always been I think viewed in ways, understandably, because tax-- Public education, I'll speak to
because tax dollars go into it, and so how can we be most sufficient and effective and so forth. And I get
that. But even, you know, things like affirmative action which is, we don't have in California, but even
those concepts and ideas of how do we outreach to underserved or underrepresented populations.
Those things that I think were differences of opinion or approach with regard to policy has taken a very
dark turn in the sense that it's very personal in a lot of ways. And I know and I'm not--I again, I was an
engineer(ing major), so I didn't take any sociology or gender equity studies classes. But I think it may be
second wave feminism but this, the personal is political, is a truism that I think is in a lot of ways where a
lot of the policies and things that are being done are directly targeting certain groups. And so the
challenge for me, and I've wondered this as well because I've seen states now, right? And their
legislatures look at different ways and approaches, such that for example with regard to students that
may go to university in Florida, are getting a very different experience when it comes to interacting or
working (with) others. Partly because of what they can't necessarily discuss or talk about. I have
colleagues, and I'm sure I think I heard from others that Offices of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion had to
rename themselves because they were illegal now to be in some of those spaces.
So I've seen that shift in the sense that I think I'm gonna be, I--my goal as an educator is to really help
the up-and-coming generational students think differently or to be prepared for the work that they do.
Now, it's gonna be compounded by the fact that based on your geography or location or where you go
to school, you're gonna have a very different experience of things that you've been able to experience
as a student. We often say that going to college is kind of a mini version of real life, but here you can
make mistakes and the consequences aren't necessarily like, you know, a lot of times we try to find the
developmental approach within Student Affairs. How do we do this differently? How do we, you know,
it's meant to be a growing opportunity that oftentimes you don't get when you're out in quote unquote
the real world. Things just kind of happen and you--that the consequences are what they are. So, my
fear is that oftentimes now, if my goal is to have students be able to understand and interact with
someone who has no idea or hasn't necessarily had these same experiences or similar types of
experiences, doesn't have to be the same--what's that gonna mean then for our society as a whole?
Right? Because again, depending on your geography or where you go to school, you're in a very
different kind of educational experience compared to someone else who does. I think that where
information comes from, there are some benefits with social media and other things where it has
democratized and allowed multiple--even filming things, catching things that, police brutality and things
like that. So a very democratized, but now the source of where things are and having some level of
information literacy and recognizing where it's (media) coming from it, what's the purpose of what it is,
and where's the quote unquote truth and where do you suss it out, is another challenge I think that I'm
seeing as well in the work that we do. And trying to, we used to start with the same set of facts, and

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now the question is, “Are we still in, are we talking about the same set of facts or not?” (laughs) And so
there's again, some of that that I think sort of needs to happen. And so I see that play out in the work
that we do because, you know I may start with like, “Hey, so this has been the experience,” and
someone might say, “No, that's not.” And so then I want to learn more about where that is. But it's not
necessarily always productive, I guess. And so that's where I see some of the of the challenges in the
work that we're doing with these types of spaces, Cross-Cultural Centers or Multicultural Centers.
Meyer: It's the politicization of something that shouldn't be. Yeah.
Lai: Yeah. In a lot of ways. I mean, I could say this, you know, this notion of public health and how
politicized even with regard to COVID, right? The notion of--and some of this is cultural you know it's
natural for me to think in terms of the collective, because that's you know in Asian cultures broadly
speaking there's a collectivist sort of mentality in how that's supported. America has a very
individualistic streak, which is you know it's not a bad thing. I think where the challenge comes in is
where does one's, where is one's freedom impinged upon and where it's not? And that's been debated
for a long time with free speech and lots of other things, but it has been politicized even in areas like
public health to a lot of degrees. And so that's, yeah. So those, they're not new challenges per se, but
there are new approaches to how do we have these types of conversations, or how do we help educate
and teach about these things in a way that hopefully is broadening and enlightening. So.
Meyer: So what role do you see the Cross-Cultural Center playing as it coexist with the expansion of
identity specific spaces like the Black Student Center and the Latin@/x Center?
Lai: Yeah, that's a great question and one that I wrestle with because I don't know if I necessarily have
an answer myself. You know, I started at the Cross-Cultural Center at UC (University of California) Irvine
which is one of the first centers, and this is the history that was drilled into me. Second only at the time
at the UC system to a University of Washington, at a time when I think resources were scarce. And so, it
made sense to start from a collective cross-cultural sort of center and space. And I would say even for,
depending on where whatever campus you're on, either resources were tied or made sense that
collectively these were cross-cultural or multicultural spaces. They weren't enough, you know. We have
students, understandably within the Black communities, BIPOC, so Black, Indigenous, People of Color
communities who said, you know, “Okay, this is a good start, but it's not meeting the needs that we
have.” And so that's why these spaces then, you know, like a Black Student Center or other spaces have
kind of evolved. The question then becomes: well where does then, once these things have evolved and
come out of necessarily this space, what then becomes the role of this space where it started and how
does it evolve and change? And that's what I've been wrestling with myself because--and I'm not the
only one. University, UCSD, San Diego, they started with the Cross-Cultural Center and now they've got a
Black Student Center, Indigenous Center, and all these other additional spaces. And so, it's been trying
to figure out, besides programmatically, besides the history months or the heritage months, what are
the ways in which they can interact one with another? And so, it's gonna be different on each campus.
But I think the conclusion for me has been, you know, the Cross-Cultural Center is essential, especially if
there's a belief and understanding, which a lot of my colleagues have, about the notion of
intersectionality. We're more than just one-dimensional pieces. I'm, you know, I'm Chinese, but I'm also
American. Identify as a cisgendered male. All of those things play with one another in the experiences
that I have and/or the choices and decisions that I make. And in the same vein I think, there's always

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gonna be a place for a cross-cultural center or multicultural center, because these unique and specific
spaces are serving a purpose. They're helping Black students getting the support they need because they
either, whether it's cultural validation, whether it's just being with someone who doesn't question
(laughs) why you're there. Or isn't peppering you with questions about something they may not be
familiar with, which, you know, naturally happens. “Oh, what about this? Why do you eat this food?
What's that?” You know, those types of things. And I think in most situations it'd be great, but there is
an instance where I think there's fatigue in having to explain yourself all the time or, and so sometimes
it's nice to just be, when you go into a space. Which I can see there's why there are certain spaces,
whether it's the Latin@/x Center and so forth. So, I think some of it depends on the landscape of the
campus of where a particular space may be at. Here, on our campus, for a long, long time, we just had
the Cross-Cultural Center, which is the first one, and it wasn't necessarily born out of protest. Students
didn't demand it, it was just, as I understand the history, administrators had said, “You know, we want
to be prepared for the 21st century student here in North County.” And so, we think this is important.
So we, you know, create this space. Soon thereafter, I want to say it was the Pride Center, and then, or
maybe the other way around, the Women's Center and then a Pride Center that, you know, were under
student government, ASI, at the time. So those were the three centers for a long time.
And then, you know Latinx students said, “We need a space. We're over fifty percent of the population,
where our needs are not being met.” You know, and I for a long time, and I and because this is (laughs), I
think I had a hard time sort of separating myself and not viewing it as a failure on my part, you know.
And students would say, “Oh, it's not you, it's not you. We just need this space.” And I couldn't quite
understand, “Well, I know you're saying it's not me, but what could I do to help support this population
that we're not doing now?” And so, that was what was going on in my mind. And it took me a couple of
well, it took a co--one person in particular and other colleagues to say, “You know, don't get caught up
in that.” And eventually I was okay, right? Like, it makes sense that there are more of these spaces
because that just provides additional support and resources for these communities. So, that should not
be the issue, and you shouldn't get caught up in that. But, you know, it's hard and it--your pride takes a
little bit of a hit when you're like: well, what am I not doing that is, that you need a separate space to
occur? You know, in that same vein, and eventually there'll be most likely well, I know that the President
(of CSUSM, Ellen Neufeldt) has agreed to an Asian Pacific Islander (and Desi American; APIDA) space
here at Cal State San Marcos. And so, the programming that you know, is near and dear to me, doesn't
mean I can't do it but, you know, instead of redundant programs, it'll probably go to a future APIDA
center. And so, it's figuring out, I think what that role is.
And I wish I could say I had a great answer, but I do--I think what I've resolved myself to, or resigned
myself to understand--that's probably not the way right way to say it, but is that there will always, I
think, be a place for a Cross-Cultural Center or Multicultural Center space. What we do in that is gonna
vary. And I've had to adjust. So that's the themes that I shared earlier. And the purpose of, in our
mission and how we kind of structure what we do is intentional because it avoids or tries not to step on
sort of the toes of the other centers and spaces, right? They have their own things that they do and they
support the students. We all have different lenses through which we try to do the same work. And so,
my role I think, as a Cross-Cultural Center is how do we build community? How do we bring these spaces
together? And being more of a connector is something I've kind of started to better understand as far as
what I think this, the role of future cross-cultural center or multicultural center spaces that maybe

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dealing with this might be is, is how do we connect these communities and keep them together in some
way. And continue to find those gaps, those spaces where students may not-- An example is what if I'm
multicultural or multiracial? I don't feel like I belong in the Black Student Center, or I don't feel like I
belong in the Latin@/x Center if I'm both Black and Mexican. And so, I think that's where a space like the
Cross-Cultural Center or a multicultural center could still serve as a purpose in exploring those identities,
helping them to navigate the complexities of what that entails; as well as their gender, sexual
orientation, all of that in helping them to decide that. So, I think that's what I've come to understand.
But the--you know, the verdict's still out on what the (laughs) what that is, and our students keep
changing. So, you know, there could be other things that we need to address and figure out as we move
further along. But my hope ultimately is that whatever it is, that it'll still continue to serve the needs of
the students that are coming to our university and to the institutions that they are applying to.
Meyer: What direction do you think the CCC should grow in from here?
Lai: Yeah. If I had my (laughs)-Meyer: If you had your, if you had your dreams.
Lai: Of course. You know I think I would love to, and we're kind of moving in this direction, I would love
to figure out better ways to support students financially. Whether it's through scholarships or other
things. We are as part of I think this project as well, we're celebrating our 20th anniversary. Which you
know, we're still pretty young. We're still kind of just getting out of our teen years, right? Into our
twenties. But it's a great milestone I think, with regard to being here on this campus. And so, I think
financially looking at ways in which we can support our students. I would love to expand our staff as
well. I think-- t's funny, I've been the longest serving director, but I've also been a staff of one. And so, in
some ways I wonder if I've, if I'd been successful, if there would've been more, other staff members a
part of it. But I would love to see more staff members, because I think there just isn't you know-students' needs are getting more and more complex that require more time, and there's only one of me
and I'd like to see other staff come in and be able to assist the students that are here, that may need
that support. I think there are other areas that we can explore as well when it comes to, you know, we
have a Disability Student Services, but their focus really is on providing the support for students to be
successful. Not necessarily doing programming to help folks understand what those (services) are and
how we can make the--make some changes or differences. People that are neurodivergent, there's just
a lot of different areas and identities that haven't necessarily been explored. But I think those would be
opportunities for a Cross-Cultural Center to kind of be able to provide space or to provide programming
that can help other students understand not necessarily what it's like, but better understand those
conditions and/or maybe consider different ways of thinking about how they, when they have the
opportunity or are placed in a position where they can make a difference, that they're hopefully
considering and thinking about those areas that they themselves perhaps are privileged in. Where they
don't have to worry about or they don't have to think about it in any way.
And so that level of work, I think in programming and approaching and supporting those communities, I
think is other areas where we can see the Cross-Cultural Center sort of grow. I think there's the
conversation about the divisiveness in politics in other ways that, you know, a big part of what I'm doing
now and hopefully will continue to do, has been working with the Civility Campaign (program by the
CSUSM Dean of Students) on our campus. They kind of, when I first started here at Cal State San Marcos,

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the, at the time, this campaign started around the same time, so I've been connected to it for a long
time. But I've seen the significance and importance of how do we have dialogue and conversation-particularly with someone who may just be of a completely different belief system--but hopefully still
get nuggets of wisdom or at least try to understand one another. A lot of, I don't want to make or
simplify to say if we just saw you know, held hands kumbaya, that it was gonna be that easy. I don't
think it's that easy, but I think that is the work that is necessary for students, particularly at a time when
perhaps they've come from very homogeneous communities or they just have never been introduced to
someone. To be able to find ways in which those kinds of opportunities can help them to grow and be
eventually a better graduate of Cal State San Marcos, because they've had experiences or programs that
have introduced them to these types of things that they haven't necessarily done before. So, I think
long-term those are some things I'm hoping that the Cross-Cultural Center can play an active role in
supporting or perhaps being a big part of really proactively engaging our students in a way that again,
makes those students that graduate from Cal State San Marcos really the premier students here in
North County. And who go on to become leaders and folks that are making these decisions in the
community.
Meyer: I'm sure you have a lot, but could you share a few of your favorite memories from your time at
the Cross-Cultural Center?
Lai: Yeah. You know, it's hard to think about. I mean, there's so many different ones. I think I value the
different student leaders that have worked with me. From the very first time, when we called them peer
educators at the time. Because I'm a staff of one, I rely heavily on my student staff to really help in
getting a lot of the work and the mission of the center done. And so, some of my fondest memories are
those different folks that have worked alongside me. Getting to know them, getting to hear about their
experiences here on campus. Now seeing them graduate as alumni and really kind of, you know, off in
the world and kind of doing some amazing things. I, in Higher Ed you know, I recall after my fifth year
that was the first year that I had a student that I knew was a freshman or a first-year student that I saw
all the way through and graduate. You know, I've had other students that graduated along the way, but
the--that was the first group that I knew from the first time they stepped foot into campus all the way
through till they graduated, even transfer students as well. And so, that's one I think fond memory. I
love the staff that, I love the staff that I work with now, but also even before when I was part of Student
Life and Leadership, Dilcie Perez (formerly in charge of Student Life and Leadership) was my supervisor.
And I think she instilled a lot of laughter and like just fun stuff in the work that was oftentimes can be
hard and challenging. And so, those are some fond memories. We have a unique tradition here at Cal
State San Marcos around Halloween, where a lot of folks dress up, in--within Student Affairs I should
say. (laughs) But it's a big deal, and I don't think I fully realized it until I first came to this campus and
experienced it for the first time. But some of the different traditions and things like that have been fun
and interesting to see.
I--commencement is always a fun time where a lot of the memories that I have that I can recollect.
When I have had the chance, a lot of us volunteer and help support the program. So, being able to see
them (students) cross the stage, see their families and watch them witness their students cross the
stage. And again, a lot of them are first generation, first in their families (to graduate college) and the joy
and the excitement that they see, those are some memories that I'll definitely keep for a long time.
Because I think that is what grounds me. And I know a lot of my colleagues say this, but commencement

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is kind of, it--the students, yes. But also seeing them achieve and be able to get to that point. And the
excitement is also refreshing and kind of a reminder of the work and why we do it. So, when we deal
with policy issues or just challenges with bureaucracy of the university, it's always nice to remember
those moments because then it reminds at least me of what and why I do the work that I do, and why
it's so critical and important. Or at least I would like to think that it's a big part of their experience that
they have here at Cal State San Marcos.
Meyer: Well, thank you so much, Floyd. You've been a pleasure to interview and yeah, thank you so
much.
Lai: Thank you. Thanks for taking the time.
Meyer: All right. That was great. (laughs).

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              <text>            5.4                        Lai, Floyd. Interview,  April 19, 2021      SC027-03      1:16:56      SC027      California State University San Marcos University Library Special Collections oral history collection                  CSUSM      This oral history was made possible in collaboration with the Black Student Center and with generous funding from the Instructionally Related Activities fund.      csusm      California State University San Marcos. Black Student Center      California State University San Marcos. Cross-Cultural Center      Education, Higher      Racism -- California -- Irvine      Student success      University of California Irvine. Cross-Cultural Center      San Marcos (Calif.)      Irvine (Calif.)      Floyd Lai      Ayana Ford      mp4       LaiFloyd_FordAyana_04-19-21_Access.mp4      1.0:|16(14)|26(9)|40(9)|51(8)|64(5)|76(9)|89(3)|101(10)|112(18)|125(4)|136(11)|153(5)|166(17)|177(4)|191(16)|202(15)|213(12)|224(14)|238(5)|257(3)|267(9)|278(14)|289(13)|301(6)|313(14)|324(17)|341(11)|355(13)|366(4)|380(7)|394(12)|407(4)|419(7)|431(8)|443(11)|456(15)|468(15)|480(4)|502(4)|517(13)|529(8)|543(4)|555(12)|568(7)|582(11)|592(5)|604(3)|616(10)|630(4)|644(15)|657(9)|668(10)|681(13)|695(8)|709(9)|722(14)|735(7)|748(12)|766(4)|784(5)|796(13)|808(12)|823(5)|836(7)|850(12)|863(17)|875(6)|889(8)|900(11)|914(7)|927(6)|940(13)|953(9)|966(7)|978(15)|994(3)|1019(3)                  0            https://archivesoralhistories.csusm.edu/files/original/4ef778dfa6ec0355e8c50df20e5a2bc3.mp4              Other                                        video                  English                              0          Interview Introduction                                        Interview of Floyd Lai by Ayana Ford, April 19, 2021. Interview was conducted over Zoom and has a few moments towards the end with technical issues.                                                                                    0                                                                                                                    35          Childhood                                        Lai recounts his childhood as a Chinese American son of immigrants in Hawaii, Idaho, and California, and his introduction to concepts of race and ethnicity.                                                                                    0                                                                                                                    306          Learning about the Black community                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    423          Lai's college and professional experience with issues of race/ethnicity                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    775          Personal impact of Black activism and social justice movements                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    1188          History of Cross Cultural Center and early campus spaces                                                                                                                             0                                                                                                                    1440          Needs of students, staff, and faculty involved in the Black Student Center's creation                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    1782          University Administration's vision for the Black Student Center                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    2105          Opposition to the creation of the Black Student Center                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    2395          Opening of the Black Student Center                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    2690          Early focus of the Black Student Center                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    2969          Collaborations between Black Student Center and Cross Cultural Center                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    3522          Reorganization: Black Student Center move from Student Success to Student Life                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    3704          Issues in the early days of the Black Student Center                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    3876          Purpose of the Black Student Center                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    4196          Impact of Black Student Center on Lai                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    4331          Future expectations of the Black Student Center                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    4534          Lai's thoughts on the Black Student Center Oral History Project                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                              oral history      Floyd Lai was the director CSUSM's Cross-Cultural Center 2011 - 2023, where he engaged with students and their social justice and activism. Lai attended the University of California Irvine before coming to Cal State San Marcos. Lai saw the growth of the Black Student Center, and helped it grow by supporting and aiding students.  Lai also discusses his life and childhood.            Ayana Ford: So, today is Monday, April 19th, 2021, at one-oh-two p.m. I am Ayana Ford, a student at San Marcos and today I’m interviewing Floyd Lai for the Black Student Center Oral History Project, a collaboration between CSUSM Black Student Center and the CSUSM University Library Special Collections. Mr. Lai, thank you for being here with me today.  Floyd Lai: Pleasure. Thank you, Ayana.  Ford: I’d like to start by talking about your childhood a little bit. When and where were you born?  Lai: I was born on the island of Oahu in Kahuku in Hawaii, and that was in 1974.  Ford: Can you tell me a little bit about your childhood?  Lai: Sure. My parents are immigrants, originally from Taiwan. I am the oldest of three sons, three boys. We moved around. My parents initially settled in Hawaii, and then we moved to Idaho, and then eventually to southern California by the time I was six. I have lived in California since about 1980, so pretty much consider myself a native in the sense of being in southern California for the majority of my lifetime. And I would say it was a pretty ordinary, I guess, childhood in the sense that, again, being the oldest of three boys, there were obviously some cultural components in the roles and responsibilities of what that entailed, being the eldest. I also had responsibility over my two younger brothers as well, just with regard to how we were growing up, and it was pretty common as far as an immigrant experience, keeping in mind both of my parents worked. And I think, at an early age, I—there’s a term that was called, not necessarily pejorative but it was a latch key kid. So, I had a key around my neck so that when I would walk home from school, I’d be able to get inside the house, and pretty much had responsibility for my brothers from an early age as well.  Ford: I know that. I’m the youngest, so— (both laugh) So, how did that help you come to an understanding of your culture at all? How did your childhood help you come to understand your culture?  Lai: Yeah. You know, I would say it was a part of my upbringing in the sense that it guided and dictated—and it was just par for the course, meaning that outside of any influence or education about some of the histories that we learn about at school, it was just part of my upbringing, right? So, being from a Chinese immigrant family, eating Chinese food, right? (chuckles) Everything was just taken as something that was innate and part of the way in which I was raised. I would say that the first instance that I recognized or noticed that perhaps I was different from others was probably not until my middle school years, in the sense that I think first through sixth in elementary school, the community in which I grew up—I grew up in Rowland Heights, California, which is in Los Angeles County. At the time, it was relatively pretty diverse, but I think the friends that I had were of different backgrounds, different ethnicities, different races. And as time progressed and if you were to go back to that community now, there has been a huge influx of immigration, particularly from China and Taiwan because of institutions, like there’s a large Buddhist temple in the adjoining city in Hacienda Heights, and we’ve seen some of the demographic shifts and changes. So, growing up in middle school was probably where I started noticing and gravitating towards individuals who were much like myself, who were also of Asian background or identity or descent. I was on the seventh grade, eighth grade basketball team. And so, I would say that probably was my first introduction to other races, like Black individuals or Mexicans or Latinos at the time. But I didn’t necessarily have a good understanding of the differences when it came to race and ethnicity until very much later, probably not until I graduated from high school and got into college and started taking classes and/or having discussions about that.  Ford: So, to follow up on that, during your childhood and adolescence, were you taught about Black history and the Black community?  Lai: You know, the extent of that probably was Martin Luther King, Jr., right? ;  Black History month, limited to just the month of February. My earliest recollection—I think I may have done research on George Washington Carver, right? Learning about, I think it was peanut butter or a lot of, I think, the stories and notions of Black history that was primarily in our history books, right? And it was all the positive portrayals, right, or images of things and people, right? Obviously, since then and more recently with different projects like, I’m blanking. Is it the 1692 Project or things that are in the media now that talk about slavery and other things, right? My recollection of that when I was in elementary, middle, or even high school was maybe a short chapter, if that, on slavery and the Civil War, but never necessarily through a Black lens or a portrayal beyond just the significant notables like Martin Luther King, Jr., maybe some musicians, Louis Armstrong, things that we would hear about or note, but there was never an extended conversation about that. I played basketball, as I mentioned, in seventh and eighth grades. So, I knew Black students or teammates of mine. We didn’t necessarily hang out. We just played our basketball games and whatnot. But that was really the extent of it. So, we played basketball on the same team, but then beyond that, our circles didn’t necessarily overlap, one with another.  Ford: So, after you came to San Marcos, how did that change? Prior to your coming here to San Marcos.  Lai: Yeah. Coming to San Marcos as a staff member, I’ve had more—I’ve been out here at Cal State San Marcos for the last ten years. Prior to that, I worked at UC Irvine for about six years. And then, even before that, I graduated in 2000 from undergraduate, UC Irvine as well. That’s where I did my undergraduate program in environmental engineering. So, I was on a track or trajectory to go into engineering, in the engineering field. My first notion, I think in a broader sense, was in my undergraduate experience at UC Irvine. Well, so from a personal experience as an Asian American, Chinese American man, I have shared this story with others when I do workshops and presentations. But my first introduction to a personal impact was—I forget the year. I want to say 1995 or ‘96, per se. I was the recipient, on the receiving end at the time, of a hate incident through email. So, myself and others, back in the day—this is when the internet was still (laughs) kind of coming out—you had to go to a lab to jump on and connect. And there were localized areas and whatnot. But I received an email essentially saying, “I’m going to kill all you eff’in Asians. You ruin the curve,” things like that, that really started me on a trajectory and path to really be more reflective about my own personal identity as a Chinese, Asian American man. You know, “I just got this. What is this? Not sure,” you know. Come to find out later on, it was a student who obviously felt the need or desire to broadcast this message, this hateful message, to whomever was in the lab at the time. And the way he identified folks was if they had an Asian sort of sounding last name. And those that were there, myself included, were the lucky recipients of that. So, that started me on a trajectory, just kind of where I am today. I mean I think that would be a critical, pivotal point in the work that I do within multicultural affairs, and doing the work that I do in the Cross-Cultural Center. It was a personal moment where I started thinking why was I the recipient? What caused this, right? To think about issues in terms of race. And it’s through that soul searching and connections to the Cross-Cultural Center at UC Irvine that I got involved. Then I said I wanted to explore that a little bit more. I was involved in various clubs. I was part of the Hawaii club. I’m not myself native Hawaiian, but it was something. I was born there, and it was something that I gravitated towards. And it was through those interactions that I started getting involved and going to programming with the Cross-Cultural Center at that space and Center, which I eventually got to work at prior to coming here to Cal State San Marcos, when I worked there for about six years. I got introduced to the Black Student Union, right? MEChA which is a student organization that often helps to—We call them umbrella organizations. They are the political, social wing of the experiences at UC Irvine at the time: Asian Pacific Student Association ;  again, these larger groupings. And so, I worked at the Center as a volunteer initially, then as an intern, and then I was involved in a program called REACH. They’ve changed their name since, but it was called Reaffirming Ethnic Awareness, Community, Harmony. So, I learned about workshops. I got really deeply involved in understanding, for example, the different experiences within the various communities, whether it was the Asian community, the Black community, the LatinX community—LatinX wasn’t a term at the time, right—so, the Latino community, and the different sort of experiences. I would say also during that time at UC Irvine was the first time I took an Asian—So, I was an engineer. So, that was my trajectory and pathway. It’s very fixed. You can’t deviate too much, right?  Ford: Yeah.  Lai: You know, you’ve got your sciences classes. You’ve got your engineering classes. But, on occasion, I had the ability to take some of electives. And so, one of the electives I chose was an Asian American Studies class which was helpful for me, as well, as I was just trying to get into and understanding of some of those issues and areas. So, between my experience at the Cross-Cultural Center at UC Irvine, some of the classes I was able to take, the interactions that I had, obviously hanging out at the Cross-Cultural Center at UC Irvine, I got to meet the leaders of the Black Student Union from the American Indian Student Association. These were folks that I was able to run in circles or I would see on a regular basis. They had retreats and other opportunities for student leadership exposure. And so, that’s where I was able to expand and grow my experience. And at the time I wasn’t sure if I was going into the field of higher education that I am in now. It was just something that was supplementary to understanding some of those things at that time in my own personal development, of my own identity, and in relation to other people.  Ford: So, as you mentioned before, you had talked a little bit about how the different movements were. How has Black social justice and activism such as Civil Rights Movement, Feminism, and Black Lives Matter Movement affected you?  Lai: Yeah. I would say that’s a more recent, and I would say it’s an ongoing, evolutionary progression for me, right? Let me start more recently and maybe work backward. I would say this past summer, last summer, with George Floyd—And, again, he was not the first and nor was he the last, as we’ve seen more recently with the continued impacts of anti-Black racism occurring. I would say, however though, that that coupled with the pandemic and other things, right, I think galvanized. And we saw our country and nation as a whole get to a turning point, right? And so, that’s something that I would say is the strong notion of anti-racism, of anti-Black racism particularly, and how it’s situated within the context of my understanding of racism and discrimination broadly, was really galvanized there. The Black Lives Matter Movement I know occurred a couple of years earlier, right, with Ferguson and some of those things. So, there has been a steady, I think, beat in my own personal understanding in history of the Black experience and where I fit and situate, right? I often felt as if I was a bystander to some degree, someone who’s looking outside looking in and trying to understand but, obviously, not recognizing those experiences personally. And there’s a certain level of privilege in that too, right? So, because I’m not Black and I don’t have to go through some of those things, I have the luxury of not having to worry about those things, right? So, yes, it’s horrible. Yes, it’s awful. And I felt a lot of empathy for situations and crises like this. And why does this continue to occur? But I would say that, going back to George Floyd, that was a pivotal point in my own personal experience in recognizing—one, because I mean my first name is Floyd, so it was weird hearing so-and-so was on the neck of Floyd. And so, there was this kind of weird connection as well, because his last name just happens to be my first name. And so, there was almost this personal connection now because I would see Floyd in narratives and things like that about the experiences with police. And so, it was very personalizing in that way. So, I think that, and then going back to Black Lives Matter, I would say my background and trajectory and pathway, especially in this field of social justice work, I was never—compared to probably some of my colleagues—I was never a super activist, right? I wasn’t out there chanting or demonstrating. There were a few times I was part of marches or walks, but nothing that felt very heavily involved. Part of the reason why is because I think, also personally, my purpose was I’m going to get an engineering degree. This is all nice but that’s not my focus. And then, as I came to my own sort of personal consciousness and awakening myself, I started to see how education could be an opportunity to better understand. And I felt like I could have an impact on things as well, right? Personally, and professionally, in a lot of ways. So, going back to your initial question, I think those experiences have continued to evolve for me. I think there are better nuances in the sense—or better is not the right word. I have more nuance in understanding that experience and how I fit into that, right? This last summer, there is more of a commitment. Now, anytime we make a commitment or a desire to change, we always have to check ourselves to see if we’re still in that same frame of mind. But I have a stronger commitment to trying to dismantle anti-Blackness and try to dismantle racist notions. And even more so now, going back to my identity as an Asian American, in what ways does my own culture and my own upbringing, does my own lens, as an Asian American, help to contribute to some of that, right? I was having a conversation with some colleagues of mine and thinking back, when I was younger, going back to that kind of thing, there was this rule about who I was able to date. Right? Who would be acceptable to date? So, obviously, my parents are Chinese. So, if you can find someone, and I identify as heterosexual, so if you find a nice Chinese girl, right, that’s at the top of the list, if you can find someone that you want to date. And at the bottom of the list, right, was someone who was more dark-complected or Black, right? That was not in my wheelhouse or realm. And so, a lot of that sentiment that seemingly is innocuous—I mean, my parents are immigrants and so this notion, right, coming from Taiwan where there’s not a lot of people of color, right? They’re mostly Chinese or indigenous individuals but there were still notions of colorism, right? The darker the skin, don’t be out in the sun too much because not only is it bad for you but also you don’t want to be too dark-complected. So, a lot of those things that I took, I viewed different then, I look at now in the lens of how that can contribute to notions of anti-Blackness, right, and what that role looks like. And then, I’m a father of two young girls. And so, what is now my role as someone who can influence, particularly those in my own family, what those thoughts and ideas look like? How do I have and hold conversations with my children and social media, everything. Compared to when I was younger, you had to read the newspaper, watch television. There were only three news channels, right? Cable was satellite media, as I was getting a little bit older. So, there were only so many sources of news. Now, there are so many places where you can get information. And so, how do I structure those conversations or perhaps take opportunities to have conversations with them about these diverse issues, racially, or around sexual orientation, around gender, right? And I’ve been surprised. I mean, a lot of them have been reading books that have exposed them to a lot of concepts that I probably wouldn’t have been reading prior, because the authors weren’t writing about those topics, right, about gender fluidity or any of those things. They’re much more comfortable in using that language than I was at their age, at that time. I don’t know if I answered your question? It’s kind of long-winded. But those are just, I mean, just some initial thoughts about some of those movements and around social justice in general.  Ford: Mm-hmm. You answered the question perfectly. Thank you. (chuckles)  Lai: Okay.  Ford: So, what role did you play in the creation of the Black Student Center?  Lai: Yeah. Other than perhaps a cheerleading role on the sidelines—So, I’ll give you a little bit of history, just also for the purposes of this recording. You know, the Cross-Cultural Center is—not was, but is the first established now what’s called the Student Life Center. So, we were established in 2003. So, at the time, with no other Centers or spaces, we kind of had to do everything. And again, this wasn’t me. It was my predecessors, right? And so, once the Cross-Cultural Center—I think soon thereafter it was the Women’s Center, now currently called the Gender Equity Center, Pride Center. And then there was a huge gap, and probably within the last 5-7 years, the LatinX Center, and then most recently, the Black Student Center. So, my role has been as sort of a cheerleader of it. We had a student who worked as student staff. Her name is Chanel Bradley. She’s an alum of Cal State San Marcos. She revived the Black Student Union, BSU, during her time here. And she worked with Robert Aiello-Hauser who is the director of the LGBTQA Pride Center in a lot of those things. At the time, there were just the three: the Women’s Center, the Cross-Cultural Center, and the LGBTQA Pride Center. So, when I came in 2011, we overlapped. Chanel was I think in her second to last or last year, right? So, she was involved in developing. And since there wasn’t a Black Student Center at the time, I was sort of the support mechanism, right, along with some of the other Centers in providing support for the Black students. So, we played roles in supporting them programmatically, trying to work with them. If you were to come in person to the Cross-Cultural Center, I helped to develop things like, at the time when it was called Black History month, now it’s called Black Excellence month, but Black History month. And in my early couple of years being on campus, I was focused on how do we create space to celebrate or to discuss and talk about these issues. (starts to adjust his chair. Both laugh.) I’m sorry. My chair keeps sinking and I’m not doing anything, and so I keep having to adjust. So, my role was really more advisory, if that. Trying to play a support role. Trying to support our students. This is even before the establishment or the creation of a Black Student Center. I would say, then, after that, I still continued to have relationships supporting the Black Student Union. At the time, the Cross-Cultural Center was a subset of what was known then as the Student Life and Leadership or SLL. And SLL, now called the Student Leadership and Involvement Center or SLIC, was in charge of student organizations. So, I as the Cross-Cultural Center, had responsibility over some of the student cultural organizations, of which BSU was one. And so, that was where my relationship continued to build with them, trying to support them, do leadership, trying to support the students who were a part of that. Around that time, as the LatinX Center got some momentum and eventually was established, right, there were students in the Black Student Union who said, “Hey.” The argument one could say is, for the LatinX Center, the population at campus was almost 50%—it was pretty high—that identified as Hispanic or LatinX or Latino. And so, there was a need for resources and support. On the other side of the spectrum, and this is not to take away from Native American or American Indian students, Indigenous students, the second lowest were Black students, I think hovering around 2-3%. And so, students at the time had expressed an interest and desire to say, “We need a space too because there’s not enough of us.” It was not so much because there’s so many, but it was a lack of visibility and a lack of resources to recruit. And I came to learn later on, it was an issue with some of the reputation of the area, right, whether or not it’s a welcoming and inviting space, whether or not there was a critical mass of faculty or staff so students would feel like, yes, I want to come to Cal State San Marcos. So, my role was very much tangential, was very much on the outsides trying to support it, recognizing that students needed additional resources and support in order to be able to provide them a space to congregate, a space to be able to discuss about issues that are specific to the Black community. BSU did that, right, to some degree. It just wasn’t necessarily as organized or had the resources and the staffing and the dedicated time that I think John, the current director John, is able to put forth in helping to support that community, right? And so, that’s the extent off my experience in relation to the creation and establishment of the Center. It was truly student developed and student driven. They organized and decided that they wanted to create a space. They were going to go and make a demand to the president, President Haynes at the time, and were strategic about when and how to demand or ask, right, (chuckles) strategically about the need for this. And I would say President Haynes, at the time, I think it—I wouldn’t say caught her off guard. I think it was very impactful because now she was on the spot and she could also challenge them and say, “Okay. What are the needs? Tell me what you need. Draft a proposal.” So, she put it right back to the students. And so, the students then went to work and they said, “Okay. This is what needs to happen.” And then, with support from faculty and staff, the Black Student Center was eventually established here at Cal State San Marcos.  Ford: So, you helped support everyone. (chuckles)  Lai: Yeah. Yeah.  Ford: So, what did the student staff involved in the creation of the Black Student Center feel like they needed directly? I know you went into a little detail about it, but is there anything?  Lai: Yeah. I’m very aware and I’ve actually shared with student activists, I say I’m here to support but I’m also part of the institution. (laughs) So, I think they were savvy enough to know like okay, I can only share this much with Floyd. So, I don’t know all the details of the thing. What I recall though was some of the things that I shared with you, that there was a lack of visibility for Black students and therefore there was a sort of spiral effect because at least the argument at the time was if I don’t see people like myself or other Black students, why do I want to come here to Cal State San Marcos? There’s no place for me to feel like I belong. So, a sense of belonging was one. A sense of programming that was dedicated. I shared with you, prior to that, I put together a Black History Month event about being Black in America and we kind of cobbled together some programming that would talk about those issues. But I wasn’t Black, right? So, I relied heavily on Black faculty or staff or even the students, to come up with ideas and concepts that could speak to that experience. But again, I was from an outsider view. I’m not Black and I don’t have that experience so I can’t speak to it. And, probably, this is just my take on it, there’s not a sense of authenticity or even—credibility is not the right word, but just authority as a Black individual to say this is what we need. I was kind of like “Hey. How can we help put this together programmatically so that there’s some visibility.” But I wasn’t—again, not being Black myself. So, I think that was another piece, seeing some additional programming that spoke to the community as opposed to from an outsider lens trying to see and fill a void that was there. I think there was also a desire for just a space. I mean, I think that’s where it always stems from. And I’m very cautious too, because I think any time you advocate for a Center or a space, if your only argument is we need a space, okay, well what’s that space supposed to do? Because there is strength, obviously, in numbers. But you could hang out in the dining hall. You can hang out outside and carve out your own space. So, what is the need for a Center? And so, I think they wanted to look at resources, ways in which tied to student success, to graduation rates. So, those are some things that I think eventually made it into the initial proposal and/or if not part of the demands into the proposal. And, you know, I think students had a lot of support from faculty and staff, as far as hearing their concerns and then being able to articulate that in a way to eventually formulate the initial plans for the movement towards an establishment of the Black Student Center on campus.  Ford: So, what did you think the university administration communicated was their vision for the Black Student Center?  Lai: I think they communicated that there was a desire to have it. I don’t know if they necessarily dictated what it was going to be. In my experience, to some degree, I think that as an administrator you’re looking at every piece, right? Where is it going to be? I mean, just because the president of an institution or a university says “Yes, it’s going to happen” doesn’t mean all the answers are (next few words unintelligible due to poor reception) Yes, it’s going to happen. Now figure out how it’s going to work (unclear) I think there was a commitment or a desire to meet the students, what they’re wanting to have. And I’ll be the first to say I think students have a lot of power, more so than they often think, when it comes to political will and capital because—And not to say that just because you could do it, you should. But because there’s the desire there, they articulated a good reason for why there was a need for a Black Student Center that was compelling enough that I think that the institution said “Okay. We’re going to do that.” Right? And so, the commitment was yes, we’re dedicated to this. It’s one of our values. Now, whether or not and there’s going to be personalities and histories of whether or not you believe what the president is saying or doesn’t say or the rest of the administration, there was definitely a commitment though on the heels of a LatinX Center being established, that there was the need because these two populations, both the Brown and Black populations, had different systemic issues, right? Whether it was retention as I mentioned earlier, or student success when it came to graduation rates, there was a desire. And so, both of these Centers actually stemmed or started from a—and this gets too much into the nitty gritty, but they came up through Student Academic Support Services. And so, their focus was primarily on student success. Whereas for me, in the Cross-Cultural Center, Gender Equity Center, and Pride Center, we all came up through different ways. The Gender Equity and Pride Center or Women’s Center came up through Associated Students. And so, it was very much student driven, student funded, right? That was funding stream. The Cross-Cultural Center was established under Student Life, under this engagement in Student Activities, that kind of thing. And the Black Student Center, LatinX Center, came under Student Academic Support Services. Now, they all overlap in a lot of ways, but it was very targeted, right? When you think of Student Academic Support, you’re thinking testing materials, time management, skills that were necessary for student success. And so, I think those were some elements that there was a dedication to, right, by the institution, by the university. So, we want these spaces to fall under this area because we want to increase the student success of both Black communities as well as Latino communities. So, I think that was what was communicated and conveyed by the institution. The rest of the details were left up to the person in charge at the time, right, to develop and see through what that would look like. Currently—and I would say this is more recently—my current supervisor, the Associate Vice President of Student Life, Dr. Gail Cole-Avant—she came on probably around the same time, no, about a year or two after the Black Student Center. So, prior to that, we all reported to different people. And so, that also meant that there was different focus and different priorities for each of our spaces. And so, this reorganization with the Vice President of Student Affairs, Dr. Checa, to combine and create this new space where all the Centers were consolidated as a result of some external reviews was, I think, in a good way the university saying, “We need to do better. And this is our way to make sure that we are all aligned in moving forward,” because it kind of felt like we were going in three different directions, right, because ASI, Student Government, they have an agenda, a mission, a focus. My area around student leadership and student life is different. And then Black Student Center and the LatinX Center around student success and academics. So, they’re kind of different. They definitely overlap but they’re on different trajectories. By bringing them together, I think the institution is also saying that there’s a commitment to doing better, to moving towards success in aligning the resources, helping. We all support one another. We’re all staffs of one, to a certain degree. We rely heavily on graduate assistants and undergraduate students who work in our spaces. So, us leveraging and supporting one another I think provided a pathway to be able to move forward in a way that perhaps the Black Student Center wasn’t able to do prior.  Ford: So, do you know of any pushback, internal or external, against the opening of the Black Student Center?  Lai: You know, I think with any creation of new space where resources are being allocated, there are always going to be detractors and individuals who feel like is this the best use of our resources, right? I would say, from my lens where I was situated, there was not necessarily so much pushback per se as much as it was trying to understand what the purposes were, right? We knew we could have a Black Student Center. I was actually—just as far as my connection to the Center and I forgot about this—I was on the committee that selected the first director, right, or was invited to be a part of that. So, we knew at the time that the director was really going to set the stage, especially being the inaugural director for a brand-new space. This individual would have to articulate the vision ;  would be able to link and connect with those that were on campus, both those that support it and perhaps even those that didn’t ;  and be able to pool those resources together ;  more importantly—and I think this was probably the priority—really build a rapport and a relationship with students, right, and student organizations because even if you build it, if they don’t come, then, you know—. So, you really need to help to let students know what is the purpose, why is it here, why it’s important, and to build those relationships. So, I would say that that was where our focus was. Outside of that, I don’t think that I was aware of. I wasn’t involved in any particular pushback. Was there? I’m sure there was, right? Others that may have said, I think—and it’s the same sort of trope—White students, and I use that broadly, right? But where is our White Center, right, because if you’ve got a LatinX Center, you’ve got a Black Student Center, where is the White Center? So, a lot of these things started coming through perhaps, right? Again, those were often funneled through the Office of Inclusive Excellence at the time. And so, I wasn’t necessarily a part of those sort of conversations or comments. But I will say that once a Center is established, then you start to get “Well, what about us? What about our Center? Where’s the Middle Eastern Center? Or where’s the Muslim Center, right, where we can pray? What about the Asian American Center, APIDA Center? What about the Jewish Center for the Jewish students on campus?” And so, I think it’s not so much pushback but it’s more of the “What about us now? What now?” Now that we’ve started this precedent, what does that mean? And so, I think there may have been obviously some conversations and discussions, maybe even some disagreements around that approach as well. But, beyond that, I didn’t necessarily hear any specific pushback to that because I think students had done a good job in I think articulating it. They had worked really closely with faculty. And also, the Black Faculty and Staff Association, they really helped to drive that home. So, I think, collectively, there was a desire to see that this would be successful.  Ford: Mm-hmm. So, speaking of the opening, were you able to attend the grand opening?  Lai: I try to remember. (laughs) That was a couple of years ago. I think I was in the back. And I don’t remember what year you are in school. Have you been? It’s on the 4th floor—  Ford: Yeah, I’ve been. (chuckles) Yeah.  Lai: —which is right by the stairwell. There’s not a lot of space and room in general, right?  Ford: Mm-hmm. Yeah.  Lai: So, I think it was up there. They did a ribbon cutting ceremony up there. I recall being kind of in the back (indicates behind him with both arms) because there’s only so much space you can have, right, in front, of where it was. And that’s my recollection because I think there was a photo that I saw on a website way back when, when it was first established, or there may still be one in the archival footage, of the first director and then also with President Haynes doing some ribbon cutting and ceremonial things with the Center. But, after that, the first, his name was Anthony Jett. I, along with some of the other directors for the Centers, we all collaboratively work together. And so, I would have opportunities, right, to connect with the first director in trying to figure out programmatically different ideas, different approaches, and ways to look at the situation and how we can ensure the success of the Center.  Ford: Mm-hmm. So, how did it feel the first time you visited the Center? You have any (last word unintelligible)  Lai: Yeah. Well, so I’ve been here long enough that, you know, that space prior—there was some work that had to be done. That used to be the meditation stress-free zone, I guess. It was meant to be a prayer space, initially. So, it has undergone some renovation. But if you ever go up to the bathroom that’s right there as well—because there used to be a display case—and so they had removed it and created space so the folks could actually access it. There’s a gender-neutral bathroom or single stall use bathroom up there. But you’ll notice it’s different from others because there’s actually a—oh, I’m forgetting what the Islamic term is for it—but a wash station. So, you can sit. And so, the intent was that for those, particularly those, of our Muslim faith that we had a dedicated space for spirituality, prayer. Sometimes, it was a nap space, right, but for meditation. So, it was converted from that. And so, it’s right above the Cross-Cultural Center when you look at the specs. They did a really great job with the small amount of space that was there, right? I would say also, too—and being all transparent as well—having a space is important. Where the space is located is also important. So, we ran out of room on the 3rd floor. There was no other way to chop up. The LatinX Center got wedged in between the Cross-Cultural Center and the Gender Equity Center. It used to be called the Social Justice—It was meant to be a training space, and they made (words cut off. Maybe “it into”?) the LatinX Center, right? And in the same vein, we can’t have a Black Student Center halfway across the campus. It has to all be in the same space, but we ran out of room. So, it’s on the 4th floor. And so, the fact that they converted it, I mean it’s a beautiful space. You have nice views. You can see it. It’s a small space, right? It can get crowded real quickly, especially if you get a critical mass, like a lot of our spaces, but just in general. And it’s right up on the top so there’s a lot of visibility as folks are walking past and go through. What I will say, though— and this is something that I think all Centers and spaces struggle with—if you see a community of people in the space, there’s always this question of do I belong here or don’t I, right? And so, I did hear early on, right, some of the challenges were “Oh, I’m not Black. I can’t go in the space. (chuckles) Should I set foot inside?” Even though if you want to learn about—Just because it’s called the Black Student Center, it’s focused on Black issues and other things that affect the Black community, but it’s not limited to individuals who identify as Black. And so, that has always been a tension, right, when it comes to who can come into the space, who’s allowed to step through the doors. Do I feel comfortable? Some of that we, as directors of our spaces, we try to make it as inviting as much as we can. But, ultimately, it’s up to that student to step through that door (chuckles) and take that step to go inside that space. So, you know, it was a beautiful space. They had a great computer lab, self-publish stations. It was very tiny so there was one office and one desk. There was a small kitchenette and other things that you would normally want to see in a student-centered space for individuals. So, yeah, it was an exciting time. I would say, like any new spaces on campus, we want to make sure that they’re successful. And people hung out there. I will say, right, so just being in the Cross-Cultural Center and as these spaces have evolved and developed, people that we normally would have seen previously in some of our spaces then started to go and gravitate, right? So, if there were Black individuals who at one point prior hung out in the Cross-Cultural Center, they now felt like—well, I don’t know if they felt like, but I would maybe see them upstairs now, right? I would have to go upstairs to connect with them versus before they would be just be right behind me, whether on couches or something like that. I could just say, “Hey, how’s it going?” and connect with them. So, that’s all part of the shift that I think that happened with student spaces, and where you feel comfortable, where you feel like you belong. And those are always dynamic, and they change, depending on the students when they come in and how they pass on orally (next few words are cut off) . . . students hang out. And then, all of a sudden you start to get some of these myths about where people should or shouldn’t be with regard to that.  Ford: So, can you tell me a little bit about the early focus of the Black Student Center’s programs, and different initiatives that they did during the day?  Lai: Yeah. What I recall—and, again, I wasn’t integral in the design, because Anthony Jett, the first director, really dictated a lot of that, but in my conversations with him there were a few themes that I recognized, right? One, I think, was leveraging the experience of the community in North County, which—I don’t think North County—Not to say that there aren’t Black communities, but it’s not predominantly an area regionally known for that. And so, part of it was establishing relationships. So, I want to say the NAACP has a chapter, I think, in North County or maybe in Vista or nearby. Mira Costa has centers or spaces. And so, Mira Costa does a Martin Luther King, Jr. Day of Service, right, for example, which at our campus we don’t do. We have Cesar Chavez, at the time. We do now. And so, there were—I think, Anthony, some of his first parts were really establishing those relationships because, again, there had not been a Black Student Center prior. And so, those relationships weren’t necessarily there, or the focus and taking the time to focus on those relationships weren’t necessarily there. I also think that, wherever possible, the director would try to help with recruitment. So, when we think about outreach on our campus, oftentimes these occur seventh, eighth grade, maybe high school. And so, he would spend a lot of his time either going to high school or conferences or fairs to try and let them know about the fact that there was a Black Student Center and that, yes, there are Black students and a Black community, even though it’s small, at Cal State San Marcos. It was establishing relationships with organizations like the NAACP or other institutions. It was really getting involved in the community. And that’s something, I think from what I observed, was something he spent a lot of his time doing, right? Secondary to that, and that’s where we often connected, was the programmatic nature of what was the focus and what was it going to look like. And he—and I’m forgetting what his affiliation is—but he was part of one of the Divine Nine. It may have been Omega Psi, Omega Phi? I haven’t been on campus, so my Greek is—Omega Psi Phi, I think it is, one of the Black fraternities. He himself was a member, so he built relationships, right, and brought on the fraternity and helped in those efforts, strengthened those pieces with regard to community, tried to have programming with students and work collaboratively with the Black Student Union. Student organizations, they ebb and flow (laugh) depending on who the leadership is. Sometimes, they’re really strong and sometimes people are busy and so there’s not a lot of traction. So, whatever the leadership was at the time, I think he tried to forge relationships with them as well. So yeah, I think those were the efforts. I think also knowing, and I shared with you early on, when I came on and there was no other Center and space, I primarily drove a lot of the History Months or the Heritage Months. And so, with the establishment of the Black Student Center now, there could be a focus. And that became their responsibility or purview to some degree, if they wanted to do programming or things like that and how they might be able to support community, create community, create opportunities for folks to gather. Those were all efforts that I think Black History Month, Black Excellence Month now, those are some of the programming efforts and focus that he was in charge of. I want to say he started in August, in the summer, so he had a really quick pivot time to try and get going because usually with planning like this, for any programming, a couple months in advance you want to be there. So, he was scrambling, not only trying to build those relationships, but also create some sort of programming that would work. So, we often would leverage and say, “Oh yeah. We’ve got this program. Let’s support one another,” or things like that, in helping to move that work forward and increasing the visibility of the Center and space.  Ford: Mm-hmm. So, current, and previously, have there been any collaborative efforts between the Cross-Cultural Center and the Black Student Center?  Lai: There have. I mentioned earlier, more recently, I would say we have looked at different ways to view those collaborations. So, first and foremost, the Cross-Cultural Center does a program called the Social Justice Summit which is a weekend retreat to talk about issues of social justice, to explore identity. How does that connect with the choices and decisions we make to look at power and privilege? And then, it’s a three-day conference, so by the last day of the summit/retreat, we are looking at what does that mean? How do we become an ally? So, all the Centers, including the Black Student Center once they came online, were all invited collaborators with that sort of social justice programming. It’s not only signature programs but it’s also a way that all of us intersect across our different programming areas. So, that’s definitely one area that I would say he was invited to. But again, he had so much on his plate, I don’t know if we were necessarily able to leverage that at the time when he first came onboard with the Black Student Center. Since then—and I’ll speak probably more recently and actually this is going to be tomorrow—we are doing a program tomorrow called Beyond Just Us: Empathy and Justice Across Communities, and that’s a collaboration with the Cross-Cultural Center and the Black Student Center. Now, that has also been a shift in our space. And I know we’re not talking about the Cross-Cultural Center, but we started to do more programming in the absence of an Asian Pacific Islander Desi American-dedicated space. And that’s not us. We have a lot of students who identify, that hang out in our space: Filipino, Chinese, otherwise. But, in the absence of an actual space, we’re doing programming because there’s still going to be a need for that. So, that’s a program defining diaspora, APIDA identities. That’s a program series we do within our space. And in light of the recent assaults and attacks on Asian American communities, and sometimes by perpetrators who were perceived as Black, we’ve seen an increase in the solidarity marches and/or the ways in which both of these communities have come together, right? And so, Chamorro (Cultural Festival) is an example of where we’re looking at what does that intersectionality look like between Asian and Black communities? What has that history been, right? In the description, we talk about this trope. I don’t know when you were born, Ayana, but I was in high school during the 1992 riots, Rodney King, when the policemen were acquitted and the aftermath of all that, or actually leading up to all that, right, what happened as a result of his beating. And at the time—again, so this goes back to your very first question about my lens and stuff in high school—that was probably another point, just looking at those relationships because I remember having arguments with my Korean friends like “Why are you going to L.A.?” I’m not anti-gun. I’m not a fan of having any firearms in general, right? That’s not for me to deal with. And I remember having heated conversations with them about why are you going to Korea Town. Just stay safe! And they’re like “No. This is our livelihood, so we need to protect ourselves.” Well, anyway, there was this trope. There was this “It’s Black against Asian,” right, because L.A., and then if you go to Korea Town, those are the businesses that were being looted or specifically targeted. And so, that trope has reemerged again, right? “Oh, these attacks against Asian American communities, they’re all perpetrated by Black people.” And so, there’s this thing where, again, looking at White supremacy in a broader context, things that I’m starting to learn more about now, that it’s pitting two different groups against one another rather than looking at the larger issues and systemic issues that are happening that are shared across both communities. And so, because of that, that’s what we’re going to be exploring a little bit tomorrow, right, is kind of demystifying that trope, recognizing where each of these communities have some commonality, where they can stand in solidarity, how we can feel like we can be empathetic but also be accountable, right, to those things, and the complicated histories, right? I talk about how Asian Americans can sometimes perpetuate that notion of anti-Blackness. So, what is our role in that, and then where does that apply when the perceived perpetrators are they themselves Black, right? It’s not about blaming but looking at the bigger picture. So, that’s just another more current example, yet to happen tomorrow, that we’re going to be putting on. And I look forward to possibly great relationships now with John being the current director and because of the structures that I mentioned earlier in our conversation, where we work more closely together than we have previously. We’re being able to see more opportunities to collaborate and to do some programming between the Black Student Center and the Cross-Cultural Center, and that it’s more targeted, right? Another one that didn’t happen this year but perhaps the next year—one thing that we do in the Cross-Cultural Center to differentiate ourselves from some of the other spaces is we have a focus on advocacy and activism. What does that look like? We’re not going to dictate, this is how you are an activist or not, (laughs) you’re an activist. But we do believe that I think students need to know about what are some models. What are some strategies? What are—you know, protests are important, and it definitely has a place in creating change. It’s not the only way to create change. It’s the most visible way, and I think oftentimes students and others conflate that if I’m going to be an activist, I have to be out on the streets. (laughs) And so, we’re trying to provide different venues and avenues for exploring what activism and advocacy looks like. Also, as a tangent—and this goes back, sort of connected—but I’ve been a part of my professional associations and I went to conferences, and one of the things that struck me was that when a lot of these Black Lives Matter protests were occurring, it was a student who was at Stanford. He was an engineer. He was a Black student. But he talked about “I go to these protests, and I got arrested. I wasn’t expecting to be arrested, but I got arrested. And then, the rest of the semester, I had to deal with going to court, working with my lawyer,” all these things that, in the moment, he hadn’t thought about necessarily, or maybe he thought about but he didn’t think it all the way through. And so, those were all things that caused me to think about “Okay, we need to do more to help educate our students so that it’s not like ‘Hey, come with me. We’re going to go do this.’” It’s more like “Okay. If you are going to go protest and you might get arrested, what are some practical things you should know about before you go there, right?” all those things. Anyway. So, having said that—that was a lot—we, as part of that program of the Activist Lab, which is another program series we do—we were going to explore the legacy of John Lewis. So, this year, in particular, the library has—their read is the book They Came for Us, by George Takei, which is a graphic novel, and the power of graphic novels. And so, March, the book by John Lewis, is a three-part book, talks and illustrates similarly and actually was inspiration, I believe, for the George Takei book, They Came for Us. So, we were going to work with the Black Student Center, going all the way back to your first question for that collaboration, of trying to do a book discussion about March, right? What was John Lewis’s legacy? How did he, at his young age, decide to do what he did when it came to protesting and sitting in diners where he wasn’t supposed to be? So, again, this was just through a lens of trying to understand strategies, looking at models or individuals who could be models of what activism looks like and how do they come to those decisions. But we needed to postpone that, but that’s another example of a program where we worked with the Black Student Center or will be working with the Black Student Center in identifying programmatic opportunities and connections. And there will continue to be opportunities because very much all of our work is very intersectional in nature. We all believe that I’m not just an Asian identified individual. I’m male. I’m heterosexual or straight, right? All those identities impact one another and sometimes they coincide with some of these other spaces like the LatinX Center or the Black Student Center.  Ford: Mm-hmm.  Lai: Yeah.  Ford: I look forward to hearing more about those programs.  Lai: Yeah. (laughs)  Ford: So, do you know why the Black Student Center was moved from Student Success to Student Life?  Lai: Yes. I think part of it was, again, a restructuring to leverage resources. I think there was—I won’t get too much into it, but I reported up to the Vice President of Student Affairs, Dr. Lorena Checa. However, we all reported differently to different supervisors. And so, that in and of itself causes—so, I may have a different focus or approach than Student Success has an approach, right? And so, we just had different ways in which we’re doing it— (reception starts to become very choppy)  Ford: Can you hold off one second? (seems to be trying to figure out how to improve reception)  Lai: —instead of going in three different directions, we feel like we’re all going in the same direction. Oh, sure.  Ford: So, why was the Black Student Center moved from the Student Success to Student Life?  Lai: Yes. My short answer would be that it was a leveraging of resources. Whereas reporting to three different associate vice presidents, by going to a singular associate vice president or supervisor, and then to the vice president of student affairs, we are in lockstep to some degree. We still have a lot of autonomy but we’re moving in the same direction, whereas before we may have been going in three different directions because we each had a supervisor who may have had a different approach or had a thought about what we should be prioritizing. Consolidating those efforts, in my estimation, has helped us to really focus in on what is it that collectively, all five of us, how do we tell our story? Where are there areas for overlap, collaboration, or opportunities that we previously connected with? And we want to collaborate. The campus, by nature, we just tend to be collaborative in general, but even more so now. We can leverage the fact that we all have the same supervisor, the same area. We all have a similar basic mission now around this notion of student life in moving forward. Now, Student Success is a part of Student Life. It all, again, overlaps in a lot of ways. But having a singular supervisor, in my estimation, helps us to move that more successfully and hopefully make bigger strides in progressing and moving our individual agendas or our approaches more effectively and efficiently.  Ford: Mm-hmm. Okay. So, what are some of the wrinkles that needed to be ironed out during the opening of the Center?  Lai: I think same as anyone else, how people could fit. Who’s going to fit? (chuckles) When we could have food, do we have enough food for everyone? How much is that going to cost? Are people going to come? Are they not going to come? How do we ensure success? What is success defined as? I think those are all part of the wrinkles. We all have a blueprint for what we hope will happen, but the wrinkles are really the details in trying to figure out what needs to happen, how to ensure that those things are happening. Those are some of the early ones, I think, more than anything. Just like any new Center or space, you’ve got to publicize. And it’s funny. You could be screaming from the top. You could have a million signs— (laughs)  Ford: Mm-hmm. (nods)  Lai: —on the door that tell you exactly what’s going on and you still will have people go “Oh, what’s this?” Right? Because people are just not in that frame of mind. And in the same vein, you could be screaming from the rooftops, “We have a Black Student Center!” and you’ll inevitably have a student that goes “Oh. I didn’t know that we had it.” (laughs) Getting yourself visible, letting folks know about it, helping them understand what the initial purpose is, who is it for? I heard stories, and these were probably from Black students, they’d be sitting there, and people would be walking and tiptoeing by the door. They’d look inside and they would keep walking, right? Like “Is this where I’m supposed to— Can I come in?” And these were also Black students, maybe even too, to some degree, right? So, just those experiences and hesitancies, I think, are all part of the wrinkles that were a part of that sort of opening to some degree. Our program as well, in the first year, we were trying to establish what is the . . . What are the needs of the students? How do I meet those needs and ensure that this is a place that they would want to come back to? Those are all wrinkles, I think, that I think early on needed to be worked . . . And why—all the more reason that any inaugural director has a huge burden to try and lift, right, when you’re the first of any (technical difficulties) because it’s freeing as there’s no precedent. It doesn’t feel like you have to step up to anything. But at the same time there’s no real benchmark either for what that’s like (technical difficulties) And so, those are all the wrinkles and things that people sorted through in the early days of the Black Student Center.  Ford: Mm-hmm. So, what do you feel like the main purpose of the creation of the Center was? I knew you went into a little bit of detail on that before, but in your opinion.  Lai: Yeah. I think that there is an acknowledgment and a desire that spaces like these can be helpful in supporting students in their efforts (technical difficulties) I feel like (technical difficulties) just as they need to be able to move forward. There are ways in which that can be manifest. There are different models. I came from a—I told you about the Cross-Cultural Center at UC Irvine where I did my undergrad and then eventually worked for a couple of years. They were established in the early ‘70s, but then higher education has gone through budget cuts and then sometimes it does well. So, there’s a lot of these cycles. And there was a moment in time where “We don’t have money. So, we’re going to consolidate everything. And then, we’ll have specialists,” right? And then, there’s other times where it’s like they see it’s a dedicated space, right? And so, I think we go through cycles like that. And so, I think regardless of the efforts that I may have tried to do or contribute, either in supporting the student organization, I wasn’t Black, you know. And that’s not a dig and saying that you have to be in order to. I just didn’t really have that perspective or experience. And so, I think there was a need to have a Center or a space dedicated, especially in light of Black Lives Matter and a lot of these things that are issues that are more complex and complicated that I think require those people to be able to—And even then (next few words unintelligible due to reception) that’s of value for any particular challenge. So, I think there’s that. There was the fact that students wanted it, right? And there was a desire for that. And so, we want to support students in those efforts. But we also want to make sure that students are doing it thoughtfully and not, as I said, just because they want a space. They need to be able to justify why. And I think they were able to articulate that there was a need. So, to me, that’s the reason why I think a Black Student Center needed to exist. There was not enough programming or attention being paid to the issues that the Black community needed to address at Cal State San Marcos. And so, the Black Student Center helped to fill that void to some degree (technical difficulties) individuals who focused their specifically on the needs of the Black community and how to move those efforts forward.  Ford: Mm-hmm. So, do you think that purpose has been accomplished?  Lai: I think it’s in process. I think that we’re moving in the right direction. I believe so. I think all those things I mentioned about our students coming, how do we generate those. Because students come every year, right, and cycle through every four years, in a lot of ways because people that are coming in don’t always have the context or the history. And so, I think it can feel repetitive but for the student who has never been there, it’s the first time they’re hearing this information and what the purpose of the Black Student Center might be. And so, to your question, yes, they are accomplishing it. I feel like they’re moving in that direction. I think that they’re building community. I feel like we’re there tackling and connecting with spaces like mine across (technical difficulties) the Cross-Cultural Center (technical difficulties) to really (technical difficulties) because there are so many (technical difficulties) you know, or if you are Black from Africa versus Black in the United States. All of those things I think are part of that direction and effort of what the Black Student Center is trying to accomplish. And so, I believe, yes, they are moving in the right direction, and there’s always going to be opportunities to do better. But I feel confident that they’re making strides. The fact that we get a chance to talk about the oral history and talking about the history of the Center is a positive step in the right direction, to acknowledge its origins and also perspective on what its impact has been on Cal State San Marcos. And, for me, that means that if you have the ability to go back and reflect, that means you kind of have a good . . . because early on, it’s hard to know where you want to go when you don’t know where you’ve been, is something I learned from a mentor. And so, history, context has been such a part of my own professional development. And so, I was excited and why I was “Oh, yeah. I want to sign up. I want to be a part of this project,” because these pieces are helpful for future generations to understand what it was, why it was created, why it should be continued or why I think they should continue to fight for its existence in the future, regardless of whatever may happen in the future.  Ford: So, how did the Black Student Center opening impact you personally?  Lai: I was excited for it. I think I could see individuals, as I mentioned, who maybe hung out in our spaces prior really excited and really happy that they had a space that they felt like they could call their own, right? Again, not to say they couldn’t come downstairs and hang out in the Cross-Cultural Center, but a space that they feel like they had a connection to. Very much like when I shared with you my own personal experience with (technical difficulties) race formational center because I was going through this sort of with my own identity development. I saw very much in them what I saw in myself many, many years ago at UC Irvine, that they felt like they had a place that they felt a direct connection to. It wasn’t necessarily transactional. It wasn’t like “I’m just here to use the computer.” It was a space where they could go and they could find community, where they could be themselves. And I didn’t say this but where you could go and be yourself without having to explain yourself to anyone else, if that makes sense, right? (technical difficulties) a lot of places where there’s a lot of diverse people and then people ask you questions and you’re like “Okay. I’ve got to talk about that again,” versus you go to spaces like a Black Student Center if you’re Black in particular, and people just get you, right? There’s not a what? Why? What? You know, it’s just they get you. So, I think I saw that energy being—and I still see it now, right, with the students that decide or choose to be a part of those spaces. And so, that’s kind of (technical difficulties), that I’ve observed and seen. Anytime there’s a new space that is focused on the wellbeing and success of student populations, particularly those that are marginalized, I think I’ve come to appreciate and be optimistic that those spaces can serve a greater purpose, right, and how they can help students in their own personal development much like the Cross-Cultural Center did for me when I was at UC  Irvine.  Ford: So, with how everything is, what would you expect next to see from the Black Student Center?  Lai: That’s a great question. That’s a John (Rawlins III), the director, question. I guess what I would hope to see is opportunities to engage in broader conversations, right, of what Blackness looks like in the many other spaces or other communities. I would love to see a large number of students get (technical difficulties) and come into Cal State San Marcos as their first choice, not necessarily just because there’s a Black Student Center, but because there’s a sense that the Cal State San Marcos campus is dedicated to Black excellence, is dedicated to the success of students, and it’s demonstrated because the students have this. It’s one of multiple pieces, right? But it can play an integral piece in the cocurricular experience that students have. I’m in Student Affairs and what that means is that I look at the co-curriculum, what happens outside of the classroom. There’s a lot that happens inside the classroom, but I often believe that if they have a great experience outside of the classroom, those narratives, those anecdotes, those stories supplement what they learn in the classroom, right? There’s this theory. How does this thing—? You’re like, “Well, I have experienced that. Can I translate that into better experiences?” So, it’s the cycle and there is some reciprocity. What happens inside the classroom, what happens outside the classroom, there’s a symbiotic relationship. And so, I look forward to a time when the Black Student Center can continue to play a critical role in those efforts for our Black students at Cal State San Marcos. I guess long term, and optimistically, I hope that like “Oh my gosh. They got an amazing Black Student Center at Cal State San Marcos.” And so, that definitely is going to be the reason why I want to be able to go there, right? They’ve got some amazing programs or initiatives that are unique or novel. They look at it a little bit differently. They’re very creative, right? That you wouldn’t necessarily (technical difficulties) I think those are things that I look forward to, right? I’m also aware of the fact that our current structure—John is the only director (chuckles) ;  there’s a lot of us who help—that it's not his burden to bear alone, if that makes sense, right? Just like when we talk about issues of diversity or issues of inclusive excellence, it’s not just a diversity people. It’s not the people of color’s responsibility alone. Everyone has to play a role. And so, in that same vein, the Black Student Center’s success will also hinge on my ability to provide and support them and help them to be successful in my own contributions, whether it’s being a part of this, finding ways to assist them and help them in their efforts, defending them when necessary, when people go “Why do we need a Black Student Center?” and helping to foster and build a stronger community together.  Ford: So, are there any other questions that I haven’t asked that I could or which you want to add or anything else?  Lai: No. It was pretty thorough. I was curious because as I was hearing about the oral history project, I know we talked about it. I said, “Okay, you want to send me the questions?” And you’re like “Oh, no. It’s just going to be a conversation.” So, I had no idea what the questions are going to be. And so, I was like “Why do they care what my childhood was like?” (both laugh) Because this is for the Black Student Center Oral History Project. But I appreciate those questions, and--and motivations, right, for my connection to the Black Student Center. In my self defense, I am someone or co-conspirator to some degree, someone who wants to create positive change in the community. I’m still doing the work every day and trying to figure out what I could do better each time, what to do differently, right, in a way that hopefully is helpful. I still learn from John, the director, and help support him. So, yeah. So, thank you so much—  Ford: Thank you so much for letting me interview you. That was a wonderful—  Lai: —for the opportunity. (I don’t have) anything else to add other than yeah, for the opportunity to share with you and to get to know you better, or at least partially, right? (both laugh)  Ford: Thank you so much.  Lai: Of course, Ayana. I think that’s it for me, right? Is there any other questions or no?  Ford: No.  Lai: We’re good?  Ford: Yeah.  Lai: Okay.             https://rightsstatements.org/page/InC/1.0/?language=en       video      Property rights reside with the university. Copyrights are retained by the creators of the records and their heirs. This resource is licensed for noncommercial educational use using CC NC-BY 4.0. Please contact Special Collections at archives</text>
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                    <text>LAI, FLOYD

TRANSCRIPT, INTERVIEW
2021-04-19

Ayana Ford: So, today is Monday, April 19th, 2021, at 1:02 p.m. I am Ayana Ford, a student at
San Marcos and today I’m interviewing Floyd Lai for the Black Student Center Oral History
Project, a collaboration between CSUSM Black Student Center and the CSUSM University
Library Special Collections. Mr. Lai, thank you for being here with me today.
Floyd Lai: Pleasure. Thank you, Ayana.
Ford: I’d like to start by talking about your childhood a little bit. When and where were you
born?
Lai: I was born on the island of Oahu in Kahuku in Hawaii, and that was in 1974.
Ford: Can you tell me a little bit about your childhood?
Lai: Sure. My parents are immigrants, originally from Taiwan. I am the oldest of three sons,
three boys. We moved around. My parents initially settled in Hawaii, and then we moved to
Idaho, and then eventually to southern California by the time I was six. I have lived in California
since about 1980, so pretty much consider myself a native in the sense of being in southern
California for the majority of my lifetime. And I would say it was a pretty ordinary, I guess,
childhood in the sense that, again, being the oldest of three boys, there were obviously some
cultural components in the roles and responsibilities of what that entailed, being the eldest. I also
had responsibility over my two younger brothers as well, just with regard to how we were
growing up, and it was pretty common as far as an immigrant experience, keeping in mind both
of my parents worked. And I think, at an early age, I—there’s a term that was called, not
necessarily pejorative but it was a latch key kid. So, I had a key around my neck so that when I
would walk home from school, I’d be able to get inside the house, and pretty much had
responsibility for my brothers from an early age as well.
Ford: I know that. I’m the youngest, so— [both laugh] So, how did that help you come to an
understanding of your culture at all? How did your childhood help you come to understand your
culture?
Lai: Yeah. You know, I would say it was a part of my upbringing in the sense that it guided and
dictated—and it was just par for the course, meaning that outside of any influence or education
about some of the histories that we learn about at school, it was just part of my upbringing, right?
So, being from a Chinese immigrant family, eating Chinese food, right? [chuckles] Everything
was just taken as something that was innate and part of the way in which I was raised. I would
say that the first instance that I recognized or noticed that perhaps I was different from others
was probably not until my middle school years, in the sense that I think first through sixth in
elementary school, the community in which I grew up—I grew up in Rowland Heights,
California, which is in Los Angeles County. At the time, it was relatively pretty diverse, but I
think the friends that I had were of different backgrounds, different ethnicities, different races.
And as time progressed and if you were to go back to that community now, there has been a huge
influx of immigration, particularly from China and Taiwan because of institutions, like there’s a
large Buddhist temple in the adjoining city in Hacienda Heights, and we’ve seen some of the
demographic shifts and changes. So, growing up in middle school was probably where I started
noticing and gravitating towards individuals who were much like myself, who were also of Asian
background or identity or descent. I was on the seventh grade, eighth grade basketball team. And
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TRANSCRIPT, INTERVIEW
2021-04-19

so, I would say that probably was my first introduction to other races, like Black individuals or
Mexicans or Latinos at the time. But I didn’t necessarily have a good understanding of the
differences when it came to race and ethnicity until very much later, probably not until I
graduated from high school and got into college and started taking classes and/or having
discussions about that.
Ford: So, to follow up on that, during your childhood and adolescence, were you taught about
Black history and the Black community?
Lai: You know, the extent of that probably was Martin Luther King, Jr., right?; Black History
month, limited to just the month of February. My earliest recollection—I think I may have done
research on George Washington Carver, right? Learning about, I think it was peanut butter or a
lot of, I think, the stories and notions of Black history that was primarily in our history books,
right? And it was all the positive portrayals, right, or images of things and people, right?
Obviously, since then and more recently with different projects like, I’m blanking. Is it the 1692
Project or things that are in the media now that talk about slavery and other things, right? My
recollection of that when I was in elementary, middle, or even high school was maybe a short
chapter, if that, on slavery and the Civil War, but never necessarily through a Black lens or a
portrayal beyond just the significant notables like Martin Luther King, Jr., maybe some
musicians, Louis Armstrong, things that we would hear about or note, but there was never an
extended conversation about that. I played basketball, as I mentioned, in seventh and eighth
grades. So, I knew Black students or teammates of mine. We didn’t necessarily hang out. We just
played our basketball games and whatnot. But that was really the extent of it. So, we played
basketball on the same team, but then beyond that, our circles didn’t necessarily overlap, one
with another.
Ford: So, after you came to San Marcos, how did that change? Prior to your coming here to San
Marcos.
Lai: Yeah. Coming to San Marcos as a staff member, I’ve had more—I’ve been out here at Cal
State San Marcos for the last ten years. Prior to that, I worked at UC Irvine for about six years.
And then, even before that, I graduated in 2000 from undergraduate, UC Irvine as well. That’s
where I did my undergraduate program in environmental engineering. So, I was on a track or
trajectory to go into engineering, in the engineering field. My first notion, I think in a broader
sense, was in my undergraduate experience at UC Irvine. Well, so from a personal experience as
an Asian American, Chinese American man, I have shared this story with others when I do
workshops and presentations. But my first introduction to a personal impact was—I forget the
year. I want to say 1995 or ‘6, per se. I was the recipient, on the receiving end at the time, of a
hate incident through email. So, myself and others, back in the day—this is when the internet
was still [laughs] kind of coming out—you had to go to a lab to jump on and connect. And there
were localized areas and whatnot. But I received an email essentially saying, “I’m going to kill
all you eff’in Asians. You ruin the curve,” things like that, that really started me on a trajectory
and path to really be more reflective about my own personal identity as a Chinese, Asian
American man. You know, “I just got this. What is this? Not sure,” you know. Come to find out
later on, it was a student who obviously felt the need or desire to broadcast this message, this
hateful message, to whomever was in the lab at the time. And the way he identified folks was if
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2021-04-19

they had an Asian sort of sounding last name. And those that were there, myself included, were
the lucky recipients of that. So, that started me on a trajectory, just kind of where I am today. I
mean I think that would be a critical, pivotal point in the work that I do within multicultural
affairs, and doing the work that I do in the Cross-Cultural Center. It was a personal moment
where I started thinking why was I the recipient? What caused this, right? To think about issues
in terms of race. And it’s through that soul searching and connections to the Cross-Cultural
Center at UC Irvine that I got involved. Then I said I wanted to explore that a little bit more. I
was involved in various clubs. I was part of the Hawaii club. I’m not myself native Hawaiian, but
it was something. I was born there, and it was something that I gravitated towards. And it was
through those interactions that I started getting involved and going to programming with the
Cross-Cultural Center at that space and Center, which I eventually got to work at prior to coming
here to Cal State San Marcos, when I worked there for about six years. I got introduced to the
Black Student Union, right? MECHA which is a student organization that often helps to—We
call them umbrella organizations. They are the political, social wing of the experiences at UC
Irvine at the time: Asian Pacific Student Association; again, these larger groupings. And so, I
worked at the Center as a volunteer initially, then as an intern, and then I was involved in a
program called REACH. They’ve changed their name since, but it was called Reaffirming Ethnic
Awareness, Community, Harmony. So, I learned about workshops. I got really deeply involved
in understanding, for example, the different experiences within the various communities, whether
it was the Asian community, the Black community, the LatinX community—LatinX wasn’t a
term at the time, right—so, the Latino community, and the different sort of experiences. I would
say also during that time at UC Irvine was the first time I took an Asian—So, I was an engineer.
So, that was my trajectory and pathway. It’s very fixed. You can’t deviate too much, right?
Ford: Yeah.
Lai: You know, you’ve got your sciences classes. You’ve got your engineering classes. But, on
occasion, I had the ability to take some of electives. And so, one of the electives I chose was an
Asian American Studies class which was helpful for me, as well, as I was just trying to get into
and understanding of some of those issues and areas. So, between my experience at the CrossCultural Center at UC Irvine, some of the classes I was able to take, the interactions that I had,
obviously hanging out at the Cross-Cultural Center at UC Irvine, I got to meet the leaders of the
Black Student Union from the American Indian Student Association. These were folks that I was
able to run in circles or I would see on a regular basis. They had retreats and other opportunities
for student leadership exposure. And so, that’s where I was able to expand and grow my
experience. And at the time I wasn’t sure if I was going into the field of higher education that I
am in now. It was just something that was supplementary to understanding some of those things
at that time in my own personal development, of my own identity, and in relation to other people.
Ford: So, as you mentioned before, you had talked a little bit about how the different movements
were. How has Black social justice and activism such as Civil Rights Movement, Feminism, and
Black Lives Matter Movement affected you?
Lai: Yeah. I would say that’s a more recent, and I would say it’s an ongoing, evolutionary
progression for me, right? Let me start more recently and maybe work backward. I would say
this past summer, last summer, with George Floyd—And, again, he was not the first and nor was
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he the last, as we’ve seen more recently with the continued impacts of anti-Black racism
occurring. I would say, however though, that that coupled with the pandemic and other things,
right, I think galvanized. And we saw our country and nation as a whole get to a turning point,
right? And so, that’s something that I would say is the strong notion of anti-racism, of anti-Black
racism particularly, and how it’s situated within the context of my understanding of racism and
discrimination broadly, was really galvanized there. The Black Lives Matter Movement I know
occurred a couple of years earlier, right, with Ferguson and some of those things. So, there has
been a steady, I think, beat in my own personal understanding in history of the Black experience
and where I fit and situate, right? I often felt as if I was a bystander to some degree, someone
who’s looking outside looking in and trying to understand but, obviously, not recognizing those
experiences personally. And there’s a certain level of privilege in that too, right? So, because I’m
not Black and I don’t have to go through some of those things, I have the luxury of not having to
worry about those things, right? So, yes, it’s horrible. Yes, it’s awful. And I felt a lot of empathy
for situations and crises like this. And why does this continue to occur? But I would say that,
going back to George Floyd, that was a pivotal point in my own personal experience in
recognizing—one, because I mean my first name is Floyd, so it was weird hearing so-and-so was
on the neck of Floyd. And so, there was this kind of weird connection as well, because his last
name just happens to be my first name. And so, there was almost this personal connection now
because I would see Floyd in narratives and things like that about the experiences with police.
And so, it was very personalizing in that way. So, I think that, and then going back to Black
Lives Matter, I would say my background and trajectory and pathway, especially in this field of
social justice work, I was never—compared to probably some of my colleagues—I was never a
super activist, right? I wasn’t out there chanting or demonstrating. There were a few times I was
part of marches or walks, but nothing that felt very heavily involved. Part of the reason why is
because I think, also personally, my purpose was I’m going to get an engineering degree. This is
all nice but that’s not my focus. And then, as I came to my own sort of personal consciousness
and awakening myself, I started to see how education could be an opportunity to better
understand. And I felt like I could have an impact on things as well, right? Personally, and
professionally, in a lot of ways. So, going back to your initial question, I think those experiences
have continued to evolve for me. I think there are better nuances in the sense—or better is not the
right word. I have more nuance in understanding that experience and how I fit into that, right?
This last summer, there is more of a commitment. Now, anytime we make a commitment or a
desire to change, we always have to check ourselves to see if we’re still in that same frame of
mind. But I have a stronger commitment to trying to dismantle anti-Blackness and try to
dismantle racist notions. And even more so now, going back to my identity as an Asian
American, in what ways does my own culture and my own upbringing, does my own lens, as an
Asian American, help to contribute to some of that, right? I was having a conversation with some
colleagues of mine and thinking back, when I was younger, going back to that kind of thing,
there was this rule about who I was able to date. Right? Who would be acceptable to date? So,
obviously, my parents are Chinese. So, if you can find someone, and I identify as heterosexual,
so if you find a nice Chinese girl, right, that’s at the top of the list, if you can find someone that
you want to date. And at the bottom of the list, right, was someone who was more darkcomplected or Black, right? That was not in my wheelhouse or realm. And so, a lot of that
sentiment that seemingly is innocuous—I mean, my parents are immigrants and so this notion,
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right, coming from Taiwan where there’s not a lot of people of color, right? They’re mostly
Chinese or indigenous individuals but there were still notions of colorism, right? The darker the
skin, don’t be out in the sun too much because not only is it bad for you but also you don’t want
to be too dark-complected. So, a lot of those things that I took, I viewed different then, I look at
now in the lens of how that can contribute to notions of anti-Blackness, right, and what that role
looks like. And then, I’m a father of two young girls. And so, what is now my role as someone
who can influence, particularly those in my own family, what those thoughts and ideas look like?
How do I have and hold conversations with my children and social media, everything. Compared
to when I was younger, you had to read the newspaper, watch television. There were only three
news channels, right? Cable was satellite media, as I was getting a little bit older. So, there were
only so many sources of news. Now, there are so many places where you can get information.
And so, how do I structure those conversations or perhaps take opportunities to have
conversations with them about these diverse issues, racially, or around sexual orientation, around
gender, right? And I’ve been surprised. I mean, a lot of them have been reading books that have
exposed them to a lot of concepts that I probably wouldn’t have been reading prior, because the
authors weren’t writing about those topics, right, about gender fluidity or any of those things.
They’re much more comfortable in using that language than I was at their age, at that time. I
don’t know if I answered your question? It’s kind of long-winded. But those are just, I mean, just
some initial thoughts about some of those movements and around social justice in general.
Ford: Mm-hmm. You answered the question perfectly. Thank you. [chuckles]
Lai: Okay.
Ford: So, what role did you play in the creation of the Black Student Center?
Lai: Yeah. Other than perhaps a cheerleading role on the sidelines—So, I’ll give you a little bit
of history, just also for the purposes of this recording. You know, the Cross-Cultural Center is—
not was, but is the first established now what’s called the Student Life Center. So, we were
established in 2003. So, at the time, with no other Centers or spaces, we kind of had to do
everything. And again, this wasn’t me. It was my predecessors, right? And so, once the CrossCultural Center—I think soon thereafter it was the Women’s Center, now currently called the
Gender Equity Center, Pride Center. And then there was a huge gap, and probably within the last
5-7 years, the LatinX Center, and then most recently, the Black Student Center. So, my role has
been as sort of a cheerleader of it. We had a student who worked as student staff. Her name is
Chanel Bradley. She’s an alum of Cal State San Marcos. She revived the Black Student Union,
BSU, during her time here. And she worked with Robert Aiello-Hauser who is the director of the
LGBTQA Pride Center in a lot of those things. At the time, there were just the three: the
Women’s Center, the Cross-Cultural Center, and the LGBTQA Pride Center. So, when I came in
2011, we overlapped. Chanel was I think in her second to last or last year, right? So, she was
involved in developing. And since there wasn’t a Black Student Center at the time, I was sort of
the support mechanism, right, along with some of the other Centers in providing support for the
Black students. So, we played roles in supporting them programmatically, trying to work with
them. If you were to come in person to the Cross-Cultural Center, I helped to develop things like,
at the time when it was called Black History month, now it’s called Black Excellence month, but
Black History month. And in my early couple of years being on campus, I was focused on how
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do we create space to celebrate or to discuss and talk about these issues. [starts to adjust his
chair. Both laugh.] I’m sorry. My chair keeps sinking and I’m not doing anything, and so I keep
having to adjust. So, my role was really more advisory, if that. Trying to play a support role.
Trying to support our students. This is even before the establishment or the creation of a Black
Student Center. I would say, then, after that, I still continued to have relationships supporting the
Black Student Union. At the time, the Cross-Cultural Center was a subset of what was known
then as the Student Life and Leadership or SLL. And SLL, now called the Student Leadership
and Evolvement Center or SLEC, was in charge of student organizations. So, I as the CrossCultural Center, had responsibility over some of the student cultural organizations, of which
BSU was one. And so, that was where my relationship continued to build with them, trying to
support them, do leadership, trying to support the students who were a part of that. Around that
time, as the LatinX Center got some momentum and eventually was established, right, there were
students in the Black Student Union who said, “Hey.” The argument one could say is, for the
LatinX Center, the population at campus was almost 50%—it was pretty high—that identified as
Hispanic or LatinX or Latino. And so, there was a need for resources and support. On the other
side of the spectrum, and this is not to take away from Native American or American Indian
students, Indigenous students, the second lowest were Black students, I think hovering around 23%. And so, students at the time had expressed an interest and desire to say, “We need a space
too because there’s not enough of us.” It was not so much because there’s so many, but it was a
lack of visibility and a lack of resources to recruit. And I came to learn later on, it was an issue
with some of the reputation of the area, right, whether or not it’s a welcoming and inviting space,
whether or not there was a critical mass of faculty or staff so students would feel like, yes, I want
to come to Cal State San Marcos. So, my role was very much tangential, was very much on the
outsides trying to support it, recognizing that students needed additional resources and support in
order to be able to provide them a space to congregate, a space to be able to discuss about issues
that are specific to the Black community. BSU did that, right, to some degree. It just wasn’t
necessarily as organized or had the resources and the staffing and the dedicated time that I think
John, the current director John, is able to put forth in helping to support that community, right?
And so, that’s the extent off my experience in relation to the creation and establishment of the
Center. It was truly student developed and student driven. They organized and decided that they
wanted to create a space. They were going to go and make a demand to the president, President
Haynes at the time, and were strategic about when and how to demand or ask, right, [chuckles]
strategically about the need for this. And I would say President Haynes, at the time, I think it—I
wouldn’t say caught her off guard. I think it was very impactful because now she was on the spot
and she could also challenge them and say, “Okay. What are the needs? Tell me what you need.
Draft a proposal.” So, she put it right back to the students. And so, the students then went to
work and they said, “Okay. This is what needs to happen.” And then, with support from faculty
and staff, the Black Student Center was eventually established here at Cal State San Marcos.
Ford: So, you helped support everyone. [chuckles]
Lai: Yeah. Yeah.
Ford: So, what did the student staff involved in the creation of the Black Student Center feel like
they needed directly? I know you went into a little detail about it, but is there anything?
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Lai: Yeah. I’m very aware and I’ve actually shared with student activists, I say I’m here to
support but I’m also part of the institution. [laughs] So, I think they were savvy enough to know
like okay, I can only share this much with Floyd. So, I don’t know all the details of the thing.
What I recall though was some of the things that I shared with you, that there was a lack of
visibility for Black students and therefore there was a sort of spiral effect because at least the
argument at the time was if I don’t see people like myself or other Black students, why do I want
to come here to Cal State San Marcos? There’s no place for me to feel like I belong. So, a sense
of belonging was one. A sense of programming that was dedicated. I shared with you, prior to
that, I put together a Black History Month event about being Black in America and we kind of
cobbled together some programming that would talk about those issues. But I wasn’t Black,
right? So, I relied heavily on Black faculty or staff or even the students, to come up with ideas
and concepts that could speak to that experience. But again, I was from an outsider view. I’m not
Black and I don’t have that experience so I can’t speak to it. And, probably, this is just my take
on it, there’s not a sense of authenticity or even—credibility is not the right word, but just
authority as a Black individual to say this is what we need. I was kind of like “Hey. How can we
help put this together programmatically so that there’s some visibility.” But I wasn’t—again, not
being Black myself. So, I think that was another piece, seeing some additional programming that
spoke to the community as opposed to from an outsider lens trying to see and fill a void that was
there. I think there was also a desire for just a space. I mean, I think that’s where it always stems
from. And I’m very cautious too, because I think any time you advocate for a Center or a space,
if your only argument is we need a space, okay, well what’s that space supposed to do? Because
there is strength, obviously, in numbers. But you could hang out in the dining hall. You can hang
out outside and carve out your own space. So, what is the need for a Center? And so, I think they
wanted to look at resources, ways in which tied to student success, to graduation rates. So, those
are some things that I think eventually made it into the initial proposal and/or if not part of the
demands into the proposal. And, you know, I think students had a lot of support from faculty and
staff, as far as hearing their concerns and then being able to articulate that in a way to eventually
formulate the initial plans for the movement towards an establishment of the Black Student
Center on campus.
Ford: So, what did you think the university administration communicated was their vision for the
Black Student Center?
Lai: I think they communicated that there was a desire to have it. I don’t know if they necessarily
dictated what it was going to be. In my experience, to some degree, I think that as an
administrator you’re looking at every piece, right? Where is it going to be? I mean, just because
the president of an institution or a university says “Yes, it’s going to happen” doesn’t mean all
the answers are … [next few words unintelligible due to poor reception] Yes, it’s going to
happen. Now figure out how it’s going to work. . . . I think there was a commitment or a desire to
meet the students, what they’re wanting to have. And I’ll be the first to say I think students have
a lot of power, more so than they often think, when it comes to political will and capital
because—And not to say that just because you could do it, you should. But because there’s the
desire there, they articulated a good reason for why there was a need for a Black Student Center
that was compelling enough that I think that the institution said “Okay. We’re going to do that.”
Right? And so, the commitment was yes, we’re dedicated to this. It’s one of our values. Now,
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whether or not and there’s going to be personalities and histories of whether or not you believe
what the president is saying or doesn’t say or the rest of the administration, there was definitely a
commitment though on the heels of a LatinX Center being established, that there was the need
because these two populations, both the Brown and Black populations, had different systemic
issues, right? Whether it was retention as I mentioned earlier, or student success when it came to
graduation rates, there was a desire. And so, both of these Centers actually stemmed or started
from a—and this gets too much into the nitty gritty, but they came up through Student Academic
Support Services. And so, their focus was primarily on student success. Whereas for me, in the
Cross-Cultural Center, Gender Equity Center, and Pride Center, we all came up through different
ways. The Gender Equity and Pride Center or Women’s Center came up through Associated
Students. And so, it was very much student driven, student funded, right? That was funding
stream. The Cross-Cultural Center was established under Student Life, under this engagement in
student activities, that kind of thing. And the Black Student Center, LatinX Center, came under
Student Academic Support Services. Now, they all overlap in a lot of ways, but it was very
targeted, right? When you think of Student Academic Support, you’re thinking testing materials,
time management, skills that were necessary for student success. And so, I think those were
some elements that there was a dedication to, right, by the institution, by the university. So, we
want these spaces to fall under this area because we want to increase the student success of both
Black communities as well as Latino communities. So, I think that was what was communicated
and conveyed by the institution. The rest of the details were left up to the person in charge at the
time, right, to develop and see through what that would look like. Currently—and I would say
this is more recently—my current supervisor, the Associate Vice President of Student Life, Dr.
Gail Cole-Avant—she came on probably around the same time, no, about a year or two after the
Black Student Center. So, prior to that, we all reported to different people. And so, that also
meant that there was different focus and different priorities for each of our spaces. And so, this
reorganization with the Vice President of Student Affairs, Dr. Checa, to combine and create this
new space where all the Centers were consolidated as a result of some external reviews was, I
think, in a good way the university saying, “We need to do better. And this is our way to make
sure that we are all aligned in moving forward,” because it kind of felt like we were going in
three different directions, right, because ASI, Student Government, they have an agenda, a
mission, a focus. My area around student leadership and student life is different. And then Black
Student Center and the LatinX Center around student success and academics. So, they’re kind of
different. They definitely overlap but they’re on different trajectories. By bringing them together,
I think the institution is also saying that there’s a commitment to doing better, to moving towards
success in aligning the resources, helping. We all support one another. We’re all staffs of one, to
a certain degree. We rely heavily on graduate assistants and undergraduate students who work in
our spaces. So, us leveraging and supporting one another I think provided a pathway to be able to
move forward in a way that perhaps the Black Student Center wasn’t able to do prior.
Ford: So, do you know of any pushback, internal or external, against the opening of the Black
Student Center?
Lai: You know, I think with any creation of new space where resources are being allocated, there
are always going to be detractors and individuals who feel like is this the best use of our
resources, right? I would say, from my lens where I was situated, there was not necessarily so
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much pushback per se as much as it was trying to understand what the purposes were, right? We
knew we could have a Black Student Center. I was actually—just as far as my connection to the
Center and I forgot about this—I was on the committee that selected the first director, right, or
was invited to be a part of that. So, we knew at the time that the director was really going to set
the stage, especially being the inaugural director for a brand-new space. This individual would
have to articulate the vision; would be able to link and connect with those that were on campus,
both those that support it and perhaps even those that didn’t; and be able to pool those resources
together; more importantly—and I think this was probably the priority—really build a rapport
and a relationship with students, right, and student organizations because even if you build it, if
they don’t come, then, you know—. So, you really need to help to let students know what is the
purpose, why is it here, why it’s important, and to build those relationships. So, I would say that
that was where our focus was. Outside of that, I don’t think that I was aware of. I wasn’t
involved in any particular pushback. Was there? I’m sure there was, right? Others that may have
said, I think—and it’s the same sort of trope—White students, and I use that broadly, right? But
where is our White Center, right, because if you’ve got a LatinX Center, you’ve got a Black
Student Center, where is the White Center? So, a lot of these things started coming through
perhaps, right? Again, those were often funneled through the Office of Inclusive Excellence at
the time. And so, I wasn’t necessarily a part of those sort of conversations or comments. But I
will say that once a Center is established, then you start to get “Well, what about us? What about
our Center? Where’s the Middle Eastern Center? Or where’s the Muslim Center, right, where we
can pray? What about the Asian American Center, APIDA Center? What about the Jewish
Center for the Jewish students on campus?” And so, I think it’s not so much pushback but it’s
more of the “What about us now? What now?” Now that we’ve started this precedent, what does
that mean? And so, I think there may have been obviously some conversations and discussions,
maybe even some disagreements around that approach as well. But, beyond that, I didn’t
necessarily hear any specific pushback to that because I think students had done a good job in I
think articulating it. They had worked really closely with faculty. And also, the Black Faculty
and Staff Association, they really helped to drive that home. So, I think, collectively, there was a
desire to see that this would be successful.
Ford: Mm-hmm. So, speaking of the opening, were you able to attend the grand opening?
Lai: I try to remember. [laughs] That was a couple of years ago. I think I was in the back. And I
don’t remember what year you are in school. Have you been? It’s on the 4th floor—
Ford: Yeah, I’ve been. [chuckles] Yeah.
Lai: —which is right by the stairwell. There’s not a lot of space and room in general, right?
Ford: Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Lai: So, I think it was up there. They did a ribbon cutting ceremony up there. I recall being kind
of in the back [indicates behind him with both arms] because there’s only so much space you can
have, right, in front, of where it was. And that’s my recollection because I think there was a
photo that I saw on a website way back when, when it was first established, or there may still be
one in the archival footage, of the first director and then also with President Haynes doing some
ribbon cutting and ceremonial things with the Center. But, after that, the first, his name was
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Anthony Jett. I, along with some of the other directors for the Centers, we all collaboratively
work together. And so, I would have opportunities, right, to connect with the first director in
trying to figure out programmatically different ideas, different approaches, and ways to look at
the situation and how we can ensure the success of the Center.
Ford: Mm-hmm. So, how did it feel the first time you visited the Center? You have any [last
word unintelligible]
Lai: Yeah. Well, so I’ve been here long enough that, you know, that space prior—there was
some work that had to be done. That used to be the meditation stress-free zone, I guess. It was
meant to be a prayer space, initially. So, it has undergone some renovation. But if you ever go up
to the bathroom that’s right there as well—because there used to be a display case—and so they
had removed it and created space so the folks could actually access it. There’s a gender-neutral
bathroom or single stall use bathroom up there. But you’ll notice it’s different from others
because there’s actually a—oh, I’m forgetting what the Islamic term is for it—but a wash station.
So, you can sit. And so, the intent was that for those, particularly those, of our Muslim faith that
we had a dedicated space for spirituality, prayer. Sometimes, it was a nap space, right, but for
meditation. So, it was converted from that. And so, it’s right above the Cross-Cultural Center
when you look at the specs. They did a really great job with the small amount of space that was
there, right? I would say also, too—and being all transparent as well—having a space is
important. Where the space is located is also important. So, we ran out of room on the 3 rd floor.
There was no other way to chop up. The LatinX Center got wedged in between the CrossCultural Center and the Gender Equity Center. It used to be called the Social Justice—It was
meant to be a training space, and they made [words cut off. Maybe “it into”?] the LatinX Center,
right? And in the same vein, we can’t have a Black Student Center halfway across the campus. It
has to all be in the same space, but we ran out of room. So, it’s on the 4th floor. And so, the fact
that they converted it, I mean it’s a beautiful space. You have nice views. You can see it. It’s a
small space, right? It can get crowded real quickly, especially if you get a critical mass, like a lot
of our spaces, but just in general. And it’s right up on the top so there’s a lot of visibility as folks
are walking past and go through. What I will say, though—and this is something that I think all
Centers and spaces struggle with—if you see a community of people in the space, there’s always
this question of do I belong here or don’t I, right? And so, I did hear early on, right, some of the
challenges were “Oh, I’m not Black. I can’t go in the space. [chuckles] Should I set foot inside?”
Even though if you want to learn about—Just because it’s called the Black Student Center, it’s
focused on Black issues and other things that affect the Black community, but it’s not limited to
individuals who identify as Black. And so, that has always been a tension, right, when it comes
to who can come into the space, who’s allowed to step through the doors. Do I feel comfortable?
Some of that we, as directors of our spaces, we try to make it as inviting as much as we can. But,
ultimately, it’s up to that student to step through that door [chuckles] and take that step to go
inside that space. So, you know, it was a beautiful space. They had a great computer lab, selfpublish stations. It was very tiny so there was one office and one desk. There was a small
kitchenette and other things that you would normally want to see in a student-centered space for
individuals. So, yeah, it was an exciting time. I would say, like any new spaces on campus, we
want to make sure that they’re successful. And people hung out there. I will say, right, so just
being in the Cross-Cultural Center and as these spaces have evolved and developed, people that
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we normally would have seen previously in some of our spaces then started to go and gravitate,
right? So, if there were Black individuals who at one point prior hung out in the Cross-Cultural
Center, they now felt like—well, I don’t know if they felt like, but I would maybe see them
upstairs now, right? I would have to go upstairs to connect with them versus before they would
be just be right behind me, whether on couches or something like that. I could just say, “Hey,
how’s it going?” and connect with them. So, that’s all part of the shift that I think that happened
with student spaces, and where you feel comfortable, where you feel like you belong. And those
are always dynamic, and they change, depending on the students when they come in and how
they pass on orally [next few words are cut off] . . . students hang out. And then, all of a sudden
you start to get some of these myths about where people should or shouldn’t be with regard to
that.
Ford: So, can you tell me a little bit about the early focus of the Black Student Center’s
programs, and different initiatives that they did during the day?
Lai: Yeah. What I recall—and, again, I wasn’t integral in the design, because Anthony Jett, the
first director, really dictated a lot of that, but in my conversations with him there were a few
themes that I recognized, right? One, I think, was leveraging the experience of the community in
North County, which—I don’t think North County—Not to say that there aren’t Black
communities, but it’s not predominantly an area regionally known for that. And so, part of it was
establishing relationships. So, I want to say the NAACP has a chapter, I think, in North County
or maybe in Vista or nearby. Mira Costa has centers or spaces. And so, Mira Costa does a Martin
Luther King, Jr. Day of Service, right, for example, which at our campus we don’t do. We have
Cesar Chavez, at the time. We do now. And so, there were—I think, Anthony, some of his first
parts were really establishing those relationships because, again, there had not been a Black
Student Center prior. And so, those relationships weren’t necessarily there, or the focus and
taking the time to focus on those relationships weren’t necessarily there. I also think that,
wherever possible, the director would try to help with recruitment. So, when we think about
outreach on our campus, oftentimes these occur seventh, eighth grade, maybe high school. And
so, he would spend a lot of his time either going to high school or conferences or fairs to try and
let them know about the fact that there was a Black Student Center and that, yes, there are Black
students and a Black community, even though it’s small, at Cal State San Marcos. It was
establishing relationships with organizations like the NAACP or other institutions. It was really
getting involved in the community. And that’s something, I think from what I observed, was
something he spent a lot of his time doing, right? Secondary to that, and that’s where we often
connected, was the programmatic nature of what was the focus and what was it going to look
like. And he—and I’m forgetting what his affiliation is—but he was part of one of the Divine
Nine. It may have been Omega Psi, Omega Phi? I haven’t been on campus, so my Greek is—
Omega Psi Phi, I think it is, one of the Black fraternities. He himself was a member, so he built
relationships, right, and brought on the fraternity and helped in those efforts, strengthened those
pieces with regard to community, tried to have programming with students and work
collaboratively with the Black Student Union. Student organizations, they ebb and flow [laugh]
depending on who the leadership is. Sometimes, they’re really strong and sometimes people are
busy and so there’s not a lot of traction. So, whatever the leadership was at the time, I think he
tried to forge relationships with them as well. So yeah, I think those were the efforts. I think also
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knowing, and I shared with you early on, when I came on and there was no other Center and
space, I primarily drove a lot of the History Months or the Heritage Months. And so, with the
establishment of the Black Student Center now, there could be a focus. And that became their
responsibility or purview to some degree, if they wanted to do programming or things like that
and how they might be able to support community, create community, create opportunities for
folks to gather. Those were all efforts that I think Black History Month, Black Excellence Month
now, those are some of the programming efforts and focus that he was in charge of. I want to say
he started in August, in the summer, so he had a really quick pivot time to try and get going
because usually with planning like this, for any programming, a couple months in advance you
want to be there. So, he was scrambling, not only trying to build those relationships, but also
create some sort of programming that would work. So, we often would leverage and say, “Oh
yeah. We’ve got this program. Let’s support one another,” or things like that, in helping to move
that work forward and increasing the visibility of the Center and space.
Ford: Mm-hmm. So, current, and previously, have there been any collaborative efforts between
the Cross-Cultural Center and the Black Student Center?
Lai: There have. I mentioned earlier, more recently, I would say we have looked at different
ways to view those collaborations. So, first and foremost, the Cross-Cultural Center does a
program called the Social Justice Summit which is a weekend retreat to talk about issues of
social justice, to explore identity. How does that connect with the choices and decisions we make
to look at power and privilege? And then, it’s a three-day conference, so by the last day of the
summit/retreat, we are looking at what does that mean? How do we become an ally? So, all the
Centers, including the Black Student Center once they came online, were all invited
collaborators with that sort of social justice programming. It’s not only signature programs but
it’s also a way that all of us intersect across our different programming areas. So, that’s definitely
one area that I would say he was invited to. But again, he had so much on his plate, I don’t know
if we were necessarily able to leverage that at the time when he first came onboard with the
Black Student Center. Since then—and I’ll speak probably more recently and actually this is
going to be tomorrow—we are doing a program tomorrow called Beyond Just Us: Empathy and
Justice Across Communities, and that’s a collaboration with the Cross-Cultural Center and the
Black Student Center. Now, that has also been a shift in our space. And I don’t know. We’re not
talking about the Cross-Cultural Center, but we started to do more programming in the absence
of an Asian Pacific Islander Desi American-dedicated space. And that’s not us. We have a lot of
students who identify, that hang out in our space: Filipino, Chinese, otherwise. But, in the
absence of an actual space, we’re doing programming because there’s still going to be a need for
that. So, that’s a program defining diaspora, a APIDA identities. That’s a program series we do
within our space. And in light of the recent assaults and attacks on Asian American communities,
and sometimes by perpetrators who were perceived as Black, we’ve seen an increase in the
solidarity marches and/or the ways in which both of these communities have come together,
right? And so, tomorrow is an example of where we’re looking at what does that intersectionality
look like between Asian and Black communities? What has that history been, right? In the
description, we talk about this trope. I don’t know when you were born, Ayana, but I was in high
school during the 1992 riots, Rodney King, when the policemen were acquitted and the aftermath
of all that, or actually leading up to all that, right, what happened as a result of his beating. And
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at the time—again, so this goes back to your very first question about my lens and stuff in high
school—that was probably another point, just looking at those relationships because I remember
having arguments with my Korean friends like “Why are you going to L.A.?” I’m not anti-gun.
I’m not a fan of having any firearms in general, right? That’s not for me to deal with. And I
remember having heated conversations with them about why are you going to Korea Town. Just
stay safe! And they’re like “No. This is our livelihood, so we need to protect ourselves.” Well,
anyway, there was this trope. There was this “It’s Black against Asian,” right, because L.A., and
then if you go to Korea Town, those are the businesses that were being looted or specifically
targeted. And so, that trope has reemerged again, right? “Oh, these attacks against Asian
American communities, they’re all perpetrated by Black people.” And so, there’s this thing
where, again, looking at White supremacy in a broader context, things that I’m starting to learn
more about now, that it’s pitting two different groups against one another rather than looking at
the larger issues and systemic issues that are happening that are shared across both communities.
And so, because of that, that’s what we’re going to be exploring a little bit tomorrow, right, is
kind of demystifying that trope, recognizing where each of these communities have some
commonality, where they can stand in solidarity, how we can feel like we can be empathetic but
also be accountable, right, to those things, and the complicated histories, right? I talk about how
Asian Americans can sometimes perpetuate that notion of anti-Blackness. So, what is our role in
that, and then where does that apply when the perceived perpetrators are they themselves Black,
right? It’s not about blaming but looking at the bigger picture. So, that’s just another more
current example, yet to happen tomorrow, that we’re going to be putting on. And I look forward
to possibly great relationships now with John being the current director and because of the
structures that I mentioned earlier in our conversation, where we work more closely together
than we have previously. We’re being able to see more opportunities to collaborate and to do
some programming between the Black Student Center and the Cross-Cultural Center, and that
it’s more targeted, right? Another one that didn’t happen this year but perhaps the next year—
one thing that we do in the Cross-Cultural Center to differentiate ourselves from some of the
other spaces is we have a focus on advocacy and activism. What does that look like? We’re not
going to dictate, this is how you are an activist or not, [laughs] you’re an activist. But we do
believe that I think students need to know about what are some models. What are some
strategies? What are—you know, protests are important, and it definitely has a place in creating
change. It’s not the only way to create change. It’s the most visible way, and I think oftentimes
students and others conflate that if I’m going to be an activist, I have to be out on the streets.
[laughs] And so, we’re trying to provide different venues and avenues for exploring what
activism and advocacy looks like. Also, as a tangent—and this goes back, sort of connected—but
I’ve been a part of my professional associations and I went to conferences, and one of the things
that struck me was that when a lot of these Black Lives Matter protests were occurring, it was a
student who was at Stanford. He was an engineer. He was a Black student. But he talked about “I
go to these protests, and I got arrested. I wasn’t expecting to be arrested, but I got arrested. And
then, the rest of the semester, I had to deal with going to court, working with my lawyer,” all
these things that, in the moment, he hadn’t thought about necessarily, or maybe he thought about
but he didn’t think it all the way through. And so, those were all things that caused me to think
about “Okay, we need to do more to help educate our students so that it’s not like ‘Hey, come
with me. We’re going to go do this.’” It’s more like “Okay. If you are going to go protest and
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you might get arrested, what are some practical things you should know about before you go
there, right?” all those things. Anyway. So, having said that—that was a lot—we, as part of that
program of the Activist Lab, which is another program series we do—we were going to explore
the legacy of John Lewis. So, this year, in particular, the library has—their read is the book They
Came for Us, by George Takei, which is a graphic novel, and the power of graphic novels. And
so, March, the book by John Lewis, is a three-part book, talks and illustrates similarly and
actually was inspiration, I believe, for the George Takei book, They Came for Us. So, we were
going to work with the Black Student Center, going all the way back to your first question for
that collaboration, of trying to do a book discussion about March, right? What was John Lewis’s
legacy? How did he, at his young age, decide to do what he did when it came to protesting and
sitting in diners where he wasn’t supposed to be? So, again, this was just through a lens of trying
to understand strategies, looking at models or individuals who could be models of what activism
looks like and how do they come to those decisions. But we needed to postpone that, but that’s
another example of a program where we worked with the Black Student Center or will be
working with the Black Student Center in identifying programmatic opportunities and
connections. And there will continue to be opportunities because very much all of our work is
very intersectional in nature. We all believe that I’m not just an Asian identified individual. I’m
male. I’m heterosexual or straight, right? All those identities impact one another and sometimes
they coincide with some of these other spaces like the LatinX Center or the Black Student
Center.
Ford: Mm-hmm.
Lai: Yeah.
Ford: I look forward to hearing more about those programs.
Lai: Yeah. [laughs]
Ford: So, do you know why the Black Student Center was moved from Student Success to
Student Life?
Lai: Yes. I think part of it was, again, a restructuring to leverage resources. I think there was—I
won’t get too much into it, but I reported up to the Vice President of Student Affairs, Dr. Lorena
Checa. However, we all reported differently to different supervisors. And so, that in and of itself
causes—so, I may have a different focus or approach than Student Success has an approach,
right? And so, we just had different ways in which we’re doing it— [reception starts to become
very choppy]
Ford: Can you hold off one second? [seems to be trying to figure out how to improve reception]
Lai: —instead of going in three different directions, we feel like we’re all going in the same
direction. Oh, sure.
Ford: So, why was the Black Student Center moved from the Student Success to Student Life?
Lai: Yes. My short answer would be that it was a leveraging of resources. Whereas reporting to
three different associate vice presidents, by going to a singular associate vice president or
supervisor, and then to the vice president of student affairs, we are in lockstep to some degree.
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We still have a lot of autonomy but we’re moving in the same direction, whereas before we may
have been going in three different directions because we each had a supervisor who may have
had a different approach or had a thought about what we should be prioritizing. Consolidating
those efforts, in my estimation, has helped us to really focus in on what is it that collectively, all
five of us, how do we tell our story? Where are there areas for overlap, collaboration, or
opportunities that we previously connected with? And we want to collaborate. The campus, by
nature, we just tend to be collaborative in general, but even more so now. We can leverage the
fact that we all have the same supervisor, the same area. We all have a similar basic mission now
around this notion of student life in moving forward. Now, Student Success is a part of Student
Life. It all, again, overlaps in a lot of ways. But having a singular supervisor, in my estimation,
helps us to move that more successfully and hopefully make bigger strides in progressing and
moving our individual agendas or our approaches more effectively and efficiently.
Ford: Mm-hmm. Okay. So, what are some of the wrinkles that needed to be ironed out during the
opening of the Center?
Lai: I think same as anyone else, how people could fit. Who’s going to fit? [chuckles] When we
could have food, do we have enough food for everyone? How much is that going to cost? Are
people going to come? Are they not going to come? How do we ensure success? What is success
defined as? I think those are all part of the wrinkles. We all have a blueprint for what we hope
will happen, but the wrinkles are really the details in trying to figure out what needs to happen,
how to ensure that those things are happening. Those are some of the early ones, I think, more
than anything. Just like any new Center or space, you’ve got to publicize. And it’s funny. You
could be screaming from the top. You could have a million signs— [laughs]
Ford: Mm-hmm. [nods]
Lai: —on the door that tell you exactly what’s going on and you still will have people go “Oh,
what’s this?” Right? Because people are just not in that frame of mind. And in the same vein,
you could be screaming from the rooftops, “We have a Black Student Center!” and you’ll
inevitably have a student that goes “Oh. I didn’t know that we had it.” [laughs] Getting yourself
visible, letting folks know about it, helping them understand what the initial purpose is, who is it
for? I heard stories, and these were probably from Black students, they’d be sitting there, and
people would be walking and tiptoeing by the door. They’d look inside and they would keep
walking, right? Like “Is this where I’m supposed to— Can I come in?” And these were also
Black students, maybe even too, to some degree, right? So, just those experiences and
hesitancies, I think, are all part of the wrinkles that were a part of that sort of opening to some
degree. Our program as well, in the first year, we were trying to establish what is the . . . What
are the needs of the students? How do I meet those needs and ensure that this is a place that they
would want to come back to? Those are all wrinkles, I think, that I think early on needed to be
worked . . . And why—all the more reason that any inaugural director has a huge burden to try
and lift, right, when you’re the first of any [technical difficulties] because it’s freeing as there’s
no precedent. It doesn’t feel like you have to step up to anything. But at the same time there’s no
real benchmark either for what that’s like [technical difficulties] And so, those are all the
wrinkles and things that people sorted through in the early days of the Black Student Center.

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Ford: Mm-hmm. So, what do you feel like the main purpose of the creation of the Center was? I
knew you went into a little bit of detail on that before, but in your opinion.
Lai: Yeah. I think that there is an acknowledgment and a desire that spaces like these can be
helpful in supporting students in their efforts [technical difficulties] I feel like [technical
difficulties] just as they need to be able to move forward. There are ways in which that can be
manifest. There are different models. I came from a—I told you about the Cross-Cultural Center
at UC Irvine where I did my undergrad and then eventually worked for a couple of years. They
were established in the early ‘70s, but then higher education has gone through budget cuts and
then sometimes it does well. So, there’s a lot of these cycles. And there was a moment in time
where “We don’t have money. So, we’re going to consolidate everything. And then, we’ll have
specialists,” right? And then, there’s other times where it’s like they see it’s a dedicated space,
right? And so, I think we go through cycles like that. And so, I think regardless of the efforts that
I may have tried to do or contribute, either in supporting the student organization, I wasn’t Black,
you know. And that’s not a dig and saying that you have to be in order to. I just didn’t really
have that perspective or experience. And so, I think there was a need to have a Center or a space
dedicated, especially in light of Black Lives Matter and a lot of these things that are issues that
are more complex and complicated that I think require those people to be able to—And even
then [next few words unintelligible due to reception] that’s of value for any particular challenge.
So, I think there’s that. There was the fact that students wanted it, right? And there was a desire
for that. And so, we want to support students in those efforts. But we also want to make sure that
students are doing it thoughtfully and not, as I said, just because they want a space. They need to
be able to justify why. And I think they were able to articulate that there was a need. So, to me,
that’s the reason why I think a Black Student Center needed to exist. There was not enough
programming or attention being paid to the issues that the Black community needed to address at
Cal State San Marcos. And so, the Black Student Center helped to fill that void to some degree
[technical difficulties] individuals who focused their specifically on the needs of the Black
community and how to move those efforts forward.
Ford: Mm-hmm. So, do you think that purpose has been accomplished?
Lai: I think it’s in process. I think that we’re moving in the right direction. I believe so. I think all
those things I mentioned about our students coming, how do we generate those. Because students
come every year, right, and cycle through every four years, in a lot of ways because people that
are coming in don’t always have the context or the history. And so, I think it can feel repetitive
but for the student who has never been there, it’s the first time they’re hearing this information
and what the purpose of the Black Student Center might be. And so, to your question, yes, they
are accomplishing it. I feel like they’re moving in that direction. I think that they’re building
community. I feel like we’re there tackling and connecting with spaces like mine across
[technical difficulties] the Cross-Cultural Center [technical difficulties] to really [technical
difficulties] because there are so many [technical difficulties] you know, or if you are Black from
Africa versus Black in the United States. All of those things I think are part of that direction and
effort of what the Black Student Center is trying to accomplish. And so, I believe, yes, they are
moving in the right direction, and there’s always going to be opportunities to do better. But I feel
confident that they’re making strides. The fact that we get a chance to talk about the oral history
and talking about the history of the Center is a positive step in the right direction, to
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acknowledge its origins and also perspective on what its impact has been on Cal State San
Marcos. And, for me, that means that if you have the ability to go back and reflect, that means
you kind of have a good . . . because early on, it’s hard to know where you want to go when you
don’t know where you’ve been, is something I learned from a mentor. And so, history, context
has been such a part of my own professional development. And so, I was excited and why I was
“Oh, yeah. I want to sign up. I want to be a part of this project,” because these pieces are helpful
for future generations to understand what it was, why it was created, why it should be continued
or why I think they should continue to fight for its existence in the future, regardless of whatever
may happen in the future.
Ford: So, how did the Black Student Center opening impact you personally?
Lai: I was excited for it. I think I could see individuals, as I mentioned, who maybe hung out in
our spaces prior really excited and really happy that they had a space that they felt like they
could call their own, right? Again, not to say they couldn’t come downstairs and hang out in the
Cross-Cultural Center, but a space that they feel like they had a connection to. Very much like
when I shared with you my own personal experience with [technical difficulties] race
formational center because I was going through this sort of with my own identity development. I
saw very much in them what I saw in myself many, many years ago at UC Irvine, that they felt
like they had a place that they felt a direct connection to. It wasn’t necessarily transactional. It
wasn’t like “I’m just here to use the computer.” It was a space where they could go and they
could find community, where they could be themselves. And I didn’t say this but where you
could go and be yourself without having to explain yourself to anyone else, if that makes sense,
right? [technical difficulties] a lot of places where there’s a lot of diverse people and then people
ask you questions and you’re like “Okay. I’ve got to talk about that again,” versus you go to
spaces like a Black Student Center if you’re Black in particular, and people just get you, right?
There’s not a what? Why? What? You know, it’s just they get you. So, I think I saw that energy
being—and I still see it now, right, with the students that decide or choose to be a part of those
spaces. And so, that’s kind of [technical difficulties], that I’ve observed and seen. Anytime
there’s a new space that is focused on the wellbeing and success of student populations,
particularly those that are marginalized, I think I’ve come to appreciate and be optimistic that
those spaces can serve a greater purpose, right, and how they can help students in their own
personal development much like the Cross-Cultural Center did for me when I was at UC Irvine.
Ford: So, with how everything is, what would you expect next to see from the Black Student
Center?
Lai: That’s a great question. That’s a John [Rawlins III], the director, question. I guess what I
would hope to see is opportunities to engage in broader conversations, right, of what Blackness
looks like in the many other spaces or other communities. I would love to see a large number of
students get [technical difficulties] and come into Cal State San Marcos as their first choice, not
necessarily just because there’s a Black Student Center, but because there’s a sense that the Cal
State San Marcos campus is dedicated to Black excellence, is dedicated to the success of
students, and it’s demonstrated because the students have this. It’s one of multiple pieces, right?
But it can play an integral piece in the cocurricular experience that students have. I’m in Student
Affairs and what that means is that I look at the co-curriculum, what happens outside of the
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classroom. There’s a lot that happens inside the classroom, but I often believe that if they have a
great experience outside of the classroom, those narratives, those anecdotes, those stories
supplement what they learn in the classroom, right? There’s this theory. How does this thing—?
You’re like, “Well, I have experienced that. Can I translate that into better experiences?” So, it’s
the cycle and there is some reciprocity. What happens inside the classroom, what happens
outside the classroom, there’s a symbiotic relationship. And so, I look forward to a time when
the Black Student Center can continue to play a critical role in those efforts for our Black
students at Cal State San Marcos. I guess long term, and optimistically, I hope that like “Oh my
gosh. They got an amazing Black Student Center at Cal State San Marcos.” And so, that
definitely is going to be the reason why I want to be able to go there, right? They’ve got some
amazing programs or initiatives that are unique or novel. They look at it a little bit differently.
They’re very creative, right? That you wouldn’t necessarily [technical difficulties] I think those
are things that I look forward to, right? I’m also aware of the fact that our current structure—
John is the only director [chuckles]; there’s a lot of us who help—that it's not his burden to bear
alone, if that makes sense, right? Just like when we talk about issues of diversity or issues of
inclusive excellence, it’s not just a diversity people. It’s not the people of color’s responsibility
alone. Everyone has to play a role. And so, in that same vein, the Black Student Center’s success
will also hinge on my ability to provide and support them and help them to be successful in my
own contributions, whether it’s being a part of this, finding ways to assist them and help them in
their efforts, defending them when necessary, when people go “Why do we need a Black Student
Center?” and helping to foster and build a stronger community together.
Ford: So, are there any other questions that I haven’t asked that I could or which you want to add
or anything else?
Lai: No. It was pretty thorough. I was curious because as I was hearing about the oral history
project, I know we talked about it. I said, “Okay, you want to send me the questions?” And
you’re like “Oh, no. It’s just going to be a conversation.” So, I had no idea what the questions are
going to be. And so, I was like “Why do they care what my childhood was like?” [both laugh]
Because this is for the Black Student Center Oral History Project. But I appreciate those
questions, and . . . and motivations, right, for my connection to the Black Student Center. In my
self defense, I am someone or co-conspirator to some degree, someone who wants to create
positive change in the community. I’m still doing the work every day and trying to figure out
what I could do better each time, what to do differently, right, in a way that hopefully is helpful.
I still learn from John, the director, and help support him. So, yeah. So, thank you so much—
Ford: Thank you so much for letting me interview you. That was a wonderful—
Lai: —for the opportunity. [I don’t have] anything else to add other than yeah, for the
opportunity to share with you and to get to know you better, or at least partially, right? [both
laugh]
Ford: Thank you so much.
Lai: Of course, Ayana. I think that’s it for me, right? Is there any other questions or no?
Ford: No.
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Lai: We’re good?
Ford: Yeah.
Lai: Okay.

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              <text>            6.0                        Gilmore, Geoffrey. Interview April 14th, 2021.      SC027-04      01:12:56      SC027      California State University San Marcos University Library Special Collections oral history collection            Campus oral histories      CSUSM      This oral history was made possible in collaboration with the Black Student Center and with generous funding from the Instructionally Related Activities fund.&amp;#13 ;  &amp;#13 ;  Please see the related “Preferred Citation note” for language on citing materials from this collection. &amp;#13 ;   &amp;#13 ;  Permission to examine Library materials is not authorization to publish or to reproduce the examined material in whole, or in part. Persons wishing to quote, publish, perform, reproduce, or otherwise make use of an item in the library’s collections must assume all responsibility for identifying and satisfying any claimants of the copyright holder. &amp;#13 ;   &amp;#13 ;  The researcher assumes full responsibility for use of the material and agrees to hold harmless the University Library, and California State University, against all claims, demands, costs, and expenses incurred by copyright infringement or any other legal or regulatory cause of action arising from the use of the library's materials. &amp;#13 ;   &amp;#13 ;  In assuming full responsibility for use of the material, the researcher also understands that the materials they examine may contain Social Security numbers, other personal identifiers, and/or sensitive material on potentially living and identifiable individuals (e.g., medical, evaluative, or personally invasive information). The researcher agrees not to record, reproduce, or disclose any Social Security number or other information of a highly personal nature that may be found. &amp;#13 ;        csusm      Black Student Center      student success      California State University San Marcos      Black experience      Geoffrey Gilmore      Sierra Jenkins      moving image      GilmoreGeoffrey_JenkinsSierra_2021-04-14_Access.mp4            0            https://archivesoralhistories.csusm.edu/files/original/5092b218abace83b431090029a7e6156.mp4              Other                                        video                  English                              0          Interview Introduction                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    36          Childhood                                        Gilmore briefly discusses his childhood growing up in Seattle and his feeling of isolation without close family.                     Seattle ;  Los Angeles ;  isolation ;  family                                                                0                                                                                                                    177          Developing an understanding of Blackness                                        Gilmore speaks about how his understanding of blackness came mostly from books, documentaries, lectures, and his family and peers.                     self-education ;  informal education                                                                0                                                                                                                    300          Learning about Black history and the Black experience in childhood and adolescence                                        Gilmore talks about her exposure to Black history in school, which was largely misinformation and seen through a lens of whiteness.                     Black history ;  Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. ;  Malcom X ;  Civil Rights Movement ;  Black Panthers ;  power ;  teacher                                                                0                                                                                                                    680          College experience                                        Gilmore reflects on his time in college at Washington State University. In contrast to his earlier education experience, he was able to take Black studies courses and interact with a diversity of Black people. He talks in length about a television series titled “Them” and how its premise and conclusion has impacted him.                     Black history ;  Black studies ;  Black and white relations ;  Them television series ;  racism ;  power dynamic                                                                0                                                                                                                    1703          Personal impact of Black activism and social justice movements                                        Gilmore reflects on his main philosophy that is Black empowerment through education. He has spent his career helping students to realize how they can succeed in education and in their careers.                      educational philosophy ;  student success ;  empowerment through education ;  student struggle ;  student learning ;  remedial education                                                                0                                                                                                                    2624          Early focus of the Black Student Center's initiatives, programming, events                                        Gilmore speaks about many events sponsored by the Black Student Center. From his perspective, the main purpose of the Center was to be focused on education and student success.                     Black Student Center ;  education ;  learning ;  events ;  Kwanzaa ;  Black Panters ;  Tulsa Massacre ;  Black health                                                                0                                                                                                                    2992          Gilmore's role in establishing the Black Student Center                                        Gilmore speaks about his role in establishing the Center, including his initial oversight of the Center. From his perspective, the main purpose of the Center was to be focused on education and student success.                                        Black Student Center ;  student success ;  Dr. Gail Cole-Avent ;  John Rawlins III ;  Jake Northington ;  organizational structure                                            0                                                                                                                    3147          The process of creating the Black Student Center                                        Gilmore discusses the initial push by students for a Black Student Center.                    Black Student Center ;  meeting ;  President Karen Haynes ;  formal request                                                                0                                                                                                                    3295          Leaders of the Black Student Center project, their contributions, and unsung heroes                                        Gilmore mentions how to find a list of people who were involved in establishing the Black Student Center. He also talks about the faculty and staff working behind the scenes on this student-driven initiative                    Black Student Center website ;  CSUSM faculty ;  CSUSM staff ;  student-driven                                                                0                                                                                                                    3441          University Administration’s vision for the Black Student Center                                        Gilmore speaks about the priorities for the Black Student Center being student success, engagement, and involvement. The Black Student Center was moved from Student Academic Support Services to Student Life.                     Black Student Center ;  student success ;  student engagement ;  Student Academic Support Services ;  Student Life                                                                0                                                                                                                    3607          Opposition to the creation of the Black Student Center                                        Gilmore briefly speaks to campus worries about the establishment of a Black Student Center on campus.                    Black Student Center ;  white student center ;  pushback                                                                0                                                                                                                    3732          Experiencing the Grand Opening of the Black Student Center/BSC's impact on the campus communitiy                                        Gilmore reflects on the grand opening of the Center, especially the emphasis on creating relationships with the local Black community.                     grand opening ;  relationships ;  local service area ;  Black Student Unions ;  pipeline ;  community members ;  careers ;  National Association for the Advancement of Colored People ;  Jack and Jill organization ;  conference                                                                0                                                                                                                    4118          Personal impact of the Black Student Center on Gilmore                                        Gilmore reflects on how the educational events and connection with students in the Black Student Center impacted him.                    educational events ;  student connection                                                                0                                                                                                                    4273          Future expectations of the Black Student Center                                        Future expectations of the Black Student Center. Gilmore shares his expectation for taking the Black Student Center to the next level.                     Dr. Gail Cole-Avent ;  John Rawlins III ;  student success ;  graduation                                                                0                                                                                                              oral history      Dr. Geoffry Gilmore specifically touches on the issues of Black people within academic spaces and his experience helping students to succeed on a university level. Dr. Gilmore also discusses his own history as he moved from Los Angeles to Seattle, and back to California.                 NOTE TRANSCRIPTION BEGIN  00:00:00.000 --&gt; 00:01:00.000   Today is Wednesday, April 14, 2021 at two zero eight p.m. I am Sierra Jenkins, student at CSU San Marcos, and today I'm interviewing Dr. Geoffrey Gilmore for the Black Student Center oral history project, a collaboration of the CSUSM Black Student Canter and CSUSM University Library Special Collections. Dr. Gilmore, thank you for being here with me today. How are you doing? Geoffrey Gilmore: I'm doing well. Thank you.  Jenkins: Glad to hear it. So I'm just gonna' jump right in. So our first question for today is where were you born and where did you grow up? Gilmore: I was born in, I was born in, in Los Angeles, California, and I grew up in Seattle, Washington. Jenkins: How was it growing up in Seattle as compared to Los Angeles? Gilmore: It was different, you know, it was, you know, it was a lot, it was a lot different.  00:01:00.000 --&gt; 00:02:00.000 It was isolating in the sense that, in the sense that, that the family that we had here in California was very expansive. We have a lot of family who had migrated and settled and stayed in the Los Angeles area for a long time. And so I've got a lot of family in the Los Angeles area and particularly in Pasadena, California, and you know, in Washington, when we moved up there, that wasn't the case. I think, a little later on, we had a couple of cousins  00:02:00.000 --&gt; 00:03:00.000 who were up there, but, who had moved up there, but other than that there wasn't, there were not, there were not that many. So yeah, it was different. Jenkins: How old were you when you moved to Seattle? Gilmore: I was, I was very young. I was four years old. Jenkins: Okay. And how old were you when you moved back out to California? Gilmore: When I moved back to California, I was, I was 30. Jenkins: Oh, wow. So you definitely grew up in Seattle completely. Gilmore: Right. Jenkins: How did you come to your understanding of Blackness? Gilmore: A lot of it, I would say a lot of it came from  00:03:00.000 --&gt; 00:04:00.000 experience and then there was, family as well. And then on top of that, there was the education I received. And I will emphasize that when I say education, I'm not talking about education in the formal sense of school, although school did attempt to educate me to accept what the role that society had actually established for Black people in this country. But, you know, it was more so self-education, as well as informal  00:04:00.000 --&gt; 00:05:00.000 experiences, where maybe peers or other members within the Black community had actually referred me to information from different books, documentaries, and, having attended different lectures, all that kind of stuff. So educationally,  it was largely informal but then, of course, like I said, there's the life experience as well as, the education that came from family. Jenkins: Thank you for that. What were you taught in childhood and adolescence about Black history and the Black experience? Gilmore: It's  00:05:00.000 --&gt; 00:06:00.000 interesting that you asked that question. Really when it came down to Black experience, what I was educated is that in school in particular, is that Black people are in a lower social class than white people. And really than anybody else in the world that we are at the bottom when it comes to when it comes to social class, based on race and was also educated--actually, I'll tell you what--I'll tell you a story that sort of underscores what that was. I can remember, I believe it may have been  00:06:00.000 --&gt; 00:07:00.000 in the fourth grade that this really occurred. We were learning about, I guess, quote, Black history in the classroom, and it was all about slavery and the struggle of the Black people in the Civil Rights Movement, and how Martin Luther King was this great person because he encouraged the struggle to be non-violent, whereas Malcolm X and the Black Panthers were violent, racist, haters of white people and wanted to kill white people and  00:07:00.000 --&gt; 00:08:00.000 all this kind of stuff. And as she went into that part of our education, I can remember that one of the white students in the class had raised his hand and asked the teacher a question, and the question that he asked was if we were to ever let Black people have power then would they put us in slavery and do the same things to us that we've done to them. And the teacher thought about the question for a moment and really her answer to that question reinforced what the intention  00:08:00.000 --&gt; 00:09:00.000 of that lesson was, right? And really, reinforced what the whole message about power in this country is all, as it pertains to race, is all about. And her answer to the question was you know that's a really good question. I don't know. And so the thing is, just in looking at, in really unpacking that question and what the student was asking, first of all just in asking, if we ever let Black people have power, first of all, that means that the white people have the  00:09:00.000 --&gt; 00:10:00.000 power, and the only way that Black people can ever have power is if the white people let Black people have power. Right? And so that's the first thing. And then, the second thing was this fear that what they have imposed on Black people would be reciprocated back to them and all of that. Right? And just in what the teacher was saying all of that message was the message that she clearly intended to get across given the answer to that question. And that answer basically confirmed that, yes, her intent was to--what's to say that white people have all the power  00:10:00.000 --&gt; 00:11:00.000 and the only way Black people can ever have power is if white people let them have power? And that it is a real fear of white people that Black people with power would return the evil that has been imposed on our people. So that was the gist of the formal education that I was given about Black people in school. And I can tell you that really from year to year moving on from there, and even before that, that was the message that was being delivered. That was the, that was what we were being educated to  00:11:00.000 --&gt; 00:12:00.000 believe.  Jenkins: That's horrible. That's such an interesting story to have experienced in fourth grade. What did you learn after adolescence prior to coming to CSUSM? Gilmore: Well, there's a whole lot of time in between adolescence and CSUSM. So, I would say--I guess you're talking about, after I left high school, correct? Jenkins: Yes.  Gilmore: Okay. So when I left high school and went to college, it was different. And it was different in the sense that while  00:12:00.000 --&gt; 00:13:00.000 attending a predominantly white college, or university, I also, the company I kept was largely Black. We had a sizable enough Black community at Washington State that really was who I was with the majority of the time I was there, you know? And so educationally speaking, it was different in the sense that, at this point I'm actually--I could actually take Black studies courses  00:13:00.000 --&gt; 00:14:00.000 and actually learn more in a formal educational setting about Black people in this country and around the world. On top of that, there was the informal education, that was in the same vein, along the same vein of what I had mentioned before with peers and with other people in the community and what--really just being referred to different books, different documentaries, all that kind of stuff. And even in special lectures and all that kind of stuff. And even that,  00:14:00.000 --&gt; 00:15:00.000 looking at a lot of these things on my own, that was a big part, but also, I would say that interacting with people who had come to Washington State from a continent, that was a huge educational experience in itself as well. And to be able to learn more about the continent and about what had, what had actually gone on the continent beyond slavery, beyond the slave trade, was a very illuminating experience. And so that kind of gets back to your previous  00:15:00.000 --&gt; 00:16:00.000 question about what I learned about Black people growing up. And one thing that I would say that I walked away from my K-12 experience with was the warped understanding that Africa was all about National Geographic or apartheid, one of the two. And so therefore, my perspective was that anybody from, anybody who I met from Africa, either lived in apartheid under the apartheid system, being oppressed by white people, or they live like National Geographic in the bush. And that was my understanding  00:16:00.000 --&gt; 00:17:00.000 coming out of high school and it was very illuminating to be able to go to college and actually get to know and interact with people who had come over to the United States from the continent and get their college education at Washington State like I did. And in doing that, that understanding or that misunderstanding, and that miseducation as to what Africa was all about was dispelled definitively in the--through those interactions.  00:17:00.000 --&gt; 00:18:00.000 And I would have to say that what, in learning about what had actually occurred in various places around the continent over, around the continent that I came to realize that I'd been lied to, and it's that sort of thing to where when you have a--let's say if you're talking to your parents growing up and they asked you a question about what happened and you give them a part of the story but not the whole story as to what happened and what are they going to say? They're going to say that you lied. Right? And essentially  00:18:00.000 --&gt; 00:19:00.000 that's what happened in my educational experience, that a part of the story that really made them look good or powerful maybe--I wouldn't even say look good because much of our story in this country as it pertains to Black and white race relations much of that is rooted in pure evil, you know? And I don't know if you've seen that, the Lovecraft Country show, or if you've seen Them, which just came out on Amazon Prime. Jenkins: I've heard a lot about it, and I haven't heard the best of things.  00:19:00.000 --&gt; 00:20:00.000 And that's what kind of pushed me away from it. 'Cause it has a lot of our trauma on screen and some of that can be triggering. So I kind of stayed away from it. I've planned to watch Lovecraft, 'cause I know that that one has more of a better ending, but I've heard that Them doesn't really come to a conclusion--that it, it's kind of just like our trauma for entertainment. Gilmore: Them had a conclusion.  Jenkins: Oh, it did?  Gilmore: Yes, it did. And it had a very powerful conclusion at that. And I would say that as far as that show is concerned, that it is important for us to watch that, the creator's expression of  00:20:00.000 --&gt; 00:21:00.000 the Black experience, is through that, through that program because the creator really nailed the trauma as you put it of the Black experience in this country 100%, and the way in which he did it, in my opinion, was pure genius, you know? So, I would highly, highly, highly recommend it, very highly recommend it. It was difficult to watch, and it was painful in much--I would say the majority of it was painful, but the way in which it ended, it ended  00:21:00.000 --&gt; 00:22:00.000 with power, and again, I most definitely wholeheartedly recommend that show. There's a lot to unpack in that show. And one of the things about it is that we recognize our experience and the experience of those who came before us because I'll tell you one of the things about watching something like that, right? Is where we can hear about the experiences that the people who came before us went through, right? But to really see it and to really understand it is a whole 'nother thing. And to really get down to the  00:22:00.000 --&gt; 00:23:00.000 evil of racism that has existed in our country and still exists in our country is critical for us to really wake up and determine our place in the society. Really the way in which the system has been set up and continues to be set up is that we're supposed to know our place in a society. We're supposed to know our role and stay in it, you know? And that's the way that it's designed. But if we're all to also understand that the,  00:23:00.000 --&gt; 00:24:00.000 really the power to determine what our role is going to be in society and take that role on, the power to do that actually lies within ourselves to make that determination and to and stand by it, you know? And so that's where I think that this program really hit the nail on the head and really delivered that message. And the other thing, too, is that it's one of those things where I was watching--in watching the show,  00:24:00.000 --&gt; 00:25:00.000 it made me think about my grandfather, right? And I had to go back and really think about what the kinds of things that my grandparents would say about their experiences and what their attitudes were. You know, what about this society and about what was and was not possible, all kinds of stuff, right? And in doing that, I actually just on a whim typed my grandfather's name into Google and looked up  00:25:00.000 --&gt; 00:26:00.000 --and was trying to look up and see if there was any information there about him and about that time, and in doing so, I came across an article that was about my great-grandmother in the LA (Los Angeles) Times. And the article was really just a human interest piece that was talking about her because she had turned a hundred and really, in coming to California, that's where a lot of family just actually just came from her and is in the Los Angeles area as a result.  00:26:00.000 --&gt; 00:27:00.000 And there was one part in there where they were talking to her, and she was talking about coming to California and how--from the deep South--and how that, and how, in some ways what she experienced in California was worse than what she experienced in the deep South. And that's where it--that show really resonated because that's what the show is centered on. Centered on Black people coming to California from the South. And moving into neighborhoods that are  00:27:00.000 --&gt; 00:28:00.000 predominantly, if not all white. And how they were and how they were received. And so I can--it gave a picture as to what may have been behind that statement, you know? Yeah. So-- Jenkins: I’ll try it. I will, but 'cause my grandma, she also had a similar experience. She came from Seattle to California around the fifties. And so, but she lived in like a Black area. She, yeah. Gilmore: Okay. Jenkins: How has Black social justice and activism such as the Civil Rights Movement, feminism, the natural hair movement, and Black Lives Matter affected you?  00:28:00.000 --&gt; 00:29:00.000   Hmm. How has it affected me?  Jenkins: Yes.  Gilmore: You know, I'll tell you what, when I was in school, I was very much involved in social justice and activism on our campus at Washington State. I would also say that when it comes to  00:29:00.000 --&gt; 00:30:00.000 my life beyond college, it has taken on a different form than the activism that I was involved in when I was a student in school. And the form that it is taken on has been more so in my work, right? And so we can look at that basically, given that I've been in education, it's been more about empowerment through education, and that has actually been a philosophy that I have,  00:30:00.000 --&gt; 00:31:00.000 that has, that has grounded in my work. That philosophy of empowerment through education has grounded my work. And that would be through math, through writing, through--and really through looking at ourselves and looking at our history and where we come from and also looking at the possibilities of where we can go and--if we so desire and how to get there. And that's where I would say that connecting the students to resources, helping students to see that  00:31:00.000 --&gt; 00:32:00.000 what they may have thought was out of reach when it comes to their education is actually actually tangible. It's possible to learn this stuff. And one of the things--we talk a lot about impostor syndrome. That's something, that's a term that I've heard used quite a bit when it comes to people not realizing or understanding that they can actually learn what's there and that it's not a reflection of their intelligence or ability that they struggle with certain  00:32:00.000 --&gt; 00:33:00.000 material because the thing is that when it comes down to it, say for instance, we struggling with math, right? And I've heard so many students saying that I'm just not good at math. Right? And the thing to understand there is that there's no such thing as not being good at math. The thing to understand is that you are in school and in being in school, you're here to learn. And the fact that you don't know the information that is being presented to you in the classroom--is not--that's the way it's supposed to be, right? Because you're here to learn it, you know? And so you're not going into the classroom already knowing how to do what they're presenting to you.  00:33:00.000 --&gt; 00:34:00.000 Otherwise you're wasting your time. If you're just sitting there to showcase that you know how to do stuff that--and and basically pay him money to take a class, to show you how to do stuff that you already know how to do, you know? And so that is--that has been what a large part of what I've done after college. One thing, for instance, was at Washington State, I was Director of the Freshman Seminar Program at Washington State for a while. And while I was doing that I was called by the athletics department. Right? And they had all these football players  00:34:00.000 --&gt; 00:35:00.000 during the summertime who were taking a math course that they were failing. And in order to be eligible to play in the fall, they absolutely had to pass this class. And so they called me in to help them pass the--help them with the math and to help them pass the class. And so I did that and what we ended up doing was we ended up addressing the concepts that they were being presented in that class. And as they  address those concepts, they gained, they started gaining understanding of how these things work, of how the concepts that they were being presented with work and on how to use those--and how and when to use the different concepts that they were being given  00:35:00.000 --&gt; 00:36:00.000 and what they ended up discovering was that the knowledge that they had previously thought was unreachable and was out of--and unattainable was actually accessible and that all they had to do was the learning, right? And so coming to that understanding that just because I don't know what's--what this is all about going into it, doesn't mean that I can't learn it. Right? And what you ended up seeing was that with this, in this classroom full of football players, who I was working with, who are majority Black, finding out that that knowledge was accessible and actually coming to that understanding of what this  00:36:00.000 --&gt; 00:37:00.000 education was all about, what you saw them do after that experience was consider the possibilities for their own lives and start to see that, well, Hey, maybe I can be a doctor, or maybe I can be an engineer. And what you saw was you saw these students changing their majors from general studies, or from social sciences, just anything that they had signed up for because they were told that it was going to be easier for them to do while they were playing football and change their majors to physics or to engineering or to pre-med and--or other fields that they thought might be  00:37:00.000 --&gt; 00:38:00.000 of interest or might--that they might want to go into. And that was that empowerment, right? To where it's like coming to that understanding then they ended up really taking a look at their own lives and their own direction and determining where they were going to go. And for the next few years after that I would see those same students, those same football players, progressing through the different levels of math. They started out at the class that I was helping them with was considered a remedial math course, right? And in taking that class, they then  00:38:00.000 --&gt; 00:39:00.000 advanced to the next level and then to the next level. And were taking calculus two, calculus three, depending on what their major was asking for and approaching it from that standpoint of learning. And to this day, a couple of those students are actually doctors to that--medical doctors. There's, another one that I know of who did and end up becoming an engineer and then there was, I think there were a couple others who went into business and actually started their own businesses and are successful in doing so. So that's what I'm talking about when it comes to empowerment through education. And even when I got here  00:39:00.000 --&gt; 00:40:00.000 at Cal State San Marcos that was the thing that I was brought into address. I was brought into address math and writing. And in particular, those students who were coming into the university with a knowledge foundation that was below the college level, so it was a matter of helping those students to get up to speed with what they needed to know to do--to be successful in school. Right? And that's what I did. And that was actually one of the things that I had told--that I would tell students as they came into the university. And I would tell these students and you would see it, too, when it came down to actually talking to the students, what, you  00:40:00.000 --&gt; 00:41:00.000 would see that in orientation, when they dismissed the students who did not need to attend the discussion on what was called remedial math or writing, then the students who were left were largely Black and Latino. And on any given day, that would--orientation day, when I would speak to the students, it would be the case. And that's the thing that I would that I will conclude with when I would talk to them, after telling them about the requirements, after telling them about the classes that they would have to take, and addressing all of those things.  00:41:00.000 --&gt; 00:42:00.000   I would tell them to take a look at the name badges, where their test scores were printed out--the placement scores--and where the classes that they would have to take were listed and the--their requirement for early start was on there as well. And I would tell them that this is the most important thing that I was going to tell them out of that whole presentation. And in looking at that, their name badges with their test scores in those classes, I would tell them those scores and those classes are not a reflection of your intelligence, nor are they a reflection of your ability, but they are a reflection of what you know and what you don't know right now. And all of that that I just presented  00:42:00.000 --&gt; 00:43:00.000 is, it's about what you are required to learn and to understand that when you are learning new knowledge, that that learning experience is supposed to be a struggle. And so the fact that you may have struggled with math and writing in the past, that does not mean that you are not good at it. It just means that you've come across some knowledge that you don't know right now, but you can learn it and that we're here to support you in learning it. And as a result of that, seeing countless students go through, starting at the, from the lowest levels of math and go on into, going into fields that they thought were not accessible to them just like the, those football players. Same with students who were, who needed  00:43:00.000 --&gt; 00:44:00.000 a stronger foundation in writing, same kind of thing. And in doing so, helping them to think about what it was that they wanted to do and how it is that they can leverage what they were learning in the classroom to actually do those things that they wanted to do, you know? So that was the, that was what, has been in large part what my experience has been since leaving the state of Washington. There's been more and, as you know, I was a part of actually helping to establish the Black Student Center here at Cal State San Marcos, as well. And so when, that was  00:44:00.000 --&gt; 00:45:00.000 in large part from the, from an administrative standpoint, but at the same time also setting the tone from an educational standpoint as to what the Center was to, what it was to be about, which was education, right? And learning and advancing yourself to go back into the community and build up the community. And so, when they were, there were quite a few things that we did to actually do that through the Black Student Center. One, I would say, was through  00:45:00.000 --&gt; 00:46:00.000 a lot of the educational events that we put on. One of those events was that we brought a panel of Black Panthers to the University to speak on their experiences and what that was all about. And we also had a photography display up in the Library, where you had all these pictures of Black Panthers and narratives where they were telling their stories and their experiences in the movement. We also had an event where we, what we brought the founder of Kwanzaa to the University to preside over the Kwanzaa ceremony and to also educate us on where it came from  00:46:00.000 --&gt; 00:47:00.000 and why it was, why was it established here in this country. We also brought in some people who, from Tulsa, Oklahoma, to talk about the Tulsa Massacre you know where--and I'm sure you've probably heard you, you're probably knowledgeable of that history. And it was those kinds of things that we did to really create a learning environment about the Black experience, as well as establishing a forum  00:47:00.000 --&gt; 00:48:00.000 within the Black Student Center for students to exchange knowledge and also to learn from each other with what they were learning in the classroom and to help uplift each other in that sense. Another thing that we did was to also address the Black experience, whether that be in general or whether that be on this campus. And to really help students to come to an understanding of what it is that they're going through, and what it is that is happening with them  00:48:00.000 --&gt; 00:49:00.000 when it comes to stress, when it comes to their interactions with others, and to understand that what they may be experiencing is not abnormal, and that there are many of us, have, and do experience the same things. You know, we brought in a psychologist from Student Health and Counseling Services to come in and talk about Black stress and how as Black people, there is so much that we carry around on a daily basis that  00:49:00.000 --&gt; 00:50:00.000 is a huge contributor to the high blood pressure that many of us experience to the hypertension that many of us experience and into our general health. And so those are the kinds of things that we did with the, in establishing the Black Student Center. Jenkins: That definitely goes into my next questions that are all centered on the Black Student Center. So you touched on, kind of what, how, what you guys have done now that it's already created, but what role did you play in the beginning or the creation of the Black Student Center? Gilmore: So the Black Student Center was actually established in my area,  00:50:00.000 --&gt; 00:51:00.000 which is Student Academic Support Services. Right? And so, you know Dr. Cole-Avent, right? Oh, you don't know Dr. Cole-Avent--  Jenkins: --I'm new, I'm like very new. Like I started fall 2020, so we've already, we've been in, quarantine and Zoom school, so I haven't gotten to know anybody in any fundamental way. Gilmore: Sure. Okay. So, but you know, Mr. Rawlins, John Rawlins? Jenkins: Yes. I met him and I also met Jake (Northington). Gilmore Okay. So Dr. Cole-Avent is Mr. Rawlins' direct supervisor. Right? And so I was  00:51:00.000 --&gt; 00:52:00.000 essentially, when the Black Student Center was established, I was in that role, to where the Black Student Center, the Director of the Black Student Center reported to me. Right? And so in establishing the Black Student Center, the, like I had mentioned, the way in which I wanted to approach it was from more of an educational standpoint, more of a educational success standpoint. And with that, with that success, with the end goal of that success, actually being what I previously mentioned about being employed upon graduation and going out into the community and thriving in the community, and  00:52:00.000 --&gt; 00:53:00.000 being that mover and shaker in this society. So that was the role that I played in the establishment of the Black Student Center. Jenkins: Okay. Had you seen a push for the creation of a center before? Gilmore: Had I done what? Jenkins: Had you seen a push for a center before it was created? Gilmore: Yes, actually. And when I was, I was actually at the forum where the president, our previous president, President Haynes, was speaking about the--she was speaking, I believe she may have been being, giving an update on the campus budget to the campus community. And  00:53:00.000 --&gt; 00:54:00.000 there were some Black students who came to that meeting and essentially expressed the need and the desire for a Black Student Center on this campus. And so the president had informed the students that she was open to it and that and that they needed to submit a formal request. And so in the background, I was helping the students who were working on that formal request with the information that they needed to support that request. And so  00:54:00.000 --&gt; 00:55:00.000 more information about the Black experience on this campus. And how students were performing in their classes on this campus and what a Black Student Center would do to bolster the success of Black students at CSUSM. Jenkins: It definitely sounds like you were one of the leaders in the creation of the Black Student Center. Were there anyone that worked on this project and their contributions, including any unsung heroes we may not know about? Gilmore: There were quite a few, and so  00:55:00.000 --&gt; 00:56:00.000 I would say a lot of the people who were involved in the and actually establishing the Black Student Center at Cal State San Marcos are  listed on the website under the history of the Black Student Center. So you can find a lot of the names there. As far as unsung heroes are concerned, I would say that there were quite a few faculty and staff who worked  00:56:00.000 --&gt; 00:57:00.000 in the background in supporting the students to help them get the Center established, you know? And so this was in large part, it was a student-driven thing. Establishing a Black Student Center, it was definitely student driven, but at the same time, it was supported and--it was supported by a lot of our Black faculty and staff on this campus. Jenkins: Okay, awesome. What did the university administration communicate was their vision? You kind of already touched on this, that it was  00:57:00.000 --&gt; 00:58:00.000 mainly education. And was there anything else that they envisioned? Gilmore: Yes. Let me, I'll tell you what, when it comes to the vision, right? I would say that student success was a large part of that. So students actually being successful in their classes and also going on into careers.  00:58:00.000 --&gt; 00:59:00.000 That was a large part of it being in my area ;  whereas, the other piece that they really wanted to be more emphasized was the student engagement piece and the student involvement piece, right? And so that's where you have it moving from Student Academic Support Services over to Student Life. And so now the emphasis, at least in the vision of the institution,  00:59:00.000 --&gt; 01:00:00.000 really wanted to make this more, make the students, the Black Student Center, have more of a student engagement and student life emphasis. I don't--and that's not to say that there's no interest in student success and that that educational aspect is not is no longer a part of that part of that vision. But that's the vision that the institution really wanted to emphasize was the student life and student involvement aspect. Jenkins: Okay. When it came to the creation of the BSC, was there external or institutional pushback, and did you  01:00:00.000 --&gt; 01:01:00.000 experience or witness any pushback on the creation of the Center within the Center or on social media? Gilmore: Well, I can answer the social media question right now. And that is that I didn't see anything on social media for the simple fact that I'm not on social media, so I try to keep my digital footprint pretty light. So I can't speak to what may have been going on social media. But one thing that I can say that I heard repeatedly was doesn't establishing a Black Student Center doesn't that, isn't that encourage more division and more in isolation of our Black students instead of folding them into the fabric  01:01:00.000 --&gt; 01:02:00.000 of the entire campus community? And if we're going to have a Black Student Center, then why not a white student center? That was another thing that I heard. And then another thing that I heard was a worry that other groups might want a center as well. So what if the Asian students start asking for a center and all that kind of stuff and that was the, those were the type--kinds of things that I heard when it came to pushback.  01:02:00.000 --&gt; 01:03:00.000 Yeah. I would just leave it at that, that was, those were the kinds of things that I heard. Jenkins: Okay. Were you at the BSC's grand opening? Gilmore: I was. Jenkins: Okay. What was your experience? Gilmore: I thought that it was a great experience. It was very celebratory experience. There were a lot of people who came out from the community and a lot of different constituents from our community in the area. Were very pleased to see this, the Black Student Center opening, and were actually very involved in what was going on in the Center. And it was one of those things where  01:03:00.000 --&gt; 01:04:00.000 it opened the door to connect with a lot of people in our local service area to interact with our students. And, like one of the things, when you were talking about vision, one of the things we really wanted to do was to create relationships with the schools within our local service area, which extends from San Diego up to Riverside and Orange County. So we were in, we were engaging with schools as far out as  01:04:00.000 --&gt; 01:05:00.000 Hemet and connecting with the BSU’s (Black Student Unions) that they had out there and in, Hemet, Murrieta, and Menifee, and going into Poway and right here in San Marcos and Oceanside and all over the local service area. And we were connecting with Black students and with Black community organizations and with the teachers and administrators and counselors who were working with the different student groups to really establish that connection in an attempt to  01:05:00.000 --&gt; 01:06:00.000 create a pipeline into the University from those entities. And so that was a big part of it. Another part of it was in connecting with community members, one of the things that we also wanted to establish was a pipeline out of the University. And so what we wanted to do was to bring in various community members in different--in a wide range of professions--to come in and talk to the students and provide the, provide insight into different careers  01:06:00.000 --&gt; 01:07:00.000 and in different professional fields for the students to be able to see themselves in those areas. And so that was one of the things that that grand opening really did was allow us to make those, allow us to make those connections and really build on those connections. Another thing that we did was we connected with the North County chapter of the NAACP (National Association for the Advancement of Colored People). We connected with North County chapters of different NPHC (National Pan-Hellenic Council) organizations. So, and have those organizations different, doing different activities with the students on our campus. And one  01:07:00.000 --&gt; 01:08:00.000 of the things that they were doing was in really promoting voting, so that was one just an example of one of the things that the community brought to the table. Another thing that we did was, it was, we connected with the Jack and Jill organization (a membership organization of mothers with children ages 2-19, dedicated to nurturing future African-American leaders), and they ended up having their national conference at CSUSM. So you had all of these Black students from all over, in fact, I saw people from the state of Washington who came in and people who I knew who came in and were a part of that. And it was a  01:08:00.000 --&gt; 01:09:00.000 huge and very empowering experience to see and be a part of. So yeah, those were the things. Jenkins: The more I'm hearing about the grand opening of the BSC, I wish I was there, you know? Gilmore: Yes. Jenkins: We didn't have anything like that at CSUN (California State University Northridge), so it just sounds really amazing. My next question is what has been the impact of the BSC on you personally? Gilmore: The impact of the BSC on me personally. You know, I would say that the impact on me personally  01:09:00.000 --&gt; 01:10:00.000 has been that, I too have been able to receive from the types of educational events that we put on and to learn from those events about things that I didn't know about and so education is, was a big part. Or has been a big part. The other very big part and was being able to connect with the students, you know? And so because I had the Black Student Center in my area then that was one of the places where I would come in and actually spend time with students.  01:10:00.000 --&gt; 01:11:00.000 And I would say that, in my role, student interaction is something that doesn't occur as often as I would like. And so having oversight of the Black Student Center actually gave me the opportunity to interact with our students a whole lot more. And so that would--so those would be those things. And then also, as I mentioned, the connections around the community that were established. Those would be the impacts that the  01:11:00.000 --&gt; 01:12:00.000 Black Center has had on me personally.  Jenkins: Amazing. What do you expect to see next for the BSC? Gilmore: Well, I see the Black Student Center really just going to the next level under the direction of Mr. Rawlins and Dr. Cole-Avent. And really seeing the two of them bring to fruition the kinds of things that we've been talking about here, which is really that student success and also engaging students in those very meaningful  01:12:00.000 --&gt; 01:12:56.000 activities and experiences that would contribute to their success as students and also to their success as professionals as they get ready to graduate and leave this University. Jenkins: (Unintelligible) Are there any questions I should have asked that I didn't? Gilmore: I think you have done an excellent job of asking questions in this interview and I can't think of anything. Jenkins: Awesome. Thank you. Let me see what I have here. Well, thank you for very much for your time today. And thanks for being a part of this project. We all really appreciate it.  NOTE TRANSCRIPTION END  ]]&gt;       https://rightsstatements.org/page/InC/1.0/?language=en       video      Property rights reside with the university. Copyrights are retained by the creators of the records and their heirs. &amp;#13 ;  &amp;#13 ;  This resource is licensed for noncommercial educational use using CC NC-BY 4.0. Please contact Special Collections at archives</text>
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              <text>            5.4                        Cabral, Gerardo. Interview April 28th, 2023.      SC027-36      00:42:54      SC027      California State University San Marcos University Library Special Collections oral history collection                   CSUSM      This oral history was made possible in collaboration with the Cross-Cultural Center and with generous funding from the Instructionally Related Activities fund.      csusm      California State Universtity San Mrcos. Cross-Cultural Center ; LGBTQ+ life ; Education, Higher ; Human rights ; Student success      LGBTQA ; Gay ; Cross-Cultural Center ; CSUSM      Gerardo Cabral      Seth Stanley      Audio      CabralGerardo_StanleySeth_2023-04-28      1:|15(11)|32(3)|47(5)|61(5)|84(4)|96(5)|112(9)|125(17)|142(9)|160(3)|174(5)|192(3)|205(14)|222(6)|240(3)|257(6)|270(9)|282(7)|298(7)|311(5)|323(4)|347(13)|364(5)|375(9)|391(5)|402(8)|413(2)|425(2)|459(11)|471(10)|485(4)|499(2)|512(9)|523(3)|537(4)|552(4)|567(11)|574(3)|595(10)|607(6)|616(6)|627(4)|641(8)                  0            https://archivesoralhistories.csusm.edu/files/original/36df964a2128464e17075f579d463428.m4a              Other                                        audio                  english                              1          Interview Introduction                                                                                                                            0                                                                                                                    23          Educational background                                        Cabral was born in San Diego and started off at Palomar college before continuing on at CSUSM.                    San Diego ;  California State San Marcos ;  Palomar                                                                0                                                                                                                    88          Getting involved in Cross-Cultural Center (CCC)/ Career experience                                        Cabral explains how because of his courses and understanding of ethnic studies he wanted to apply to the Multicultural Center (now the CCC).  Cabral received a position as peer educator and learned community building techniques which he later applied to his job at SDSU (San Diego State University) as a resident director.  He then moved to Sacramento State and got a job in student outreach and engagement.  Shortly after, Cabral moved back to San Diego and began a job more centered around first generation and LatinX backgrounds.                      California State San Marcos ;  Peer educator ;  Palomar Community College ;  Ethnic Studies ;  Equity ;  Diversity ;  latinx                                                                0                                                                                                                    586          Community Relations Manager at ABC-10                                        Cabral explains his role as a Community Relations Manager at ABC-10 and how he is a brand ambassador for the local community.  He ensures that through the news the community can feel represented, and that the news can be trusted as a voice for the locals.                      ABC-10 ;  Community ;  relationships                                                                0                                                                                                                    799          Fostering Relations                                        Cabral explains how he created a segment for the ABC-10 news that has a multicultural lens and provides representation to the local community, building relationships amongst the news team and the community, allowing news to be catered and personalized to the community members.                     Alex Bell ;  Community ;  Multicultural ;  representation                                                                0                                                                                                                    1100          Advice for One Working in Community Relations                                        Cabral explains how one must be their authentic self when building community. That their morals and values must line up with their job.  To elevate ones story they must serve with their community in mind.                      authentic ;  morals ;  values ;  serving                                                                0                                                                                                                    1296          Starting at the Cross-Cultural Center/ Sara Sheikh                                        Cabral explains how small and underdeveloped the Cross-Cultural Center was when he started.  Despite the size, the staff helped the school practice diversity and inclusivity.  Sara Sheikh was Cabral's mentor and set the tone for the center.  She helped to educate, train and encourage students on being their authentic selves in group settings.                    Sara Sheikh ;  Social Justice Retreat ;  mentor ;  educating ;  teaching ;  learning                                                                0                                                                                                                    1725          Living Authentically                                        The Cross-Cultural Center provided Cabral a space to be his true self and gave him resources to come out as a gay man to his family.  It allowed him to live authentically and provided him with confidence that he could use to empower the community.                      authentic ;  gay ;  empower ;  community ;  authentic                                                                0                                                                                                                    2045          CCC Help Cabral Professionally/Favorite memory                                        Cabral explains how the CCC helped him to be more confident in any space.  He explains how his favorite memory was the Social Justice Summit.  This is where he was able to be vulnerable and learn about others who attended.  He explains how those who went to the summit became enlightened about themselves.                      Social Justice Summit ;  Diversity, Equity, and Inclusivity ;  Confident ;  authentic                                                                0                                                                                                                    2304          Role of CCC to Coexist with Identity Spaces                                        Cabral explains how the CCC can coexist with and work with other centers to provide resources for all.                    Cross-Cultural Center ;  LGBT Center ;  Gender Equity Center ;  Pride Center ;  ethnic ;  identity                                                                0                                                                                                                    Gerardo Cabral is a California State University San Marcos alumnus. He graduated with his Bachelors of Business degree in 2011. Gerardo worked at the Cross-Cultural Center from 2008-2011. In this interview, Cabral discusses how the Cross-Cultural Center was a space that cultivated and enriched self-identity.  It provided not only students with a voice but Cabral to begin living his true authentic life.             Seth Stanley: Hello, this is Seth Stanley. Today I am interviewing Gerardo Cabral for the California State University San Marcos Cross-Cultural Center Oral History project. Today is April 28th, 2023, and this interview is taking place via Zoom. Hi Gerardo. Thank you for coming.  Gerardo Cabral: Hey, Seth!  Stanley: To start off, could you give me a, a bit of background and how you ended up at CSUSM?  Cabral: Yeah, so I'm originally from San Diego, and born and raised there. And so Cal State San Marcos and San Diego State were sort of my options. I, I didn't ever think of leaving. So how I ended up at Sac(ramento State)--or not Sac State--Cal State San Marcos is I transferred there after I did about five years at Palomar College. I was working full-time. And so with that , I worked with my EOP (Educational Opportunity Program) counselor and we, we submitted some applications locally. And so got into to Cal State San Marcos and I thought it was a great fit. Felt it, it, it felt good to attend and sort of in the current stage of my life at that moment. And so, accepted it and my journey started 2008.  Stanley: Very cool. Could you tell us about your journey from, from be being a student at CSUSM to becoming a community relations manager at ABC 10 (News San Diego)?  Cabral: Oh, wow. Yeah, that's a big question. (Stanley laughs). It's a long-- (both talking at once)  Stanley: Go for it, man.  Cabral: But essentially so, in 2008, so I graduated high school in 2003, and--and so I went to high school that didn't have a lot of support for sort of students of underprivileged and underserved backgrounds. So I really didn't have the choice of going to a four-year (college). I did have some of my friends go and they talked about their experience. As I was in college, I was experiencing sort of the, the life outside of their lens, outside of that lens. And so when I was going to Cal--, when I was going to Palomar, the community college I did, I did tell it to myself that I was gonna transfer into a four-year and I was going to make everything possible to get that quote unquote college experience without living on campus. So I did that.  So when I got to Cal State San Marcos one of the first things was like, I wanted to get involved. I wanted to work on campus. Mind you, I was working full-time at, as a financial advisor at a credit union. But I felt it was so important for me to get that experience because if I didn't, I would probably regret it for the rest of my life. So I wanted to make sure that I made friends, that I worked on campus, that I really engaged with sort of the culture of the campus community. And so I went--I went online and I started looking at jobs, and I saw this peer educator position at the Cross-Cultural Center. I've always had, I took a lot of Chicano Studies classes, Ethnic Studies classes. So I really had this fond appreciation for multicultural education, and understanding, and you know, the, the, the work of what that all encompasses.  And so, so I applied for that. To be honest, my interview probably didn't go as well because I was in, I was in the mindset of a financial advisor position. I had already been there for seven years, and so I thought like, oh, I'm gonna get this interview in the bag. But then once I started having them ask me questions about like, what's my, what's my definition of equity and diversity? I knew what it was, but I wasn't able to articulate it in a way where it's like, you know in sort of that academia space.  So--  Stanley: Yeah.  Cabral: I wasn't offered that position right away. But I did have a director at the time of Student Life in Leadership, her name is, Dilcie. Dr. Dilcie Perez. She came up to me and talked to me and was like, “Hey, like, you know you did, you did a good job, but you know there are some things that you could improve on in your interview.” And this, this, and that.  And, you know as a, as a seasoned career staff already in the financial industry, it took me off guard that this individual actually provided me feedback. At the moment I was just-- that's interesting. But I really appreciated it after, because, you know, I was getting into a different career essentially, you know--  Stanley: Yeah.  Cabral: --because I had quit my full-time job. And then I went into this, in this multicultural education space. Nonetheless, I got the job. I was offered the job shortly after. I sort of was able to sort of articulate a little bit more my passions and my interest for the position. And yeah. So I did that. I was very involved in sort of the, that peer educator, the multicultural teaching work. And I think it was not--it was beneficial for me personally because I was learning firsthand some of these theories and things that were, that were being put into place. And I was sort of like starting to connect dots. ‘Cause I've always, I always knew what this was. I always practiced, you know, inclusivity, but I never was able to put terms to it until when I went into this role as a peer educator. So I would say that my foundation for community-building and community-connecting became stronger and solidified when I was in this role. So once I graduated, I went into become, I became a resident director at San Diego State (University). And I got-- simultaneously, I was working as my master's, my master's program. And so what I did was I was doing a lot of community-connecting. I was overseeing a staff of twenty-two individuals, and I was really building and fostering this inclusive living, working and live and work space at San Diego State.  ‘Cause I was overseeing the dorms there. And then I had a staff. So really it, I was putting all my teachings into practice. And so that was, that happened for about five years. Then I transitioned out. and I took a job at Sac(ramento) State (University) as the Associate Director for Student Engagement and Outreach, which sort of aligned really closely with the work that I was already doing, sort of that community connecting, engaging with students, really making them feel belonged and providing events and services that made them feel welcome to campus.  Stanley: Yeah.  Cabral: So I did that for about a year. And then that was the first time I ever moved out of San Diego State. So I went--actually , I moved back to San Diego, (connection issue) shortly after, not because-- well one, I really didn't like the job and, and sort of its politics, but I was missing home a lot.  So I came back and I worked for Barrio Logan College Institute, which was a nonprofit in Barrio Logan. And I was their--I was doing their college and career program there. So, I already had this understanding of like, how the pathways to get into college and, and really was sharing with them sort of their experiences and how to make the most of their experiences at the university level. Being sort of first generation and Latinx backgrounds. And basically teaching them sort of based off of my lived experiences. And then (both laugh) then in 2020, right before I took a job at Sac State, ’cause my husband was actually in Sacramento when I moved out there the first time, he stayed. And so I went back there , and then I took a job in Alumni Relations where I was really fostering relationships with a lot of community members, really doing a lot of philanthropy work, development work and a lot of development work is all relationship building.  And I think within this role, you know, as a peer educator, I was building a lot of trust. I was building a lot of relationships with individuals who perhaps didn't understand the concepts or understandings of diversity, equity, and inclusion, but was able to really foster those relationships and really meet them at where they were at. So, we could teach them sort of the importance of that--  Stanley: Yeah.  Cabral: --or at least have them hear us out in those spaces. So that was, so that was that. And then, then in 2021, I was--I mean we were all in a pandemic and so we were all sort of at a standstill, but I was sort of, I was sort of recruited into this role that I currently have now . I wasn't job searching, but you know, I had taken a leadership program during COVID(-19) or during quarantine, and my name was sort of thrown out. Somebody invited me out for coffee, offered me this great opportunity that I couldn't pass up because it felt really great, and here I am! (Stanley laughs) And so I've been there almost two years now, come September. It's crazy to even think that I've been in this role for two years and I'm working in broadcasting. But it is something that I never would've thought. But I have never regretted it once and I enjoy it. I've, I've enjoyed it ever since.  Stanley: Wow. Well, what a story. (Both laugh)  Cabral: Yes. Right.  Stanley: Yeah. Could you, could you tell me about your current role, as Community Relations Manager?  Cabral: Yeah. So, like you said I'm the current Community Relations Manager at ABC-10 which is--our call letters are KXTV for the broadcast folks out there. But yeah, so we're, ABC-10 is a local, is a Sacramento local news station that broadcasts news for three of the counties here in Northern California: Sacramento County, Modesto (County), and Stockton (County). And my primary role is really--is to be the brand ambassador for my station and for my organization. It's really about going out and infusing myself into the community and really letting people know who we are, what we do, and what we stand for, our brand. I'm sort--I'm housed out of marketing and so a lot of my role is intentional marketing, with a focus of, you know, relationship building. And so I do a lot of the work. I mean, I wish I could say what I do in one sentence, (Stanley laughs) but I feel like I can't--  Stanley: Well.  Cabral: --but, Oh, go ahead  .  Stanley: (unintelligible) Say several sentences (laughs).  Cabral: Yeah. Yeah. Well, I mean, essentially, like I said, I'm the brand ambassador. And so what that encompasses is really just, you know, our brand is: we stand--ABC-10, we stand for you. It's really you know, historically, news outlets have always been sort of seen as negative outlets for storytelling. You know with, because we're typically always covering shootings, deaths, killings and things like that. And so we've made it our mission before I even got here--five years ago when we rebranded and we reevaluated our mission and values for the station. We wanted to, we--our organization had committed to making sure that we were the community leader and sharing stories not only in the sense of letting people (be) aware of the things that are happening maybe that are challenging in our communities, but also those things that are elevating and impacting, celebrating the things in our community.  So we, so my role is to build those community relationships, that community trust and share with them that, hey, we're looking for community storytelling partners to not only--because again, we're none of us, not a lot of us in the newsroom are from Sacramento. So it's like having somebody tell a story from where you're from and you're like, oh, they don't even know, they don't even know San Diego like that. Right? If for me, I--when I see the news and I'm like, “Why would they call, why would they call it that?” I'm like, that's not Chula Vista. That's, San Ysidro or, this is Escondido not Nor-- whatever, you know, we start to nitpick. And so really, it's about again, that's what we're--we look for storytelling partners to help us tell the stories that are being impacted in the community. The great work that we are doing, the community leaders, how can we highlight them? Because again, we want to change this notion of news to be all negative, and we want it to be both informative but also celebratory as well . Because again we are part of the community. We are, sometimes individuals look at us as the face of the community--  Stanley: Yeah.  Cabral: --because they're watching us on the screen. And so what can we do to build that trust and to showcase the greatness that it, that is Sacramento.  Stanley: Um-Hm. Would you have any examples of you doing development work or fostering relations?  Cabral: Oh my gosh. Yeah (Stanley laughs). So when I was, one that I'm really proud of is that we--so when I first got on in September of last year, shortly after we had, we got--in the news, in the newsroom we get different airtime. And so we have, we had a 6:30 slot. And so we recruited and hired this young woman from Fresno, who's originally from Ohio, lived in L.A., went to Fresno, and then we hired her--her name's Alex Bell--to have her own show. Almost like David, World News, David Muir. And so we wanted to emulate that. And so we hired her, and I was part of her team. And part of her team was to really, we're launching the show from the ground up. We are building content, we are building visuals.  So in that process, I was really able to talk about sort of ensuring that, you know, we're looking at this show and the image in a multicultural lens and in an inclusive lens, right? Because if--  Stanley: Yeah  Cabral: This is, this gives us a great opportunity to start something that we've never done before. And so, and part of my role too was to be part is, was to be part of that community engagement team with her. So, because I was there and she started in October, I just hit the ground running. So we started in, we started infusing her in the community, really just having her meet some of the community leaders, letting people know, “Hey, we have this show coming, it's launching in August. It's all community driven. It's about story, it's like storytelling and talking about--it's going beyond the headlines of what we're talking about.”  And we're doing long segmenting stories about communities, neighborhoods, groups of individuals, advocacy or advocates in our community. And we were able to launch this. And I think what the the thing that I was able to really gauge as a success was once we built these relationships in Aug-- in July, right before the launch of our show in August I was tasked to do sort of like a--not, I wasn't tasked, but I was like, “Hey, you know, we've met with all these individuals. Why don't we start doing a tour of Alex Bell meet and greets. Let's have her, let's have the community members meet the team, meet her, really have them share some of their story ideas.” Because that's what we look for, right?  Stanley: Um-hmm.  Cabral: Because, like story, we're always getting--we're getting emails constantly about story ideas, of what we could do, what we can cover, good, bad and the ugly. And so we did this. And so I worked with a lot of my community partners that I had fostered and built relationships with. And we were able to do six meet and greets throughout the, without--within the region of Sacramento. So, in Sac(ramento) and Stockton. We had seven meet and greets that were, that when we worked collaboratively, collaboratively with different nonprofit organizations and organizations to really have them. And probably at each event we had about a hundred people attend each of these events. And these are cons--these are constituents, these are our viewers, these are people in the community. People were excited to see this new face. And so, I was able to really create a a marketing campaign to really promote this event, these meet and greets. It's, they called (it), “Alex Bell Meet and Greets.” Because the show is “To the Point With Alex Bell.” So we were able to really home in on our community and lean on them to sort of share this information of the meet and greets. And it was great. (Connection issue ;  unintelligible).  Stanley: Um-Hm. Oh, oh, oh, no. Pause recording now. There we go. Mute. Please continue. Sorry about that.  Cabral: (Connection issue ;  unintelligible) We were able to gauge the success was-- (unintelligible)  Stanley: Oh, man.  Cabral: Yeah. But I mean, I think I sort of just sort of shared sort of what I did and the success it was for our meet and greets at, at the station. And I think it was through those relationships that I was able to build, it was a success.  Stanley: Um-Hm. All right. Before we get into your experiences with the Cross-Cultural Center just one more question. What advice would you give someone starting out in the, in a field like community relations?  Cabral: Gosh. I mean, I think you have to start, you have to--oh, that's a great question.  Stanley: (laughs) All good.  Cabral: It has to be, it has to be authentic. I think, you know, in a space where you have to build relationships for--and there is a certain goal in mind, make sure the goal aligns with your values, first off, because I know there's a lot of jobs that are out there that you have to build relationships, whether it's because you have to meet a sales quota or because you're like intentionally and authentically needing a certain thing. Or wanting some sort of reciprocation. And in my situation, you know, the reciprocation is that in hopes that I build relationships, that we see that our community partners will feel welcomed and trusted to share with us the newsroom in, in a time if there ever is a need of some sort. Or they're wanting to help elevate a story or a story pitch.  And that aligns with me. I think, you know, I know a lot of sales folks who have to build relationships, but they're building the relationships because they have to get something out of it. And I think that can sometimes be unauthentic or transactional. So--and I'm not saying that that's bad, because, you know, we have a lot of phenomenal sales folks. It just really depends on where your values lie in, in sort. And for me, it was like, “I can't do transactional.” Transactional will be part of a relationship at some point in time, but I can't have it be the sole thing there. It can't be the priority or the priority purpose of my role. So for me, this community piece, when they were just like, “We just need you to build relationships and build trust,” I, when I heard that, I was like, “Absolutely.” And then I, right after that, I asked, “Well, what is your mission and values of the organization? And what are you all trying to accomplish?” And when they shared with me all of those things, I said, okay, that aligns really well with who I am as an individual. So this work is going to seem, I wouldn't say effortless, but it's going to come off a little bit easier for me because this is what I do . This is how I live. I live through authentic connections.  Stanley: Yeah.  Cabral: Through community building. And so that's, I think that's why I've been able to be so successful with my role. And so to go back to your question, what I, the advice that I give is, you know, if-- just make sure whatever work that you do aligns with your values and that the mission aligns with your values as an individual.  Stanley: I like it. I like it (laughs).  Cabral: Yep.  Stanley: Well, let's get into the meat of the interview. Could you describe the, what the Cross-Cultural Center was like when you initially began engaging with it?  Cabral: Yeah. Oh, the Cross-Cultural Center was such a little center. I have not been back since I graduated, but--  Stanley: Yeah.  Cabral: --it was a small room, right next to the coffee cart. I don't even know where that's at anymore. But it was a very, very, very small room. And you know, we had a red couch and we had--  Stanley: Yeah.  Cabral: --you know, it was just like a little space. And essentially what it was, it was a community space for a lot of our multi-ethnic student organizations. It was a place where we put programming together. We did events. And it was a sub-department of Student Life and Leadership, if you will.  Stanley: Um-Hm, yeah.  Cabral: At the time we were working, gosh, in between (2011) through (2018), we had--at the time there was some phenomenal directors (in Student Life and Leadership) who worked very close--who built relationships amongst each other, who then really set the example for relationship-building. And so I know Sara Sheikh was like, she was my mentor. I used to see her as a beautiful soul. And as an individual who really, who really, gave me the foundation of who I'm today. And then we had Lea Burgess-Carland, who was the director of the Women's Center, which is now the Gender Equity Center. And I believe there was Roger, who was Roger De Andreas, who was the current Pride (LGBTQA Pride Center) director. And so at the time, those were the only three identity-based centers. And so we sort of had named ourselves the Social Justice Centers.  And at the time they were all just very small. We had phenomenal, phenomenal staffing, programming. We were, we all were very collaborative and really--in really educating our campus community about inclusivity of gender equity of LGBT and sexual orientation theory and things of that nature. And so, yeah, it was, I mean, again it was (a) phenomenal time. Those--during that time, it was when I met some of my best friends who are still now my friends. So yeah. So that's a little bit about what that center was when we first got there.  Stanley: Well I love hearing about the old red couches (laughter). Been interviewing people, people-- (Both talking)  Cabral: --it was like the blue, it was like the Blues Clues couch, I swear.  Stanley: (laughs) I heard you say that Sara Sheikh was your mentor. Could you tell me more about her? I actually was going to ask about her.  Cabral: Oh, Sara Sheikh, my gosh. Where do I start? Sara Sheikh, she is an absolute beautiful soul. I just--very welcoming, inclusive, meets you where you're at. And I think as a mentor, as someone who had changed their career 100% to get into education I think it's like, there's a saying where there's people in your life that you didn't know you needed until you, until after the fact. And I think Sara Sheikh was that individual, you know as somebody who was closeted, gay, you know at the time that I was working there, she was able to help me embrace who I was as an individual. And to work those challenges out for me, like I said earlier, (connection issue) educating students and doing training and facilitating training. But I was a student as well because I was, as I was learning and teaching, I was learning myself.  And I think she, Sara just had this, ugh, I don't know this beautiful aura of like, this, I--it's so hard to explain (Stanley laughs). I, we, I talk to my friends about Sara, and we're just like, “Yo, we miss Sara,” because she's doing her own thing now with her family in Orange County. But it's like, what a beautiful soul she was and is, because (of) her intentionality and the way she taught things and the way she facilitated was just effortless. But I, we knew that either she al--she always had those strengths, or she learned. She learned that, but like how great it was for us to be able to be part of that journey for her and for her to teach us. Because again, when I talk about, you know, my way of facilitating. My way--my active listening skills, my way in approaching things in large group settings and talking about multiculturalism and diversity and equity and inclusion, I embody and sometimes say like, “What would Sara do?”  Because essentially it's like she facilitated and had these things with such grace, and never have I met someone else like Sara, like before. I hope you get to interview her, or somebody gets to interview her on sort of the f-- the foundation of what she's left, because, you know, I know her. And those, and the three directors that I mentioned started this social justice, the Social Justice Retreat, which was just absolutely incredible. In, in, in, in, in the time. And, you know, people who attended needed these spaces, needed these awakenings to really, to explore who they were as individuals, who they were as allies, who they were in their current state at that time. So yeah. So that's a little bit about Sara.  Stanley: Well, I love that. I think it's pretty, pretty funny that I've interviewed a few people so far (laughs), and they've also called her a beautiful soul and--  Cabral: Aww  Stanley: And also said, “What would Sarah do?” (Both laugh) And yeah, I didn't get to interview her, but one of my colleagues did and apparently was an incredible interview. So (laughs).  Cabral: Oh God, I would love to hear it. God, I miss her voice so much.  Stanley : Well it'll be up in the archives. Once it's up--  Cabral: Yes!  Stanely: I'll be happy to send it to you. Yeah.  Cabral: Oh my God, if you can, I would love that.  Stanley: Perfect.  Cabral: I would love it.  Stanley: Anyway, continuing on, in what ways did your involvement with the Cross-Cultural Center help you expand and develop as a person?  Cabral: Oh Gosh. In what ways?  Stanley: Um-hm. Yes.  Cabral: Geez. I mean, in every way possible. In any way imaginatory, you know, as I think before I got into the Cross-Cultural Center, I was just living, I don't think I was living authentically. You know, I think--and again--being a closeted man as well--  Stanley: Yeah.  Cabral: --as gay Latino, I was, I didn't know where my future was going to go. And I think, you know, again, I didn't know I needed that space until I actually realized it. And once I was in it, or after the fact, and, you know I think being in that space, having Dilcie (Perez) giving me that opportunity to actually be a peer educator too, was beneficial personally and professionally. And I was able to come out as an openly gay man, which is--now I'm happily married and been in my, my relationship with for eight years and. You know, we have a family. And so if--I guess I always question and think about, if I were not in this space, if I was not, if I didn't challenge myself to really dive deep into who I was as an individual, would I be where I'm at today?  I don't know. Because, you know--and I was a late--I was a student, I wasn't your traditional quote unquote, “traditionally-aged college student.” You know, I went to community college for five years. I was already in my career in the finance industry. And so when I was at Cal State San Marcos, I was working with a lot of folks who had just graduated high school, but I was already in my mid-twenties. And so, you know, I was in my mid-twenties, didn't know who I was as--I knew who I was as individual, as an individual, but I wasn't able to live it authentically. And so being in this space, being in this role (at the Cross-Cultural Center), having mentors who are just like, “I am out and proud and this is who I am,” empowered me to be that.  Stanley: Yeah.  Cabral: And so for that I'm forever grateful. And which--and I think--which is why I made it a service of mine to live authentically, and to embrace, and to embrace who I am as an individual of my multiple identities that I have in hopes that I can too empower the youth, the--those new newly admitted college students or even adults, you know? And so, and I do have people time and time again, say like, “Wow, Gerardo you, I love how you just live authentically,” or I love how just authentic you are. And I was like, “That is, that is the only way you should live.” While I'm privileged to be able to live that way, you know, I know not everybody is. And so, it's, it's yeah.  So I think to answer your question on how it's, how being in this space and in this role has changed me: I think it's changed me 100% of who I am today. And how--and the success of my career and personally and even the success within familial relationships, because I never had the tools of how to speak to my parents on who I was as an individual. How was I gonna come out to my parents and tell them? And, you know, through these facilitation courses, of training that I went through and these activism skills, I was able to come out to my parents in a way that, you know, I was able to help them understand too. And I gave them grace too, because they don't know any of sort of like the lingo that we talk about in academia (Stanley laughs), you know, because they don't have an (connection Issue ;  inaudible)-- they for me to talk about equity and belonging and inclusivity, like none of that. They don't understand any of that. So I really had to be able to formulate words to where I was able to meet them where they're at and tell them how I appreciate them accepting me for who I am and having those difficult conversations. So I think it just, and my experience has, has impacted every aspect of my life.  Stanley: Well, that's fantastic. I'm glad that the CCC really helped you in that way. I guess on the, on the flip side, oh (laughs), on the flip side of that question I would, I would ask how did the Cross-Cultural Center help you develop as a professional?   Cabral: How did they how did the CCC-- (connection issue ;  inaudible)  Stanley: CCC help you develop as a professional?  Cabral: Great question. I mean as a professional, I was able to navigate certain spaces with--you know--at the end of the day, we were a department of Student Life and Leadership. There were processes, protocols in place that we needed to follow, and so (connection issue ;  audio cut)-- worked for other organizations and the finance industry. And so I knew protocol of like working, I knew expectations of the workplace. I knew the consequences or the repercussions if: should I not show up to work? Should I not turn in my timecard on time? Should I not follow procedures? I already knew what those, what those actions (connection Issue ;  inaudible). So I felt, you know, I took this job extremely seriously already. I think it just helped me more so--be more confident in having conversations regarding these topics of multicultural education and in the DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion) space.  Stanley: All right. Well so you said yeah, co-- just more confidence. Yeah.  Cabral: Yeah, I would say so.  Stanley: Hmm. We're, we're winding down here. Let me ask you, what would maybe be your favorite memory from the Cross-Cultural Center? Or just a memory, if you can't think of a specific one?  Cabral: Oh (Stanley laughs). What was a favorite memory?  Stanley: Yeah.  Cabral: Oh my gosh (Stanley laughs). There's so many. And I would have to say, my experience at the Social Justice Summit.  Stanley: Okay.  Cabral: You know, it was a weekend, a weekend retreat. And you know, you were committing to put yourself in a 100% vulnerable space. And I think for me it was great. You know, different types of life, like walks of life, walk into that room and be vulnerable and have those conversations and see the light bulbs. I saw the light bulbs myself, for myself. I saw them with others, and just the space that we were able to create that that they created of leaders, because I was a participant the first year, and then the next year I was a facilitator. And forever I (connection Issue ;  audio cut)-- we, we helped facilitate and work with young leaders who wanted to explore their identities and this, (connection Issue ;  audio cut)-- I would say. Then the other one sort-- (connection Issue ;  unintelligible). Can you hear me?  Stanley: Oh hi, sorry. It, it, it cut out a little, but I (both talking) heard, I heard mostly--  Cabral: Oh yeah.  Stanley: You said--  Cabral: Oh, yeah. Okay, cool.  Stanley: Were, were you finished with your thought? I'm sorry about that.  Cabral: Yeah, yeah, yeah. We did.  Stanley: Okay. And I'll wrap up the interview. I like to ask this one, this last question. What role do you see the Cross-Cultural Center playing as it coexists with the expansion of identity-specific spaces? Spaces like the Latin</text>
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                    <text>TRANSCRIPT, INTERVIEW
2023-04-28

Gerardo Cabral

Seth Stanley: Hello, this is Seth Stanley. Today I am interviewing Gerardo Cabral for the California State
University San Marcos Cross-Cultural Center Oral History project. Today is April 28th, 2023, and this
interview is taking place via Zoom. Hi Gerardo. Thank you for coming.

Gerardo Cabral: Hey, Seth! (Both Laugh)

Stanley: To start off, could you give me a, a bit of background and how you ended up at CSUSM?

Cabral: Yeah, so I'm originally from San Diego, and born and raised there. And so Cal State San Marcos
and San Diego State were sort of my options. I, I didn't ever think of leaving. So how I ended up at
Sac(ramento State)--or not Sac State--Cal State San Marcos is I transferred there after I did about five
years at Palomar College. I was working full-time. And so with that, I worked with my EOP (Educational
Opportunity Program) counselor and we, we submitted some applications locally. And so got into to Cal
State San Marcos and I thought it was a great fit. Felt it, it, it felt good to attend and sort of in the
current stage of my life at that moment. And so, accepted it and my journey started 2008.

Stanley: Very cool. Could you tell us about your journey from, from be being a student at CSUSM to
becoming a community relations manager at ABC 10 (News San Diego)?

Cabral: Oh, wow. Yeah, that's a big question. (Stanley laughs). It's a long-- (both talking at once)
Stanley: Go for it, man.

Cabral: But essentially so, in 2008, so I graduated high school in 2003, and--and so I went to high school
that didn't have a lot of support for sort of students of underprivileged and underserved backgrounds.
So I really didn't have the choice of going to a four-year (college). I did have some of my friends go and
they talked about their experience. As I was in college, I was experiencing sort of the, the life outside of
their lens, outside of that lens. And so when I was going to Cal--, when I was going to Palomar, the
community college I did, I did tell it to myself that I was gonna transfer into a four-year and I was going
to make everything possible to get that quote unquote college experience without living on campus. So I
did that.
So when I got to Cal State San Marcos one of the first things was like, I wanted to get involved. I wanted
to work on campus. Mind you, I was working full-time at, as a financial advisor at a credit union. But I

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felt it was so important for me to get that experience because if I didn't, I would probably regret it for
the rest of my life. So I wanted to make sure that I made friends, that I worked on campus, that I really
engaged with sort of the culture of the campus community. And so I went--I went online and I started
looking at jobs, and I saw this peer educator position at the Cross-Cultural Center. I've always had, I took
a lot of Chicano Studies classes, Ethnic Studies classes. So I really had this fond appreciation for
multicultural education, and understanding, and you know, the, the, the work of what that all
encompasses.
And so, so I applied for that. To be honest, my interview probably didn't go as well because I was in, I
was in the mindset of a financial advisor position. I had already been there for seven years, and so I
thought like, oh, I'm gonna get this interview in the bag. But then once I started having them ask me
questions about like, what's my, what's my definition of equity and diversity? I knew what it was, but I
wasn't able to articulate it in a way where it's like, you know in sort of that academia space. So-Stanley: Yeah.

Cabral: I wasn't offered that position right away. But I did have a director at the time of Student Life in
Leadership, her name is, Dilcie. Dr. Dilcie Perez. She came up to me and talked to me and was like, “Hey,
like, you know you did, you did a good job, but you know there are some things that you could improve
on in your interview.” And this, this, and that.
And, you know as a, as a seasoned career staff already in the financial industry, it took me off guard that
this individual actually provided me feedback. At the moment I was just-- that's interesting. But I really
appreciated it after, because, you know, I was getting into a different career essentially, you know-Stanley: Yeah.
Cabral: --because I had quit my full-time job. And then I went into this, in this multicultural education
space. Nonetheless, I got the job. I was offered the job shortly after. I sort of was able to sort of
articulate a little bit more my passions and my interest for the position. And yeah. So I did that. I was
very involved in sort of the, that peer educator, the multicultural teaching work. And I think it was not--it
was beneficial for me personally because I was learning firsthand some of these theories and things that
were, that were being put into place. And I was sort of like starting to connect dots. ‘Cause I've always, I
always knew what this was. I always practiced, you know, inclusivity, but I never was able to put terms
to it until when I went into this role as a peer educator. So I would say that my foundation for
community-building and community-connecting became stronger and solidified when I was in this role.
So once I graduated, I went into become, I became a resident director at San Diego State (University).
And I got-- simultaneously, I was working as my master's, my master's program. And so what I did was I
was doing a lot of community-connecting. I was overseeing a staff of twenty-two individuals, and I was
really building and fostering this inclusive living, working and live and work space at San Diego State.

‘Cause I was overseeing the dorms there. And then I had a staff. So really it, I was putting all my
teachings into practice. And so that was, that happened for about five years. Then I transitioned out.
and I took a job at Sac(ramento) State (University) as the Associate Director for Student Engagement and

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Outreach, which sort of aligned really closely with the work that I was already doing, sort of that
community connecting, engaging with students, really making them feel belonged and providing events
and services that made them feel welcome to campus.
Stanley: Yeah.
Cabral: So I did that for about a year. And then that was the first time I ever moved out of San Diego
State. So I went--actually, I moved back to San Diego, (connection issue) shortly after, not because-- well
one, I really didn't like the job and, and sort of its politics, but I was missing home a lot.

So I came back and I worked for Barrio Logan College Institute, which was a nonprofit in Barrio Logan.
And I was their--I was doing their college and career program there. So, I already had this understanding
of like, how the pathways to get into college and, and really was sharing with them sort of their
experiences and how to make the most of their experiences at the university level. Being sort of first
generation and Latinx backgrounds. And basically teaching them sort of based off of my lived
experiences. And then (both laugh) then in 2020, right before I took a job at Sac State, ’cause my
husband was actually in Sacramento when I moved out there the first time, he stayed. And so I went
back there, and then I took a job in Alumni Relations where I was really fostering relationships with a lot
of community members, really doing a lot of philanthropy work, development work and a lot of
development work is all relationship building.
And I think within this role, you know, as a peer educator, I was building a lot of trust. I was building a lot
of relationships with individuals who perhaps didn't understand the concepts or understandings of
diversity, equity, and inclusion, but was able to really foster those relationships and really meet them at
where they were at. So, we could teach them sort of the importance of that-Stanley: Yeah.
Cabral: --or at least have them hear us out in those spaces. So that was, so that was that. And then, then
in 2021, I was--I mean we were all in a pandemic and so we were all sort of at a standstill, but I was sort
of, I was sort of recruited into this role that I currently have now. I wasn't job searching, but you know, I
had taken a leadership program during COVID(-19) or during quarantine, and my name was sort of
thrown out. Somebody invited me out for coffee, offered me this great opportunity that I couldn't pass
up because it felt really great, and here I am! (Stanley Laughs) And so I've been there almost two years
now, come September. It's crazy to even think that I've been in this role for two years and I'm working in
broadcasting. But it is something that I never would've thought. But I have never regretted it once and I
enjoy it. I've, I've enjoyed it ever since.

Stanley: Wow. Well, what a story. (Both laugh)

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Cabral: Yes. Right.

Stanley: Yeah. Could you, could you tell me about your current role, as Community Relations Manager?

Cabral: Yeah. So, like you said I'm the current Community Relations Manager at ABC-10 which is--our call
letters are KXTV for the broadcast folks out there. But yeah, so we're, ABC-10 is a local, is a Sacramento
local news station that broadcasts news for three of the counties here in Northern California:
Sacramento County, Modesto (County), and Stockton (County). And my primary role is really--is to be
the brand ambassador for my station and for my organization. It's really about going out and infusing
myself into the community and really letting people know who we are, what we do, and what we stand
for, our brand. I'm sort--I'm housed out of marketing and so a lot of my role is intentional marketing,
with a focus of, you know, relationship building. And so I do a lot of the work. I mean, I wish I could say
what I do in one sentence, (Stanley laughs) but I feel like I can't-Stanley: Well.
Cabral: --but, Oh, go ahead.

Stanley: (unintelligible) Say several sentences, (laughs).

Cabral: Yeah. Yeah. Well, I mean, essentially, like I said, I'm the brand ambassador. And so what that
encompasses is really just, you know, our brand is: we stand--ABC-10, we stand for you. It's really you
know, historically, news outlets have always been sort of seen as negative outlets for storytelling. You
know with, because we're typically always covering shootings, deaths, killings and things like that. And
so we've made it our mission before I even got here--five years ago when we rebranded and we
reevaluated our mission and values for the station. We wanted to, we--our organization had committed
to making sure that we were the community leader and sharing stories not only in the sense of letting
people (be) aware of the things that are happening maybe that are challenging in our communities, but
also those things that are elevating and impacting, celebrating the things in our community.
So we, so my role is to build those community relationships, that community trust and share with them
that, hey, we're looking for community storytelling partners to not only--because again, we're none of
us, not a lot of us in the newsroom are from Sacramento. So it's like having somebody tell a story from
where you're from and you're like, oh, they don't even know, they don't even know San Diego like that.
Right? If for me, I--when I see the news and I'm like, “Why would they call, why would they call it that?”
I'm like, that's not Chula Vista. That's, San Ysidro or, this is Escondido not Nor-- whatever, you know, we
start to nitpick. And so really, it's about again, that's what we're--we look for storytelling partners to
help us tell the stories that are being impacted in the community. The great work that we are doing, the
community leaders, how can we highlight them? Because again, we want to change this notion of news

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to be all negative, and we want it to be both informative but also celebratory as well. Because again we
are part of the community. We are, sometimes individuals look at us as the face of the community-Stanley: Yeah.
Cabral: --because they're watching us on the screen. And so what can we do to build that trust and to
showcase the greatness that it, that is Sacramento.

Stanley: Um-Hm. Would you have any examples of you doing development work or fostering relations?

Cabral: Oh my gosh. Yeah (Stanley laughs). So when I was, one that I'm really proud of is that we--so
when I first got on in September of last year, shortly after we had, we got--in the news, in the newsroom
we get different airtime. And so we have, we had a 6:30 slot. And so we recruited and hired this young
woman from Fresno, who's originally from Ohio, lived in L.A., went to Fresno, and then we hired her-her name's Alex Bell--to have her own show. Almost like David, World News, David Muir. And so we
wanted to emulate that. And so we hired her, and I was part of her team. And part of her team was to
really, we're launching the show from the ground up. We are building content, we are building visuals.

So in that process, I was really able to talk about sort of ensuring that, you know, we're looking at this
show and the image in a multicultural lens and in an inclusive lens, right? Because if-Stanley: Yeah

Cabral: This is, this gives us a great opportunity to start something that we've never done before. And
so, and part of my role too was to be part is, was to be part of that community engagement team with
her. So, because I was there and she started in October, I just hit the ground running. So we started in,
we started infusing her in the community, really just having her meet some of the community leaders,
letting people know, “Hey, we have this show coming, it's launching in August. It's all community driven.
It's about story, it's like storytelling and talking about--it's going beyond the headlines of what we're
talking about.”
And we're doing long segmenting stories about communities, neighborhoods, groups of individuals,
advocacy or advocates in our community. And we were able to launch this. And I think what the the
thing that I was able to really gauge as a success was once we built these relationships in Aug-- in July,
right before the launch of our show in August I was tasked to do sort of like a--not, I wasn't tasked, but I
was like, “Hey, you know, we've met with all these individuals. Why don't we start doing a tour of Alex
Bell meet and greets. Let's have her, let's have the community members meet the team, meet her, really
have them share some of their story ideas.” Because that's what we look for, right?

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Stanley: Um-hmm.
Cabral: Because, like story, we're always getting--we're getting emails constantly about story ideas, of
what we could do, what we can cover, good, bad and the ugly.
And so we did this. And so I worked with a lot of my community partners that I had fostered and built
relationships with. And we were able to do six meet and greets throughout the, without--within the
region of Sacramento. So, in Sac(ramento) and Stockton. We had seven meet and greets that were, that
when we worked collaboratively, collaboratively with different nonprofit organizations and
organizations to really have them. And probably at each event we had about a hundred people attend
each of these events. And these are cons--these are constituents, these are our viewers, these are
people in the community. People were excited to see this new face. And so, I was able to really create a
a marketing campaign to really promote this event, these meet and greets. It's, they called (it), “Alex Bell
Meet and Greets.” Because the show is “To the Point With Alex Bell.” So we were able to really home in
on our community and lean on them to sort of share this information of the meet and greets. And it was
great. (Connection issue; unintelligible).

Stanley: Um-Hm. Oh, oh, oh, no. Pause recording now. There we go. Mute. Please continue. Sorry about
that.

Cabral: (Connection issue; unintelligible) We were able to gauge the success was-- (unintelligible)

Stanley: Oh, man.

Cabral: Yeah. But I mean, I think I sort of just sort of shared sort of what I did and the success it was for
our meet and greets at, at the station. And I think it was through those relationships that I was able to
build, it was a success.

Stanley: Um-Hm. All right. Before we get into your experiences with the Cross-Cultural Center just one
more question. What advice would you give someone starting out in the, in a field like community
relations?

Cabral: Gosh. I mean, I think you have to start, you have to--oh, that's a great question.

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Stanley: (laughs) All good.

Cabral: It has to be, it has to be authentic. I think, you know, in a space where you have to build
relationships for--and there is a certain goal in mind, make sure the goal aligns with your values, first off,
because I know there's a lot of jobs that are out there that you have to build relationships, whether it's
because you have to meet a sales quota or because you're like intentionally and authentically needing a
certain thing. Or wanting some sort of reciprocation. And in my situation, you know, the reciprocation is
that in hopes that I build relationships, that we see that our community partners will feel welcomed and
trusted to share with us the newsroom in, in a time if there ever is a need of some sort. Or they're
wanting to help elevate a story or a story pitch.
And that aligns with me. I think, you know, I know a lot of sales folks who have to build relationships, but
they're building the relationships because they have to get something out of it. And I think that can
sometimes be unauthentic or transactional. So--and I'm not saying that that's bad, because, you know,
we have a lot of phenomenal sales folks. It just really depends on where your values lie in, in sort. And
for me, it was like, “I can't do transactional.” Transactional will be part of a relationship at some point in
time, but I can't have it be the sole thing there. It can't be the priority or the priority purpose of my role.
So for me, this community piece, when they were just like, “We just need you to build relationships and
build trust,” I, when I heard that, I was like, “Absolutely.” And then I, right after that, I asked, “Well,
what is your mission and values of the organization? And what are you all trying to accomplish?” And
when they shared with me all of those things, I said, okay, that aligns really well with who I am as an
individual. So this work is going to seem, I wouldn't say effortless, but it's going to come off a little bit
easier for me because this is what I do. This is how I live. I live through authentic connections.
Stanley: Yeah.
Cabral: Through community building. And so that's, I think that's why I've been able to be so successful
with my role. And so to go back to your question, what I, the advice that I give is, you know, if-- just
make sure whatever work that you do aligns with your values and that the mission aligns with your
values as an individual.

Stanley: I like it. I like it (laughs).
Cabral: Yep.

Stanley: Well, let's get into the meat of the interview. Could you describe the, what the Cross-Cultural
Center was like when you initially began engaging with it?

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Gerardo Cabral

Cabral: Yeah. Oh, the Cross-Cultural Center was such a little center. I have not been back since I
graduated, but-Stanley: Yeah.
Cabral: --it was a small room, right next to the coffee cart. I don't even know where that's at anymore.
But it was a very, very, very small room. And you know, we had a red couch and we had-Stanley: Yeah.
Cabral: --you know, it was just like a little space. And essentially what it was, it was a community space
for a lot of our multi-ethnic student organizations. It was a place where we put programming together.
We did events. And it was a sub-department of Student Life and Leadership, if you will.

Stanley: Um-Hm, yeah.

Cabral: At the time we were working, gosh, in between (2011) through (2018), we had--at the time there
was some phenomenal directors (in Student Life and Leadership) who worked very close--who built
relationships amongst each other, who then really set the example for relationship-building. And so I
know Sara Sheikh was like, she was my mentor. I used to see her as a beautiful soul. And as an individual
who really, who really, gave me the foundation of who I'm today. And then we had Lea Burgess-Carland,
who was the director of the Women's Center, which is now the Gender Equity Center. And I believe
there was Roger, who was Roger De Andreas, who was the current Pride (LGBTQA Pride Center)
director. And so at the time, those were the only three identity-based centers. And so we sort of had
named ourselves the Social Justice Centers.
And at the time they were all just very small. We had phenomenal, phenomenal staffing, programming.
We were, we all were very collaborative and really--in really educating our campus community about
inclusivity of gender equity of LGBT and sexual orientation theory and things of that nature. And so,
yeah, it was, I mean, again it was (a) phenomenal time. Those--during that time, it was when I met some
of my best friends who are still now my friends. So yeah. So that's a little bit about what that center was
when we first got there.

Stanley: Well I love hearing about the old red couches (laughter). Been interviewing people, people-(Both talking)
Cabral: --it was like the blue, it was like the Blues Clues couch, I swear.

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Gerardo Cabral

Stanley: (laughs) I heard you say that Sara Sheikh was your mentor. Could you tell me more about her? I
actually was going to ask about her.

Cabral: Oh, Sara Sheikh, my gosh. Where do I start? Sara Sheikh, she is an absolute beautiful soul. I just-very welcoming, inclusive, meets you where you're at. And I think as a mentor, as someone who had
changed their career 100% to get into education I think it's like, there's a saying where there's people in
your life that you didn't know you needed until you, until after the fact. And I think Sara Sheikh was that
individual, you know as somebody who was closeted, gay, you know at the time that I was working
there, she was able to help me embrace who I was as an individual. And to work those challenges out for
me, like I said earlier, (connection issue) educating students and doing training and facilitating training.
But I was a student as well because I was, as I was learning and teaching, I was learning myself.
And I think she, Sara just had this, ugh, I don't know this beautiful aura of like, this, I--it's so hard to
explain (Stanley laughs). I, we, I talk to my friends about Sara, and we're just like, “Yo, we miss Sara,”
because she's doing her own thing now with her family in Orange County. But it's like, what a beautiful
soul she was and is, because (of) her intentionality and the way she taught things and the way she
facilitated was just effortless. But I, we knew that either she al--she always had those strengths, or she
learned. She learned that, but like how great it was for us to be able to be part of that journey for her
and for her to teach us. Because again, when I talk about, you know, my way of facilitating. My way--my
active listening skills, my way in approaching things in large group settings and talking about
multiculturalism and diversity and equity and inclusion, I embody and sometimes say like, “What would
Sara do?”
Because essentially it's like she facilitated and had these things with such grace, and never have I met
someone else like Sara, like before. I hope you get to interview her, or somebody gets to interview her
on sort of the f-- the foundation of what she's left, because, you know, I know her. And those, and the
three directors that I mentioned started this social justice, the Social Justice Retreat, which was just
absolutely incredible. In, in, in, in, in the time. And, you know, people who attended needed these
spaces, needed these awakenings to really, to explore who they were as individuals, who they were as
allies, who they were in their current state at that time. So yeah. So that's a little bit about Sara.

Stanley: Well, I love that. I think it's pretty, pretty funny that I've interviewed a few people so far
(laughs), and they've also called her a beautiful soul and-Cabral: Aww
Stanley: And also said, “What would Sarah do?” (Both laugh) And yeah, I didn't get to interview her, but
one of my colleagues did and apparently was an incredible interview. So (laughs).

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Gerardo Cabral

Cabral: Oh God, I would love to hear it. God, I miss her voice so much.

Stanley : Well it'll be up in the archives. Once it's up-Cabral: Yes!
Stanely: I'll be happy to send it to you. Yeah.

Cabral: Oh my God, if you can, I would love that.
Stanley: Perfect.

Cabral: I would love it.
Stanley: Anyway, continuing on, in what ways did your involvement with the Cross-Cultural Center help
you expand and develop as a person?

Cabral: Oh Gosh. In what ways?

Stanley: Um-hm. Yes.

Cabral: Geez. I mean, in every way possible. In any way imaginary, you know, as I think before I got into
the Cross-Cultural Center, I was just living, I don't think I was living authentically. You know, I think--and
again--being a closeted man as well-Stanley: Yeah.

Cabral: --as gay Latino, I was, I didn't know where my future was going to go. And I think, you know,
again, I didn't know I needed that space until I actually realized it. And once I was in it, or after the fact,
and, you know I think being in that space, having Dilcie (Perez) giving me that opportunity to actually be

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Gerardo Cabral

a peer educator too, was beneficial personally and professionally. And I was able to come out as an
openly gay man, which is--now I'm happily married and been in my, my relationship with for eight years
and. You know, we have a family. And so if--I guess I always question and think about, if I were not in
this space, if I was not, if I didn't challenge myself to really dive deep into who I was as an individual,
would I be where I'm at today?
I don't know. Because, you know--and I was a late--I was a student, I wasn't your traditional quote
unquote, “traditionally-aged college student.” You know, I went to community college for five years. I
was already in my career in the finance industry. And so when I was at Cal State San Marcos, I was
working with a lot of folks who had just graduated high school, but I was already in my mid-twenties.
And so, you know, I was in my mid-twenties, didn't know who I was as--I knew who I was as individual,
as an individual, but I wasn't able to live it authentically. And so being in this space, being in this role (at
the Cross-Cultural Center), having mentors who are just like, “I am out and proud and this is who I am,”
empowered me to be that.

Stanley: Yeah.

Cabral: And so for that I'm forever grateful. And which--and I think--which is why I made it a service of
mine to live authentically, and to embrace, and to embrace who I am as an individual of my multiple
identities that I have in hopes that I can too empower the youth, the--those new newly admitted college
students or even adults, you know? And so, and I do have people time and time again, say like, “Wow,
Gerardo you, I love how you just live authentically,” or I love how just authentic you are. And I was like,
“That is, that is the only way you should live.” While I'm privileged to be able to live that way, you know,
I know not everybody is. And so, it's, it's yeah.
So I think to answer your question on how it's, how being in this space and in this role has changed me: I
think it's changed me 100% of who I am today. And how--and the success of my career and personally
and even the success within familial relationships, because I never had the tools of how to speak to my
parents on who I was as an individual. How was I gonna come out to my parents and tell them? And, you
know, through these facilitation courses, of training that I went through and these activism skills, I was
able to come out to my parents in a way that, you know, I was able to help them understand too. And I
gave them grace too, because they don't know any of sort of like the lingo that we talk about in
academia (Stanley laughs), you know, because they don't have an (connection Issue; inaudible)-- they
for me to talk about equity and belonging and inclusivity, like none of that. They don't understand any of
that. So I really had to be able to formulate words to where I was able to meet them where they're at
and tell them how I appreciate them accepting me for who I am and having those difficult conversations.
So I think it just, and my experience has, has impacted every aspect of my life.

Stanley: Well, that's fantastic. I'm glad that the CCC really helped you in that way. I guess on the, on the
flip side, oh (laughs), on the flip side of that question I would, I would ask how did the Cross-Cultural
Center help you develop as a professional?

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Gerardo Cabral

Cabral: How did they how did the CCC-- (connection issue; inaudible)

Stanley: CCC help you develop as a professional?

Cabral: Great question. I mean as a professional, I was able to navigate certain spaces with--you know-at the end of the day, we were a department of Student Life and Leadership. There were processes,
protocols in place that we needed to follow, and so (connection issue; audio cut)-- worked for other
organizations and the finance industry. And so I knew protocol of like working, I knew expectations of
the workplace. I knew the consequences or the repercussions if: should I not show up to work? Should I
not turn in my timecard on time? Should I not follow procedures? I already knew what those, what
those actions (connection Issue; inaudible). So I felt, you know, I took this job extremely seriously
already. I think it just helped me more so--be more confident in having conversations regarding these
topics of multicultural education and in the DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion) space.

Stanley: All right. Well so you said yeah, co-- just more confidence. Yeah.

Cabral: Yeah, I would say so.

Stanley: Hmm. We're, we're winding down here. Let me ask you, what would maybe be your favorite
memory from the Cross-Cultural Center? Or just a memory, if you can't think of a specific one?

Cabral: Oh (Stanley laughs). What was a favorite memory?
Stanley: Yeah.
Cabral: Oh my gosh (Stanley laughs). There's so many. And I would have to say, my experience at the
Social Justice Summit.
Stanley: Okay.

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Gerardo Cabral

Cabral: You know, it was a weekend, a weekend retreat. And you know, you were committing to put
yourself in a 100% vulnerable space. And I think for me it was great. You know, different types of life,
like walks of life, walk into that room and be vulnerable and have those conversations and see the light
bulbs. I saw the light bulbs myself, for myself. I saw them with others, and just the space that we were
able to create that that they created of leaders, because I was a participant the first year, and then the
next year I was a facilitator. And forever I (connection Issue; audio cut)-- we, we helped facilitate and
work with young leaders who wanted to explore their identities and this, (connection Issue; audio cut)-I would say. Then the other one sort-- (connection Issue; unintelligible). Can you hear me?

Stanley: Oh hi, sorry. It, it, it cut out a little, but I (both talking) heard, I heard mostly-Cabral: Oh yeah.

Stanley: You said--

Cabral: Oh, yeah. Okay, cool.
Stanley: Were, were you finished with your thought? I'm sorry about that.

Cabral: Yeah, yeah, yeah. We did.

Stanley: Okay. And I'll wrap up the interview. I like to ask this one, this last question. What role do you
see the Cross-Cultural Center playing as it coexists with the expansion of identity-specific spaces? Spaces
like the Latin@/x Center or the Black Student Center, places like that?

Cabral: Oh, gosh. I mean that's a hard (connection issue; inaudible) (question) for me to answer because
I've seen the value of cross-cultural center spaces in various different campuses, and I've been part of
those conversations as well at other campuses. But I also see the value of identity-specific centers and
and some--the concern always comes up in these conversations at other institutions about, “Well,
where does that lead to Cross-Culture Center?” Right? Because now that we've expanded into all these
identity-based centers, what is now the purpose for the Cross-Culture Center? And to be completely
honest, for me it's hard to answer because I'm just, I'm not entirely sure, because before we were a
space where all identities and all ethnic groups were welcome then now that there are these spaces

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Gerardo Cabral

specific to these ethnic groups, like I'm, I'm curious. And again, I leave that up to that--the folks in
academia and student affairs folks, because again, I'm not saying that it should be, like we should, we
should remove them.
I'm just curious as to how--I'm excited to see how we--we, because I feel like I'm sort of in an academia
space still, but like how academia or the university sees this: the (Cross-Cultural) Center moving forward
in a time where there's now a need for these ethnic spaces. So I am not entirely sure. What I hope is
that, you know we are like, in an ideal world, I would love for the Cross-Cultural Center to be its own
division, and then have the ethnic centers be within the Cross-Cultural Center. You know, because, you
know, we--and then have the work talk about sort of that intersectionality piece of it all, of, of--with the
Pride Center, with the LGBT Center, with the Gender Equity Center and things of that nature, because I
think they all coexist together.
And they all intersect, but it's like, how do we make sure that we intentionally do programming? And
that's what that's what happened. You know, back in--when we were there, our directors made it a
point that we did programs and we had assigned teams. So, you know, one member from the CrossCultural Center, from the Women's Center, and from the Pride Center would work on one program, and
we had to make sure that we were being intentional with intersecting those identities to include as
many diverse individuals as possible. And looking at it through different lenses. You know, because
we're like, just because we're (connection Issue; audio cut)-- So, like, we were always making sure that
we're trying to like build those, those identities there.

Stanley: Hm. All right. Well, yeah I ask that question to every interview(ee), and they do say a lot of
similar things. The intentionality is what they always say. It's like they need to know what they're going
to do with the center sort of thing. So thank you so much, Gerardo, for coming and I'll inter--, end the
interview here.

Cabral: Alright, Seth, thank you so much for your time and I look forward to, yeah, once you're done,
please send, send that link over. I would love to listen to other folks.

Stanley: (Laughs) I'm gonnna stop the recording here.

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                    <text>GEZAI BERHANE

TRANSCRIPT, INTERVIEW
2023-03-29

Seth Stanley: Hello, this is Seth Stanley, and today I'm interviewing Gezai Berhane. This is for the
California State University San Marcos, Cross-Cultural Center Oral History Project. Today is March 29th,
2023, and this interview is taking place at the University Library. Gezai, thank you for interviewing with
me today. I'll start off with a- with some questions. To start off, could you tell us a bit about your
background and what led you to become a part of the CSUSM (California State University San Marcos)
community?

Gezai Berhane: Well, that's a good question, and thanks for this opportunity. My background is, uh, I
was born and raised in Eritrea, East Africa. I came to the United States as a refugee in 1983, so I've been
here for a long time. But, um, back home when I was back home in Africa, in East Africa, I did not have
an opportunity to finish high school. So, my goal, my aspiration was to at least finish high school. So,
once I got the opportunity to go to school here, I tried to finish high school, but I was adult, so they say,
“You can't even be here in the high school.” So, they kicked me out, but they told me, I can finish high
school, uh, through something called the GED (General Educational Development Test)? Something like
that. And so, I did that. And then, um, I moved to San Marcos in (19)85, where California was cheaper
than where I initially landed in the United States, which was South Dakota. A big difference. And so, I
took advantage of the opportunity at-- enrolling at Palomar College. Uh, I did two years at Palomar
College. Then I got interested more and more in school. By the time I finished Palomar College, Cal State
San Marcos was coming. It was a great opportunity and I couldn't resist that. I had plans to go beyond
the, two-years degree because I missed four years of high school. So at least four years of high school,
equivalent to me was continuously going to a four-year college. And so San Marcos came in, so I became
one of the first Cal State San Marcos students in 1990. That brought a lot of opportunity actually for me
as a new university, uh, starting from scratch. For me not having any other experience coming from
another country and not knowing a whole lot about college, I was involving myself at Cal State San
Marcos because every time they need somebody, volunteer, student assistance, do this and that. I was
just trying to be as involved as I can, just, and as a result of that, after graduating 1992, among the first
1992 graduates, I was, then I got hired to, as a student, I was involved with student organizations, with
Associated Students (Incorporated, i.e. student governance) and staff. So, my involvement led to a
permanent position here on campus. And that first job and things like that was in the Dean of Students
Office. And then by 1993, in the beginning, we were assigned a department to start a new department
called Student Activities and Alumni Services. That is the root cause of the Student Life and Leadership,
the Student and Residential Life (campus departments). I've been part of that since, again, I can say even
though as a student, I started in 1990, I was also an employee or student assistant with the campus. So I
have seen the growth of the campus from day one as a result of that --Cross-Cultural Center, I know
we'll get back to it, but that is as a result of growing departments and services to a growing population.
So that's what (it) looks like a little bit on my background about who I am, as it relates to Cal State San
Marcos.

Stanley: And you were saying you were part of the first graduate, one of the first graduating classes of
CSUSM. Could you maybe describe what the university was like in its early days?

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Berhane: Well, I don't know if you, if you wanna call it the university. We were taking all our classes at
the, well, we used to, still refer to it, Cal State Jerome's. It was office buildings by, near the Jerome’s
(furniture store) building. But luckily, SDSU (San Diego State University) had an extended classes in those
areas. So, Cal Sate San Marcos didn't start it from the beginning. So there was some kind of structure as
far as classrooms and things like that at Cal State Jerome's. So, all of my two years’ classes were taken
there. But we graduated from the, uh, Craven Circle. We had our first graduation right there. We used
the stairs, um, as a, as chairs for the guests, but we had chairs for the graduates, I was one of those. It
was (a) very tight-knit community. We knew each other, the students knew each other. The faculty,
staff, administrators knew each other by name, by everything, and all kinds of activities, including
playing soccer with some faculty members at the Bradley Park. I mean, all kinds of stuff. Like, you know,
if you were with the Dean of students, uh, you just called them by name. you as President Stacy, you
were President Stacy, he’s Bill Stacy's office. Right. Because everything was just community. We knew
each other. It was a community. The faculty, on the other hand, had a task to make sure that they're
building a compatible, very, viable university as a new university. So there was some challenge- they
tried to challenge us, the students, but we were all re-entry, returners, transfers, no freshmen at the
time. So, we met the challenge and exceeded the challenge. Within one year, we started Associated
Students (student governance). Okay? We, I mean, a lot of things, because we were all mature returners
and all of that. We met all the challenges and pa- and way beyond. So as a student, I just felt like I was
so grateful for all of that opportunity. And so, my experience as a student here was great.

Stanley: That's great. I love that all that does, the community and faculty knowing each other, stuff like
that. Anyway, moving on to the Cross-Cultural Center. Could you describe what the Cross-Cultural
Center was like when you initially began engaging with it?

Berhane: Okay. So this was, um, like, you know 10 years or later that the Cross-Cultural Center was
implemented and, and whatnot. Uh, so the department, that the Cross-Cultural Center was under was
named Student and Residential Life. We became Student and Residential Life. Just (to) give you a little
bit of background, why residential life and student activities? Um, in the early, 2000s, the, the Division of
Student Affairs, had a reorganization of certain departments on campus. Our department, the student,
the Center for Student Involvement, which dealt with student organization, recognition leadership
programs, and overseeing ASI (Associated Students Incorporated), ASI elections- was just called Center
for Student Involvement. It initially was Student Activities and Alumni Services. Alumni Services split
when it became, when it remained Student Activities only, we called it Center for Student Involvement,
CSI. That then, like I say, as a result of the division's effort to try to reorganize the division in different
departments, they brought the Residential Life and the Student Activities together. Once they brought
us together, we decided to find a new name for these two departments coming together. So eventually
we came up with Student and Residential Life, SRL. And so, while we were functioning on as a, an SRL,
Cross-Cultural Center was added again, I mean, to that department. So we used to call it “C3.” We used
to call it Multicultural Programs. I mean, C3 was the most popular name for Cross-Cultural Center. C3.
And because the department, the SRL and the office that was assigned for Cross-Cultural Center were
together, you just step outside, pass the bathroom, you go to the Cross-Cultural Center. It was just,
again, even though we knew we were all part of one department overall, SRL. But having that we have

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to step outside and go and sit there and they started it with couches, not just chairs. It was just
comfortable to go there and engage with the students who were there.

Stanley: Do you, uh, remember any sort of activities or programs that the early Cross-Cultural program
were, making happen?

Berhane: I don't recall all the different, I know there is a, a big event that is, I don't know what it's called
now that you do every year, but the, it was more for me, my memory in the fourth floor on Craven Hall
(Administrative Building), on the fourth floor. Uh, when we were there initially it was more, okay, here is
a program, a space for students to come and engage with each other and sit and relax and have a place
to go to. Uh, but it has been a long time. So, I can't say I remember doing this and that with them. But I
know there is something as a result of that, whatever started earlier, now there is an annual program
and event that Cross-Cultural Center (inaudible).

Stanley: So, um, in what ways would you say the Cross-Cultural Center has impacted CSUSM?

Berhane: Well, I don't know if it is an impact to CSUSM, but I know Cal State San Marcos from the
beginning has been saying diversity, the value of diversity has always been on the mission statement
from day one. So the university to show that they are, you know, that being the first center for
Multicultural Programs, you know, this is way before there was Black Student Center, Latino Center
(Latin@/x Center), Native American Center (California Indian Culture and Sovereignty Center), and all of
that. To say, let's start with something to at least say, call it a center for cross-cultural, you know,
multicultural programs. To me, it was an indication, even though it was after many, many years of
hearing the word diversity as part of our mission, serving a diverse community, all of that, to start with
something like that, I think it was, a great initiative, it was. And look what happened after that. Okay, so
there's Multicultural Programs. What do we do? What is next? What is next? And I think it's a great
start. It helped the university start with something successful. Completion of that (Cross-Cultural Center)
led to different centers, as you can see where we are right now. I think that's how I look at it, because
like I say, I've been hearing the word diverse community, diversity, divers(ity), you know, our mission is
to serve our population, diverse population and all of that. So I think it was a good start. So I would say it
was a good experience for the university to start with something like that, as opposed to specifically,
you know, as one of the different centers that we have right now.

Stanley: Yeah. And you say you keep hearing the word diversity, but, would you say that the CrossCultural Center actually did have an impact on creating a more inclusive campus on, at CSUSM?

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Berhane: Well, like everything else, you know, if something’s to... to have impact or something’s to be
popular or to be something, it has to be known to more people. Even though, with us through
orientations, or everything else, as a campus, again it was more of a, campus with no housing oncampus, everybody was more, you live somewhere else, you come to classes and you will leave. So in
the beginning, to be honest, there was not a whole lot of people using it (The Cross-Cultural Center). Uh,
only a small group of people would use it. So if you’re there more often, you bring your friends. If I’m
there more often, I’ll bring maybe more of my friends. But to the campus as a whole, uh, it was symbolic
to have that, but I'm not sure to what, how much that impacted more student population at, you know,
at that time.
Stanley: Um-hmm. What is the, what's a favorite memory you have from the Cross-Cultural Center, um,
and how did it maybe affect you personally or professionally?

Berhane: Um, I think I mentioned this before, when we talked (before the interview). It's more, um, you
know, I work in the office. I’m with the students a lot. You know, many times I'm doing leadership
programs, meeting with other students or with other staff members and things like that. So, to me, the
Cross-Cultural Center was a place to go and do nothing but just relax. Because it was couches in there
and then you're not there seriously to engage in a very, you know, other than just being there to have
fun with people and just chat how students are doing. And so to me, it was a place to go, and whether
it's through the Associate Directors that are working there, or whether it's through the students who are
sitting there, it was a place where you can be free to chat with people and not really be doing work at
that time. Uh, so that was how I looked at the center, in my memories, like saying, the couches are
always in my head. (laughs).

Stanley: Um, looks like we have enough time for these questions. Um, since the Cross-Cultural Center
has a lot to do with diversity, inclusiveness, and like being more (inaudible), I noticed when I was
researching you that you've had a lot of trouble with people knowing where Eritrea is, and you're telling
people, I do remember reading a newspaper article from, I think it was 1990, where you say, “Where is
Eritrea? People keep asking me,” and I just wanted to say, do you still feel frustration, towards those
who do not know where Eritrea is on the map? And do you still find yourself explaining where it is on a
regular basis?

Berhane: Well, in the beginning, before I knew how much students actually had a chance to learn about
history or geography, it was, “Why don't they know,” you know? “They go to school.” We, when we
were in elementary school, we knew all the different countries in the world and who the president was,
what the capital city is, and then in the case of African countries when they became independent and
things like that. Like it’s initiated in, I mean, like I said earlier, Eritrea when I left was at war for
independence. So but, it was not covered in the mainstream media as a country fighting for
independence. So when I came here, at least I had expected some people to know, because we had
Americans stationed in Eritrea, you know, in the fifties, sixties, seventies. So some people should know

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where Eritrea is. So, for me to say it is near Sudan, it’s by the Red Sea, it’s near Ethiopia. And so in the
beginning I was seriously educating people, but later on it became like, funny to me. It is like, “Where is
Eritrea?” Well, the first question always is, “What's your name?” “I'm Gezai.” “Where are you from?”
“I'm from Eritrea.” “Where is that?” (Stanley laughs) And then it became like, okay, I'm not gonna spend
a whole lot of time educating you because you have no clue. So I'll say it's, uh, a little farther than, uh,
L.A. just by Santa Barbara. Oh, okay. I haven't heard of that. (laughs) No, you wouldn't have heard of
that, but I'm sure you heard of Santa Barbara. So the easiest answer for me is, yeah, just go look at it,
(laughs), and there was no Google where, you know, we got the search and things like that. So it became
funny afterwards because then it's like, it's just a waste of time too. And then if you say, I'm from Africa.
Oh, but I've never heard of Eritrea. Well, that's too bad you never heard of Eritrea but that's where I
came from. So , I think I transitioned from taking it seriously to maybe blaming a little bit more the
educational system that we are not educating people even, you know, at the bachelor's level in the
history class or geography. There was a, um, a map that was given, and we have countries identified
here so it says, identify where these countries are, you know, on the map. People don't even know the
United States, the States where they're supposed to be located! So then I realized, you know, it's not
their fault. They just didn't have enough education about different countries, let alone, I mean about
their country let alone about other people's countries. So I don't blame people. I don't get frustrated
anymore. I'm like, “This is funny.” Depending on how I am interacting with the person, I can either say
I'm in Africa or I can just say I'm near Santa Barbara, and that will take care of the business (both laugh).

Stanley: Well, love that. It's (inaudible), just in one ear, out the other. Oh, that's cool-

Berhane: That's good. Yeah.

Stanley: Um, going back to the Cross-Cultural Center, you said that you would spend a lot of time just
having fun in there. Could you recall a time with a specific person or a memory inside the Cross-Cultural
Center that you remember fondly?

Berhane: I think it was more with the second associate director or the first associate directors, and not
necessarily with the students, because the names of the students, again, twenty years later, I'm getting
too old to remember all of that, even though I can see their faces. It's harder to recall their names right
now. But I think it's more the interaction with, um, unscheduled interaction with whether it’s with the
associate director, or students who are regular. We used to call it regular students, but to be specifically
telling you about individual students, it would be very hard for me. And I'll be lying to you and I don't
wanna do that.

Stanley: Okay. Well, uh, in what ways, uh, if any, did your involvement with the Cross Culture Center
help you expand or develop as a person? And how has that impacted your career or personal life?

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Berhane: I mean, (laughs), as I said, as an involved person on campus, my professional and personal life
as it grows, that I have gained as being part of this campus, it's enormous. It's countless, to tell you the
truth, I grew up here. So Cal State San Marcos is home for me. I don't think there's a lot of other people
who have started here and remained here for thirty years. Okay? I just retired in 2020-- at the end of
2021, which is thirty years later, since the university started. So the impact that grows personal and
professional for me, I can't specifically try to address as a Cross-Cultural Center is, but I think my
interaction with people who work at the Cross-Cultural Center, students who came to the Cross-Cultural
Center, and being part of student activities. The leadership programs that this department has been
planning and going, you know, whether it's going there, whether it is supporting the, uh, initial
paperwork and whatnot, working with that group in general is part of my personal and professional
growth. So I can't really say specifically and directly this and that. For me, it's more a, uh, the total sum
of my overall experience, not just Cross-Cultural Center. Student Activities, Associated Students, the
Dean of Students, the whole entire division. And in, and faculty too, as you indicated earlier. You know,
if I have interactions with faculty, because we had to work with faculty members because they were
supposed to be the advisor of student activity, I mean, student organization advisors, we had to work
with faculty as well in doing some kind of orientation about their role and leadership programs, and how
to help the student leaders and stuff. So for me, my primary function was in student activities, working
with student leaders, student clubs, and organizations. So, the Cross-Cultural Center is, has been, was
part of, part and parcel of Student Activities, but my main function wasn't directly that. So. But like I say,
as within one department, we have orientation programs, for example. We had Greek Life, we had (to)
oversee ASI (Associated Students, Inc.). All of those combined are the result of who I am, as opposed to
try to, you know, narrowly say, yeah, this is how, and what the Cross-Cultural Center has left me as an
impact. I don't wanna commit to that.

Stanley: Let's go broader then.

Berhane: Okay
Stanley: Um, as a student activities director, were there any activities that you organized that you were
particularly connected to or the, uh, moment on campus where you felt that you were promoting
inclusiveness and diversity?

Berhane: Well, I mean, a lot of the programs that we used to do from Student Activities is more... Okay,
so if I notice that certain student groups that are not active, that are not really engaged, and what we
used to do is go into orientations from the beginning to say, You gotta remain active on campus. This is,
look at me, I never dreamed of working on campus or the university, ever whatsoever. You go to school,
to college and you graduate, and you go look for a job somewhere else, but I'm here. So, students, you
need to get engaged, you need to get involved. So, me encouraging all the new students that were
coming in, or if they were here, and if I get to interact, I like to walk around and see if people are out
there who would like to say hello, if they're not engaged, if they're not the student organizations. And

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within student organizations, if they're not taking leadership roles and things like that, I encourage
people at whatever level they are. And so that's, you know, for me, I was fond of encouraging students
to take leadership roles, to stay engaged, to work on campus, even at least as a student activity, and I
mean as student assistants. And so for me it's more the day-to-day interactions with students, not just in
generally, I mean. So, every year we know student organizations have to renew their contract every
year. We have to do some leadership program trainings every year. And that's where you meet all the
student leaders, and that's how you continue to engage with them and continue to advise them and
continue to help them grow. And so for me, it's more, it's really hard to say yes, thirty years of
experience is like to narrow it into one event or into one program. I've been part of student, I mean, ASI
for example, Associated Students, (Inc.), we started with paper ballots, you know, like check-in the
paper ballots. Then we moved to scantrons where you can do scantron, you (Stanley) probably don't
remember. And then we had to go move up to online voting and things like that. So, you have to go
through so much growth. And so, when you’re part of a lot of new engagements, new initiatives, it’s like
you forget it because once you move to the next level, you just forget about that and now you're at next
level. So for me, uh, like I say, it's thirty years of engaging with the students, faculty and staff, with
administrators. It was a lot of the, a lot of the things that we see right now, whether it is programs
through Cross-Cultural Center, or through what used to be SLL, Student Live and Leadership, now it's
SLIC (both laugh), Student Leadership and Involvement (Center), something like that. SLIC, they just
changed it. Um, a lot of the programs, a lot of orientation. I also worked with housing. So, housing was
another area where, where you are engaged with students coming in with family, with their parents,
you were engaged and things like that. And so, for me, it's just a, I was not like static in one department
or in one function doing just one specific thing. I have been engaged within a lot of different things on
campus. So that to me is, it makes it harder for me. It's like, as a result of me doing what specific area,
this is where I am, or this is where I was, this is where I got. Is it just so much that I can say I've been a
part of? And as a result, I grew up with it (laughs) and I even got retired, bro. (laughs).
Stanley: Yeah. You say, that you really don't know, like what, I couldn't really go into specifics. Um, could
I ask you to tell me just, just any story that you might have, of helping a student or being involved in the,
on campus or anything like that?

Berhane: Um, so for example, on Orientation Team.

Stanley: Mm-hmm.

Berhane: Orientation Team is, there's a training every year. We go camping. You go camping to Ramona
or to Alpine (California) or things like that. My most memorable memories with the students is when
you are going to those kinds of three, four-day trainings and camping and you are doing all kinds of crazy
things in there. And so for me, my most memorable uh, fun memories are related to the orientation
team going places and being trained. Things on campus, we've done so much. But when you get outta
here and do other activities off campus, those were memorable.

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Stanley: Um, let's see here. Um, could you tell me about your involvement with Greek Life?

Berhan: (laughs) Greek Life? Hmm. So when we initially started the department Student Activities in
1993, Greek life was not recognized as Greek Life. Greek life was more, you can initiate, but we are not
gonna recognize you as a Greek Life organization because first of all, you have to go and communicate
with the National Greek (Life) Association (National Panhellenic Conference). The campus was not a
grown-up campus. And so my engagement with Greek life was more before they became Greek Life,
before they became recognized, um, Greek organizations. It was more you give, they give them
(pseudonyms) and we know where they're heading, but they recognized as student organizations where
it's not supposed to discriminate membership based on gender and whatnot. Because as you know,
Greek organizations are based on gender, kind of like the, sororities, fraternities and things like that. So
their names were not as Greek names. It was more a pseudo other names. We know where they're
heading, that's where they're trying and planning. But my, so in the early days when I was part of, you
know, when they were part of that student organization, they were just student organizations. That's
my experience with them. Once we recognized them, we started recognizing them, then the process of
working with them moved to a new Greek Life advisor. And I remained with the rest of the other
student organizations. So Greek Life before they became Greek Life, yes, I know who they were. I
worked with them as their advisor. But once we have started to recognize them fully, then a Greek Life
advisor has to come. A Greek Life advisor was hired. That's how we kind of-- we are in the same
department, but me doing student organizations, these other person, Greek life leadership programs, all
of us. And then orientation, and then Cross-Cultural Center, you know, all coming from within this
department.

Stanley: Um, you mentioned that, uh, they had to use pseudonyms instead of real Greek names. I was
wondering if you could remember any of the names.

Berhane: I can't. I can't. I'm sorry. I mean, we have to go back to the, the good old days. Um, we had,
you know, documents. I don't have any of the documents, but if you wanna go search what the earlier,
earlier student organizations... You kind of, you can find it in the (19)93, 94, 95 years, what student
organizations were. I think some of that list might be still in student activities or SLIC or ASI might have
that list as well. But it was, like I say, it is very hard for me to remember all of those. But it was three or
four different student organizations.

Stanley: Well, thank you for the reference at least. Um, you talked about, about how you were involved
with student residential life, um, in the same vein as being working earlier in CSUSM. How was
residential, residential life in CSUSM earlier on?

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Berhane : So before the, uh, UVA (University Village Apartments), the university village was built, the
campus had, leased apartments in what we call it, uh, the islands apartments. The Islands Apartments.
Out of many of the apartments, the university leased several buildings and rooms. So we used to house
students. And so even though I was working still in Student Activities, the Director of Student Activities
was also overseeing the, uh, of campus housing. We called it the off-campus housing initiative. And so I
was, I happened to be the other person also to help with that. So it was, again, off campus, the Islands
Apartments. It's off of Wood, you know, in San Marcos, if you are familiar with San Marcos, uh, Twin
Oaks (Road) going east, there is the golf course. Right across the golf course. There's Woodward.
Woodward is a street. So I think they changed the name, but it used to be called the Islands Apartment.
And so even though we were not, nobody was resident in there from us, the staff members, we were
there to support students. It was, I was part of that. And that's pretty much so. And then once we build
the UVA, the University Village, then everybody new has to take over. Uh, even though to this day, the
Dean of Students where I worked overseas housing, all housing. So the directors of the on-campus
housing, I think they also reported to the Dean of Students. And so, me remaining in, within the Dean of
Students, under the Dean of Students kind of gave me an opportunity to really engage in work or move
in, move out and things like that. But my experience with housing started with off-campus housing, and I
continued to also do a list of off-campus housing. Um, so it still is in existence, I think.

Stanley: Sorry, I keep, I keep asking you, but, uh, do you have any sort of (Berhane laughs) say sort of
story or memorable moment in those residential, like when you were helping people move in or move
out or stuff like that?
Berhane: Yeah, it's just, so maybe a fun memories is where, you know, I live very close to them. And so if
I take my kids with me and have my kids in there and, uh, see where, you know, this is for students,
college students, I think for me it's more like my whole family was involved in things like that wherever I
go, whether it's an event here. But fun memories with off campus housing, I mean, there was a lot of
stuff people throw away and things like that. It’s like, you know, there's a lot. And for me, with my
background from Africa. Like, there's a lot of people who could use all of those things. Things that are
being thrown away. And it just-- things that I can think as like memories, okay, they're going throw the
mattress to the trash, I mean, throwing it, oh wow, (laughs), somebody could have used that one. Uh,
things like that. But I mean, in engaging specifically with individual students to say, I know so and so, so
and so, is not there yet. It's not there anymore. (laughs) It's not there. Like the fact that I can remember
the Islands Apartment because it was the initial apartments. We had students who lived there, you
know, the residents of, uh, you know, a subleased apartment, but we were administering it and things
like that. I think those things, I can see the apartments and the people, some people, but not a, uh, not a
whole lot of memory of individuals.

Stanley: Um, how, how has seeing CSUSM grow over the years impacted you, and your life around the
CSUSM community?
Berhane: Ahh. You know, I indicated earlier, I came to San Marcos when San Marcos was really a, uh, a
mobile home community, a retirement community. When there was no stop signs or four, you know,
four-way stops. It was just, you go from one place to another with no stop and five minutes was enough

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to get you from where you are to where you need to go, where you want to go. The fact that for thirty
some years right now, I've seen the growth of San Marcos in general as a community, to where we are
right now. It's very hard for me to believe, to tell you the truth. It's just very hard for me to believe. So,
the impact is from this small community, retirement community, a neat community to the kind of
growth that you see-- even when we moved here (from CSU Jerome’s campus) in 1992, we only had,
what, four buildings? This building (Kellogg Library), Commons, Academical Hall, Science Hall. That was
it. That was it. It was just fine. It was nice. Now to see where we are, even though in, you know, in
(inaudible) there was, uh, something called, “in twenty-five years Cal State San Marcos is supposed to
have grown to have up to 25,000 students.” Well, for different reasons that didn't happen. Economy and
whatnot and whatnot. But for me, I like the fact that it has grown. So my kids can go to the schools
where they went to. Richland (Elementary School), Woodland (Park Middle School), Mission Hills (High
School). But those things, well Mission (High School) was not there. I mean, all the growth for me to be
able, instead of going (to) San Diego State to be able to finish in San Marcos, I had benefited a lot to be
part of it. I mean, extra lucky to be working in here instead of San Diego or moving to other kinds of
states or other cities. San Marcos in general, as a community, as a university, gave me life. Life. Do you
know, life? Life. It gave me life. So for me, it's beyond, I'm beyond grateful for the impact that Cal State
San Marcos. The fact that Cal State San Marcos, when it came time, the place, where everything, I raised
three kids in San Marcos who all three of 'em went to like, oh, I told you Richland, Woodland, and then
went to college. None of them came here (CSUSM) ‘cause Daddy works here (laughs). So they had to go
to different states. But, um, but they knew where, what my expectations of them, they knew they were
part of, I was part of this. And they knew they were not just going to finish high school and not go to
college. So they all did at least their four, the four-year degree. So for me, it is life. My experience, the
people that I come to know here at the university, the faculty, staff, students, it gave me life. I'm telling
you, I don't know where I would've been if it wasn’t for Cal State San Marcos. And the whole general San
Marcos, the whole area. So I'm very, very grateful.

Stanley: That's, that's incredible. Um, yeah, it's just, it's almost like a, it's become like a campus town at
this point now.

Berhane: Oh my God. Oh my gosh. I mean, when I was a student, there was no parking fees or anything
(laughs). Now I have (to) pay, like an hour. You pay my job, just leave me (laughs).

Stanley: Yeah. There's a train that runs along now.

Berhane: That's a different story (laughs). That's a different story, man.

Transcribed by Aaron
Williams

10

2023-10-30

�GEZAI BERHANE

TRANSCRIPT, INTERVIEW
2023-03-29

Stanley: Getting back, uh, as we're winding down, um, I know that you had, you were involved with the
Black Student Union and Black Student Center. How would would you say that pro, those programs and
that, what's the word, uh, correlates or stacks up against the Cross-Cultural Center? I'd say, so.
Berhane: Um, I think what, you know, during time, with time you have to identify all the different things
that you need, who needs what. And so, I don't know, I don't wanna compare or compete or anything
as, you know, not just a Black Student Center, not just a Latino Center, not just a Women's Center or a
Native American Center. It's more they all have their own individual roles to play in the, in, in, you know,
in this community. So, Black Student Center was a necessary department, was a necessary service, a
necessary center to have on campus. If we are going to have specific groups feeling welcomed and that
they have a space on campus. With Multicultural Programs its good, when multicultural, multi-ethnic,
multi-gender, or whatever you call it, in name. It-- but they're able to come and use that as a center for
that. But I think people feel comfortable where they feel they belong to. Just like the student
organizations. When I was a student, when I see a sociology club, accounting club, Latino club, well, I
wanted to have the Black Student Club. So I was part of a Black student club. Uh, we were calling it
African American or African Student Organization, African, all kinds of stuff, trying to say we have
something that belongs to us. So for me, it's not like in comparison to other centers, it was necessary to
have a center for the Black students to feel comfortable enough to go there. And so for us, again, as
advocates for services to different interests of different student groups, to have that implemented and
to see that while I was a student, I while I was an employee here, was a great thing. I was always
involved like I say from day one, whether since starting a student organization, once I became a staff
(employee designation), we have the Black Faculty and Staff Association. I've been part of that
(inaudible) since day one. When we graduated in 1992, I became one of the board members with the
Alumni Association, starting Alumni Association I can say I've been part of a lot of starting things
because I think the need, the need is there and if I'm able to help on engage(ment), why not? So I as, as
someone who was active as a student, once I graduated, I was also pulled to help start the Alumni
Association. And so I think, you know, in trying to answer your question, it's not really in competition or
one over the other or against the other. It's more providing services to the different populations,
different groups with different interests that we have on campus.

Stanley: Uh, yeah, perhaps I worded that a little wrong. You touched on this before, but what role do
you see the Cross-Cultural Center play as it coexists with the expansion of identity-specific spaces like
you named before?
Berhane: I think it requires an understanding of what its mission is, an understanding. So if I'm coming as
a student, new student coming to campus, I'm a Black student. I'm not going to ask for multicultural
programs where, you know, “Where is a multicultural program?” I'm gonna ask, where is a Black
Student Center? If I'm going to join a student organization, I'm either going to ask for something related
to my major or something related to my identity. And so, multicultural, Cross-Cultural Center, the
definition of it needs to be clear to people from day one at orientation. Okay? And so, yes, it does have a
mission. Yes, it does have a purpose to be here on campus to serve, but is it serving the group of people
who don't have a center already? Or is it bringing all the centers together? And so, uh, reexamination of
the whole purpose of Multicultural Programs or Cross-Cultural Center might be necessary at some point
to say, “Who am I serving?” Okay? Because you have Latino Center here, Women's Center, gender, you
know, gender and Black Student Center, there may be a need to really qualify, “Why should I go there?”

Transcribed by Aaron
Williams

11

2023-10-30

�GEZAI BERHANE

TRANSCRIPT, INTERVIEW
2023-03-29

Even though I know I'm familiar with it. But if I am a newcomer, what am I gonna look for? It does serve
a population that doesn't, that doesn't fit any of the other ones (other centers). But what extent do they
understand it? To what extent are they familiar and aware of this service and this center?

Stanley: I guess the same thing I ask as a longtime CSUSM (staff and administrative) member and
student of CSUSM, what advice would you give the Cross-Cultural Center to be more inclusive and, and
get those people who are outside of the lines of the Latin(@/x) Center, or the Black (Student) Center?

Berhane: I don't know if, uh, Floyd (Lai, Director of the Cross-Cultural Center at the time of the
interview’s recording) will need my advice. I'm sure he, he is very familiar with what he's doing and
what, you know, what he sees all the different centers around him, and he works very closely with the
student centers and stuff. So they don't really need my advice. But I think, you know, always doesn't
hurt to go back and look at who is, who is being engaged here? Who is our population? Who is the most
frequently arrival here in relation to-- So if I were to look back at who the most popular, what
population used to be there... more often it is more of the Asian population. Okay. So the Asian
population probably don't have any other location, but the Multicultural Programs (Cross-Cultural
Center). Because we, I'm being honest, this Black Student center, Latino Center, Indian Center, there's
an argument there should be a White center too. But (laughs), that's a different story. But I think the
thing is, you know, a lot of, we’ve got to go back and take a look at the purpose of this center. Are we
serving the population that we were formed to serve and continually revise. Take, you know, take notes
of all the people who have come to you on a daily basis and see if we are missing anybody. If we are
missing anybody, the best place to meet them is at orientation. When they all come in on campus with
their families and you know, tell them where all the different services are, make that as a, you know,
make it as an effort. I used to do recruitment too even when I was a student assistant. Students who
heard me talk about “Cal State Marcos will offer you this, this, and that.” Once they come to Cal State
San Marcos, if they experience the things that I told them; Cal State San Marcos will serve you, they (the
students) would remember that and say, “I'm so glad that you said that. I am glad I heard you say that.”
And I can see, and really, I use that and it's helped, it has helped me. I really appreciate that. So, we
need to be able to impact students from the day one, what kind of services we are providing for them
and why they should come to our department, why they should come to our service, why they should
come to my class, why they should do those things at the orientation, at wherever they are at the
beginning. And so, identify your population, identifying all the different services you can provide, as
much as you can provide. You don't expect someone, uh, search you and come to your office. They're
not, they're not gonna come, unless they hear you say something, something.

Stanley: So, yes. So to, to uh, summarize, make people aware of the program. Make sure that you know
who you're serving and that, why they should come there.

Transcribed by Aaron
Williams

12

2023-10-30

�GEZAI BERHANE

TRANSCRIPT, INTERVIEW
2023-03-29

Berhane: Yes. That's how I feel. That's how I feel. I mean, people need to know. A lot of people if they, if
you don't know it, you don't know it, you're not going to go and search for it. You haven't heard
anybody talking about it. So even though it may be available in your fingertips, this is different. Maybe
I'm old fashioned, maybe I'm more like person to person, but for me, the only way people can come to
(the services) is (if) they're aware of it. So make it aware and be clear about what services you're
providing and where you are located, what your hours are, your phone number and blah blah. And have
'em (students) come. And it, again, it doesn't have to be limited to orientation or one area or this and
that. Could be classrooms. It could be announcements, it could be a lot of things. But make sure that,
you know, you are known on campus for providing services that all students need or specific students
need.

Stanley: All right. Well I really appreciate you coming. I'm gonna end the recording now.

Berhane: Well, thank you. Uh, let me say thank you, uh, Seth, for this opportunity. And I say I'm grateful
that you invited me and that I'm a part of this. I hope I have given you what I know a little bit, but I really
appreciate this opportunity and thank you very much as well.

Stanley: I enjoyed the conversation as well. Ending the recording now.

Transcribed by Aaron
Williams

13

2023-10-30

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