00:00:02JASON BEYER: My name is Jason Beyer, and I'm a graduate of CSUSM (California State University San Marcos). Today is Thursday, November 13th, 2025, and we're conducting this interview in San Marcos, California with Virginia F. Burke. Also present is photographer Vyanh Vo. This oral history will preserve the lived experiences of United States military veterans. Please state your full name.
00:00:32GINA BURKE: Virginia Fay Burke.
00:00:34BEYER: Your branch of service.
00:00:36BURKE: I was in the U.S. Army Nurse Corps.
00:00:39BEYER: The highest rank that you attained.
00:00:42BURKE: First Lieutenant.
00:00:44BEYER: And please state the war or conflict that was happening during your time of service.
00:00:51BURKE: I served in Vietnam as an operating room nurse and in the Army Nurse Corps.
00:01:03BEYER: Thank you. So now what we'll do is begin with a brief introduction. So where were you born and raised?
00:01:10BURKE: I was born in the Philippines when my father got stationed there during World War II, at the end of the war. And after five years, we immigrated to California. My dad was in the hospital for four years, so that's why there was a big lag time for us to come to United States.
00:01:40BEYER: Being five years old and living in the Philippines, do you remember what that life was like for the first five years you were there?
00:01:49BURKE: Yes, vividly, because at the age of three I took care of my brother, and we were put in a orphanage because my mom needed to go back to her island home in Central Philippines. And she left us there in a Catholic orphanage. And I remember going outside and you could see all the destruction from World War II buildings that had not been rebuilt up to that point. And food was scarce. We got a lot of our food from the US military, but it didn't last very long. But sometimes we got fresh fruit from the States and that was always a nice surprise for the kids.
00:02:52BEYER: When you finally reached the United States, was that a hard transition for you?
00:02:58BURKE: Yes, because we didn't speak English at the time. My brother and I spoke Tagalog. My mother spoke her language, which was Cebuano because it was in Leyte and Cebu area. So she was schooled in Cebu, so she knew Cebuano quite well. And my dad—when he was born—he was born up in northern Luzon on the seacoast, and he spoke his language and it was Ilocano. So when we spoke in our house in California, we all spoke English (laughs). And my dad wanted us to learn how to speak English. So he really wanted us to speak English. And in fact, he would pinch us if he (laughs) heard us speaking Tagalog, just to emphasize how important it was for us to speak English.
00:04:18BEYER: Did your family ever serve in the US military or other military service from other countries before you?
00:04:25BURKE: My father only. He was in the US Army. They drafted him when World War II started. So he went into the service in 1942—or '41—no, '42. And he served until he was injured when General MacArthur (Douglas MacArthur) landed in Leyte, 'cause he was involved in the Battle of Leyte. He went on shore there.
00:05:05BEYER: Did that play an influence on your decision to join the military?
00:05:10BURKE: Yes, very much so. My father was wounded in that battle. And while he was recovering, he was exposed to tuberculosis. And they didn't diagnose it for almost a year. And by the time they realized he had it, it had spread through his whole body, just about. And so they gave him a medical discharge and sent him to Denver, Colorado, to the big VA hospital that had tuberculosis wards there. There were several floors and there were many, many tuberculosis patients there. And that's what my dad had always told me. He kept in touch with those men, even though he didn't fight with them, but he kept in touch with them because they had something in common. But he came home with a open wound when he came home. We moved to Escondido (California) in 1952, when we arrived here. And at age nine, one day I saw him changing his wound bandage. And I said, "How can you reach it?" Because it was way in the back on his right side. And he says, "Well, I just have to do what I can." So I said, "I can help you." And so that's the start of my road to becoming a nurse. And I really wanted to be a nurse in the military because I could take care of patients in the hospital when I became a nurse.
00:07:08BEYER: Leading up to your military service, prior to that, while you were in high school or getting ready to graduate, did you ever hold any jobs before joining the service?
00:07:22BURKE: Well, I worked in a nursing home during the summer—two years, two summers. And so I kind of liked taking care of the patients, but they were elderly and we had to help them get out of bed. We gave them bed baths. The nurses there taught me how to do that and how to do—but I liked it. So I said, "Yes!" Now I knew I could become a nurse. So that was my goal in high school anyway, was to become a nurse. So I really didn't have any experience except doing my dad's wound change, and doing the bandage.
00:08:16BEYER: What led you to your final decision to serve, and were you drafted or did you get a commission as an officer?
00:08:25BURKE: Well, when I was in nursing school, I was—I didn't have very much money to finish school, and so I was trying to see if I could get a grant or some kind of scholarship. But, everything was—by the time I decided I needed it, the money was gone already. And so when I was in the nursing program, recruiters—military recruiters—came to our dormitory. And so I had a talk with them. And it turned out that the Army Nurse Corps had the best one for me because I could go in right away. And I was enlisted into the Army Nurse program—so with the financial aid in my last year of nursing school. And after I graduated from the school, then I got my commission, and then went to Fort Sam Houston (Texas).
00:09:43BEYER: As far as the different branches, did that play a role in your decision for the Army over the, like such as the Navy or the Air Force at the time?
00:09:52BURKE: Yes, because I really wanted to go into the Air Force because I thought that flight nursing was gonna be a possibility for me. But then they didn't have any programs that I could use to help me with my financial aid, and the Army had the program. And that's why I decided to go with that, because I didn't wanna wait another year to finish up my nursing program because I felt that I would not remember a lot of my schooling to take the state board if I took a whole year off from school just to earn the money to go back to school.
00:10:38BEYER: So now we're moving on to your early military experience. What do you remember about your first days in the military?
00:10:46BURKE: (Burke laughs.) It was exciting because I'd been in school for 17 years at that point. And, so it was nice to just be kind of free from studying. And it was exciting meeting new people and getting used to the military. Of course, there were things that they, you know, the rest of the military liked to play pranks on you, but I coped with it. I was so happy all the time, and I was—I guess I was a target (laughs). But it was fun. I liked it—meeting the new friends—and so it was great (laughs).
00:11:34BEYER: What kind of training did you receive or schooling did you complete at the beginning of your early days of service?
00:11:41BURKE: Well, I took my basic training in the medical field. They helped us with wearing a uniform and all the rules that you had. We took classes in military nursing, filling out the forms, that kind of thing. And we had to learn basic military. We went on a—oh, I forgot what the name of it was, but they taught you how to hold a gun, especially a .45, because that's what we would have to have if we ever were surrounded by the enemy. That's the only weapon that you could carry. But, you know, it was hard. I was small. I couldn't carry a gun as heavy as a .45. I had to use two hands just to hold it. But it made it interesting. And then we set up a field hospital and we learned all the formularies for the pharmacy that we were exposed to. How to get medications to the area. And then I was trying to get ready for my operating room school. And after I finished the basic training, then I was transferred to El Paso, to Fort Bliss. And I was working in the Beaumont Hospital. It was a field hospital. And I worked on two wards—a neuro (neurology) ward and urology ward—just to get some experience working in a military hospital. That was my first hospital that I worked in after my schooling.
00:13:57BEYER: Do you recall any instructors or leaders who had a lasting impact on you all in your training?
00:14:04BURKE: Oh, I remember my teacher for the operating room school. She was very good at what she did. Her name was Major Blackwood, I think it was her name. And she was a—I tried to remember everything, all the little, you know, tips that she would help us with. And she taught us all the aseptic technique, all the instrumentation for different surgeries. And I learned a lot more about anatomy and physiology, because in the operating room, you have to know that. So depending on what the wound was, you would know a lot more about the anatomy of body. And it was a great course. It was supposed to be a six-month course, but they needed operating room nurses so badly. And it was scaled down to four months, but we went to school every day for at least 8-hour plus—10-hour plus days sometimes, because sometimes we had to go to the OR just to learn how to set up an operating room.
00:15:46BEYER: Were there any promotions or milestones during your early days of service you'd like to share?
00:15:52BURKE: I didn't get a promotion until my first year was over, and I already had orders to go to Vietnam by that time 'cause I had finished my course in the operating room. So when I went to Beaumont—when I worked on the wards—they were trying to get me to think about the operating room school. And so I didn't get any promotions, but I knew that I was going to Vietnam. And so, on the way there, my promotion went through. So on the other side, when I got to Vietnam, they gave me my promotion.
00:16:54BEYER: What part of the military life came naturally or felt the easiest for you?
00:17:00BURKE: Well, I'd been to school so much already. I thought the school room was the—I loved it. I tried hard to remember everything that I learned. And I would talk to the doctors about the surgeries, and they gave me a lot of information that I carried to the end of my career in nursing—in the civilian life. And I've saved several people's lives because of the tips that doctors would tell me during surgery. And I felt blessed in that way because I had a good memory. And so I thought that was a plus for me (laughs).
00:18:01BEYER: During your stateside service, before you left for Vietnam, what was your interaction like with other people in the military or people you might have met off base or something?
00:18:13BURKE: Well, you know, when I came into the service, there weren't very many women coming. In my class, we even had one man that was doing operating room nursing. He had to take it so that—he wanted to be a nurse anesthetist. So the others, you know, we all came from different walks of life. So it was a hit and miss whether you could make a good friend. And I became friends with my roommate because we lived together, but she still went her way after we left the school. And most of the men—most of the military that I came in contact with were men, except for the nurses. And but going to school in the military—I don't know, it just seemed like there were more men than there were women. And the women were very shy. I didn't think I was that shy. I mean, I was shy because I didn't have very many experiences when I was a child. But once I realized what my environment was gonna be, I really opened up a lot. And I was always trying to learn a lot, not only about my environment and the medical field, you know, but even just my social environment, because it was all new to me when I went into the service—all new. Social life, military life, medical life. So I learned a lot. And that's what I wanted to do—and I did.
00:20:19BEYER: So now we're moving on to your wartime service. You stated that you served in Vietnam. What was it like for you the day before you left for Vietnam?
00:20:30BURKE: Well, my family took me up to Travis Air Force Base to catch the flight. And I didn't realize that my dad and my uncle were really concerned about me going to Vietnam because they had been in battle in World War II. But my dad was proud that I was in the military as a nurse. But he was also afraid for me to go to combat. But I never thought anything about the combat part. I just knew I was gonna be now nursing in the Army. So my family was all concerned, and my dad and uncle started crying, and so did my aunt. And I felt embarrassed because I was the only one that was a woman there. All the rest of the guys that got on the plane were men. And they were all looking at our—my family. And after I got on the plane, they said, "Oh, it's all right. You were the only woman there. Of course, they're gonna cry. You know, they don't, have a woman going into the combat zone very often." So then I said, "Okay, that's right." And I never realized it until later though, how much they worried about me. And when I found out that there were some nurses that were killed over in Vietnam, I really got concerned. But I made it through. I just felt, well, I have a spiritual side of me, and I always thought that God will take care of me. And so I trusted that (laughs).
00:22:29BEYER: When and where did you deploy to in Vietnam?
00:22:33BURKE: Well, I landed in Saigon, but as soon as I got my orders in Saigon they said I was going up to I Corps (ARVN), and I went to the 95th evacuation hospital in Da Nang. It was a field hospital, but it was a permanent field hospital. It was made of Quonset huts. And we had three, well, four operating rooms. Three of 'em they used every day. The only time they used the fourth one was when they had something that was different, like a scoping—or what we called scoping in those days when they were trying to do a kidney or a bladder problem. And they would go in there and work on that patient. I only did one person, one patient there. And it was pretty simple. And then that was it. I never went in that room anymore. I was—because I was mostly a scrub nurse for regular wounds—neural cases were the ones that I really, I did a lot of neural cases—brain injury and neck injuries—that kind of thing. And then we did a lot of abdominal cases. We had amputations. And those were big cases for me, because I'd never been exposed to those kinds of cases in the military in the States. So I learned a lot, and it prepared me for my civilian life.
00:24:39BEYER: What stands out the most about your time overseas? Moments that were meaningful, difficult, or unexpected?
00:24:49BURKE: Well, I was really surprised because I didn't make a lot of good friends there, because I was so busy working all the time. And on my downtime, I didn't know anybody else that would have the time off. Because we had a few nurses, but we had to stagger the days that we were off because we had to cover the rooms. And we never knew when the wounded would come in. In fact, they'll call you in—wherever you are—to come and do cases if they got a lot of wounded coming in by helicopter. You could hear the helicopters landing anywhere you went, except unless you went to the air base in Da Nang. But if you stayed around the hospital, you could hear them landing and you knew you had to get back to the hospital. But I only did that once because they were able to have a lot of the nurses stay around the operating room. And so by the time I got back to the base, well then it was time for me to go on. And we had long hours there. Most of the time it was long hours when they had casualties come in, and we couldn't leave a case unless it's finished. So it was one right after another.
00:26:32BEYER: What were your experiences like with the local population or the different cultures while in Vietnam? Did you get to experience that at all?
00:26:40BURKE: The only time I really got experiences, I went on a med—what they call a MEDCAP (Medical Civic Action Program). We would go into the villages and do—well, the doctors would go and see patients and then if they needed bandage changes or an injection, we gave those. And since I didn't speak their language, you know, you had to rely on the interpreters that came with us. But it was kind of simple because since my work was mostly in surgery, I didn't do a lot of work on patients when they were awake (laughs). So it was different for me, but I tried it 'cause I wanted to see what it was like. And mostly, you know, we—I helped the doctors hold the patients when they're doing examinations and that kind of thing. We did a lot of kids and we would try to get them booked for the OR for lots of little surgeries and some major surgeries, if we had a doctor to do it. They had a lot of cleft palates and things like that. And we could do those in our surgery.
00:28:14BEYER: Did you form any lasting friendships or bonds during this time in service in Vietnam?
00:28:21BURKE: I had one friend, but she was on the floor, you know. She was a bedside nurse, mostly in ICU (Intensive Care Unit). So I didn't get to see her too often because their hours were different from our hours, and we hardly ever got time off together. Once in a while in the evening, if we were free, we could get together and have dinner together. And then some of the doctors that I got to know, sometimes I would go to dinner with them, but I didn't like dinner there. I couldn't hardly eat it. The food wasn't very good. After—you know, we didn't get off at the meal times. So we missed meal times because we didn't—we would be on cases around the clock. And so when we did have time off, then we tried to go someplace where we could get a decent meal. And most of the time we went down to China Beach (Da Nang, Vietnam) and got a hamburger or something like that. But we'd have to come back right away because we never knew if their casualties are gonna come in. So there was only one part of that time when I was there where we had a lot of downtime because there was no fighting. And so we would go down to the—it was an in-country recreation area. So we would go down there and go to the beach and that kind of thing. And that was fun. That was a fun time for me. But it didn't last long because of the weather. Weather changed after a while, and then we didn't go—I didn't go there anymore, and it was mostly on the base. And I read a lot. And my—one of the doctors I worked with, he was in the Navy. He was lent to us by the Naval Hospital that closed down. They had just come in country. And so two anesthesiologists came to our base and worked with us in the Army Hospital. And I got to know the one that was an anesthesiologist. And sometimes we would go to his naval hospital that was just down the road. And we could go to dinner there. And that was real good food (laughs). I remember that. I really liked going there. So if he asked me if I wanted to go, and he was off and I was off, he says, "Come on, Gina, let's go and have a good dinner" (laughs). I never turned it down (laughs). But I lost touch with him. I guess it's because, you know, when we came home, it was not good. We didn't talk about military service. I never talked about it at all. My family never asked me questions about it. And so it was like I lost everything that—lots of memory. I tried to put the memory behind me because it was not a good time. And so I didn't keep up with a lot of the ones that I'd gotten to know in Vietnam, because we all went different ways. We didn't come home together. And you forget when you're trying to go home, 'cause you're happy to go home, but then you forget to get phone numbers and addresses and stuff, things like that to really keep up. And so it was hard for me, because I was there by myself. I was the only woman coming back home on the plane. In fact, I didn't even sit with the men in the back. I sat in front (laughs), because I was the only woman on the plane (laughs again). And all I did was sleep most of the time. So I never really thought about keeping in touch with them because we're so far away. We were spread out all over. Most of the ones I got to know were back east. And I was going to the West Coast (laughs). I lived here in California for most of my life until I got married (laughs).
00:33:42BEYER: How did you stay in touch with your loved ones back home?
00:33:46BURKE: They wrote to me by mail. One time they sent me a little tape recording that they made while—when they went to the fair—the state fair in California, in San Diego County—they went to the fair and the Red Cross had had set up a way to record their message. And I got a recording from them in July. I remember thinking, Well, how am I gonna listen to this? I don't have a tape recorder (laughs). And when I told somebody about it in the operating room, they said, "Oh, I have a tape recorder if you wanna listen to it!" And I said, "Yeah." So everybody got to listen to it (laughs). Yeah.
00:34:37BEYER: Was it hard for you to hear the voice of your family members while you're in the middle of a war zone and away for the holidays and—
00:34:46BURKE: —Oh, yes. 'cause I missed them. And, so they only—see, they didn't really know that they could talk to me or write to me, because I never—I only wrote a couple of letters home. I mostly wrote to a friend of mine that was stationed in Fort Bliss—one of my friends from Fort Bliss that I met there. We became good friends throughout my life. And I just lost contact with her a few years ago, maybe because well, she was older than I was, so I think maybe she didn't know how to maneuver—how to use the technology that we have today. You know, she didn't have a computer or anything like that. And I tried to get her to get a answering service on her phone. And it took her a long time because she didn't even know where to go get one (laughs). So I lost touch with those that couldn't keep up with the technology in the later years.
00:36:17BEYER: Did you carry any rituals or keepsakes or good luck items during your time in Vietnam?
00:36:25BURKE: Not really. I had my rosary 'cause I was a Catholic. I had my rosary and that's about all I had. I didn't carry too much over 'cause I didn't wanna lose anything, you know, because I didn't know where we would keep 'em. I had no idea what life was gonna be like. I thought it was always moving around, and I didn't realize that I was gonna have a room to myself and those kinds of things. So I didn't take very much. I took a couple of books because I like to read. But even the books I got from others, because when I read the books that I took with me, I didn't have anything else to read. But some of the others had books that they had collected, we would pass 'em around to the ones that like to read. And that's about all that I had. I don't—I wasn't—what do you call it?—into superstition. I—like I said—I always just believed in God (laughs).
00:37:51BEYER: Were there any lighthearted memories or humorous events that you'd like to share about your time in Vietnam?
00:37:58BURKE: Well (smiles, laughs). I don't think I should do that one because it happened on the beach (laughs)! And I felt so embarrassed I had to go back to the room (laughs). So if you can imagine that (laughs), that's all I can say!
00:38:24BEYER: When it was time for you to leave and return back stateside, what did that feel like for you?
00:38:32BURKE: I was glad because, you know, you get lonesome there. I didn't really have a real good, good friend like I did in the States. I formed relationships at—not so much at Fort Hood, the last place I was at, but from Fort Sam Houston and El Paso, William Beaumont, I had friends that we kept in touch with. And slowly, I lost touch with them as we moved—I moved a lot. So I really was the one that had to keep in touch with them. And sometimes I couldn't keep up with them because, you know, you lose their address or they changed their address. I changed my address so many times. People couldn't keep up with me (laughs). So that's why, I tried to keep up with some of 'em as much as I could, but it was hard.
00:39:47BEYER: So we're moving on to your transition out of service. Do you remember the day your service ended? Please describe what that was like.
00:39:58BURKE: Well, I only remembered going to the hospital. I went back east because I knew somebody back there that I could be with. And I didn't realize that when I went back there, they were gonna transition me for discharge. And so I thought I was gonna go back to L.A. (Los Angeles), but I could go anywhere I wanted. So I said, well, I think I would like to go there to be with my friend there. And, so I, you know, I don't really remember a lot about that day because I was just anxious to go back to California. I saw my friend and we did some things together, but then I went back home. I decided that I was gonna end my military career, because after that year—it was really traumatic for me at the beginning, and I didn't know how much it was going to affect me after I came back, especially with the atmosphere of the society in general. I was almost afraid to let anybody know that I'd been in the military. I felt that animosity even in the airport when I got off the plane. And so some of the flight attendants would tell me, "You should change outta your uniform when we land in Seattle." She says, "Get out of your uniform, so that you won't be noticed because some people are just mean." And I guess they saw that when the military got off the plane and into the society. So I was kind of scared, by myself walking around, but I did change into civilian uniform when I could. But when you traveled at that time—what's the name of that—I forgot what you call it when you travel by military—you had to wear your uniform in and out of the airport. So I tried to put on a jacket or something so that I wouldn't have to show the whole uniform. But some would ask me, "Oh, what did you do in the Army?" And I'd say, "I was a nurse in the hospital there." And, so I guess they thought that it was okay. So they didn't do anything to me, but I saw other things to other soldiers, and it was—I was sad. I felt sad going to the airports. And I never talked about those kinds of things, so I kept it inside.
00:43:38BEYER: How were you received by your family or your community after you ended your service ended?
00:43:44BURKE: I just, really, it was like, I'd never been gone. They never asked me about my military service. My family never asked me what it was like. They just didn't talk about it. So when I came home, I just—I said, "Well, I guess they don't wanna know. Maybe they're afraid to ask me anything." And so I kept it all to myself—unless I met a veteran and he says, "So, where were you stationed?" Well, of course I would tell him, but I knew that he was a military guy. Mostly it was all guys. That's all I—'cause there weren't very many women in the military at that time, you know, like they do now. So I would tell him about things that I would go through, you know, being a only woman out in the field and different places where I was stationed. And I felt comfortable talking to a veteran. But when I—after I got married and went back east, it was—we never talked about it. Most people didn't even know I'd been in the military. And that was—I got married three years after I came back. And then we were in San Diego—there's a lot of veterans—so I could talk to them, but most people didn't—even in the military—they didn't talk. They didn't ask questions, they just kept it quiet. It was like there were no military in San Diego, if you can believe that, because it's a big military community! But we hardly ever talked about our service. I hardly ever talked about it. Oh, sometimes they would mention it, but never personal experiences or anything like that. So I just thought that was, you know, normal. And I think a lot of the guys that had been in Vietnam, they felt the same way. They didn't talk about it. I was married to a Vietnam—but he was in a Vietnam military. He was in the Navy. But he stayed on the ship. He went—he took four tours over there in the China Sea, on the ship. And he never talked about it with me, only about what they did on the ship, but never about the war. And all his friends were the same way. We never talked about it. They never asked me about—in fact, they—some of them didn't even know I'd been in the military. And here I was married to a military man. And so I just didn't pay attention to it. But after I got married, I realized I was having terrible nightmares—real bad nightmares. And I know I just brushed it off because I didn't know that I was subject to that. I didn't know that that was normal for me, I guess, because of what I've gone through. I saw things that maybe a person my age and my experiences, that— I didn't know that. I've carried that burden through my whole life, having those nightmares and didn't know what was wrong with me. I got afraid. I became very paranoid, 'cause I was afraid of things that I wasn't afraid of before I left to go there. I couldn't stand being around loud noises. That was one thing I noticed. And I didn't like things on the streets, you know? And I was driving. And my husband would get mad at me if I swerved on the street. And he says, "What'd you do that for?" I said, "I didn't wanna run over the little squirrel." And he got upset with me. And I said, well—I didn't know that that was part of my paranoia. I didn't know in the—I still cried a lot. 'Cause that's what I did in Vietnam. I cried a lot, especially when I saw these horrific wounds. And I thought about those—the men that had to go back with those wounds. I didn't know how they could live. And I worried about that. (Burke's eyes tear up.) I said, "That was part of my problem with Vietnam." Because I kept that all inside of me, not knowing what was going on, what was normal or what wasn't. I just held it in until I came back here, back to California, and someone said, "You really need to go and have some counseling. 'Cause you have been affected by your wartime service." And the first day I had my counseling, I cried most of the whole time because I didn't realize that all that this was from that time period. Holding it inside, never talking about it, I never knew that this could happen to me. I've learned a lot now in the last—what I've been going now to counseling since 2014. I thought that I was going crazy when I was in the civilian life—when I got out and I started working. After I got married—no, before I got married—when I was working as a civilian nurse up in Northern California, I had run into these accidents and I started having those thoughts again about the patient. And I went home and I cried. Didn't know why I was crying. And I thought I was—see, my mother had a mental illness, and I thought that that's what was happening to me—that I was getting a mental illness because I couldn't stop crying. And so I made an appointment to go see a psychologist, but he couldn't help me. He didn't understand what I was feeling inside. And when I told him that I'd been in the military and I had just come back from Vietnam, he says, "Oh." He says, "You know, I really can't help you because I'm a family counselor." And he says, "And I don't know anybody that can help you with any wartime problems. So I just thought, okay, well now I guess I have to learn to cope with this because I was having a hard time with anger issues in the civilian hospitals. And, I had to control my anger. And I just lived that way. And even my husband, we would have arguments at home because of an anger issue. And I never—and he didn't know what was wrong with me. All he said was, "I think you should go see a doctor." But I didn't know anybody who to go to. 'Cause at that time we were back east, and I didn't know—I didn't have any military friends back there. And we didn't know what was wrong with me. He just knew there was something wrong with me. And it wasn't until my husband passed away and I was—I was single for 14 years before I met my second husband. And while we were going together, he noticed, he said, "You have signs of PTSD, do you know that?" And I said, "What's that?" And he says, "It's the name we call all of the symptoms that you have, because I hear you at nighttime. And see, I thought that I had gotten rid of it because I didn't have—no one knew that I was screaming in my sleep. I just knew that I was scared in my sleep. I never told anybody. And but when I got married, my husband saw it when I was sleeping, and it would wake him up from his sleep. And he says, "I think you need to go and see—and I know somebody over at the San Marcos Vet Center (San Marcos Veterans Center), 'cause I—he moved in with me after we got married. And he said, "I want you to go." So he took me there. He took me to the VA hospital in La Jolla (San Diego Veterans Administration Medical Center) and signed me up for Agent Orange, 'cause I had been through a lot of illnesses. And he says, "I think you need to go see the doctor too." So he signed me up for all this stuff. I didn't know anything, because my husband was—he was a Navy sailor. And he didn't know anything about the war, really. He, of course, he had issues there because of all the bombing they did over overseas, you know, especially in North Vietnam. He helped with all that stuff on the ship. But he never—didn't go through what I did. That's why he kept saying, "I think you should go to a psychologist or a psychiatrist." And that's what really pushed me into where I was (laughs). My husband took me to the San Marcos Vet Center. He talked to one of the counselors. And so, I don't know if you knew the counselors there, but he's gone now. He's down in Chula Vista. And I have a new counselor. I have Randy now. So I learned a lot since I started going to the San Marcos Vet Center. But I went a couple of times a week at first, because I had so much to get out of me. And since it was a first time that I really could talk about my military service, I had a lot to say. And not knowing that I had PTSD was a surprise to me. And so now I try to help others, you know. I tell them my story, and my first day was the most dramatic day of my life in Vietnam, and I didn't even know it. I was going in there and doing that surgery. I finally told my group this morning that that was one of the things that I had thought about for many years, that I probably had those problems because I was green when I went to Vietnam. I had no idea what I was gonna go through. And it was a new life for me as a civilian, and a new life for me as a medical person, and a new life for me for the military. It was all new. And so the last 20 years I've learned a lot (smiles), not only about my military life but my social life, my volunteer life. Everything's new. And now I feel like I'm a better person for it, and I now wanna help. That's why I joined all these associations. I belong to VFW (Veterans of Foreign Wars), Vietnam Veterans (Vietnam Veterans of America), American Legion. And now I can share! I feel like I've shared a lot now, and I wouldn't have been able to do that without those associations—military organizations—that helped me grow and feel better about my military service.
00:59:32BEYER: So now we're moving on to reflections.
00:59:34BURKE: Yes.
00:59:35BEYER: How has military service shaped who you are today?
00:59:41BURKE: Well, I learned a lot. A lot about myself. And I think that maybe I was cut out for military life, but because of my dad and all his army buddies that used to come around and talk about their service. And but I didn't quite learn enough because of the atmosphere of our society. They did a really terrible disservice to the Vietnam vets. A lot of us kept our service hidden and inside. They never let us grow into the people that we are now. I still know a lot of—I've met Vietnam vets that still haven't grown in their military service. They were stunted, I think, just like me, because of our society at that time, when we came back. Having been the only woman in a lot of places, I had to grow up in that atmosphere, and I learned a lot. I learned that men need a social life as much as a woman does. And they fear the same thing we fear as a woman. It's the military service that we have to talk about. And it was an eye-opener for me when I came to join the military organizations and the military support. It was an eyeopener for me. And I realize now that I like being in the veteran community because I learn all—every day I learn something new. And we should all stick together and form our own community. And that's what I—that's what I want to do now with my life is build military communities so that we can help the military community grow.
01:02:44BEYER: In what ways has your military service influenced your outlook on life?
01:02:50BURKE: Oh that is my outlook now! I want to help other military retirees, active duty, give them hints about what it's all about. I've learned so much and then I also can help them in the medical field, because I have a lot of medical experience now because I read a lot, I listen a lot, I still can—I try to keep in touch with the military medical part of it. I read a lot of things about Agent Orange, but what it, how it affected our lives. I've been through so many medical problems, and I don't like taking drugs. That's why when doctors try to get me to take these new drugs, I say, "No, I don't wanna do that." I like to stick with the old fashioned ones that I learned when I first went into the medical field, because I see what those new drugs do to us military people. And I've talked to doctors that were in the military, and they tell me, because they know I was in the military, they tell me things that I shouldn't do, and I don't. I try to pass that on to all the military for medical—that have medical problems. I pass 'em on, because I think that's one of the things that I can help them with. I talk in the group—my group sessions. I tell them what I learned and they like knowing what I can help them with. And so I think that's my outlook on life now, because I've learned a lot now about the military, medical, social, and all the problems that we carry around with us (laughs).
01:05:28BEYER: What message would you want to leave for future generations who may watch or hear this interview?
01:05:38BURKE: Well, that if you do go into the military, join a military organization so that you can learn how you can help support the military community if you go into the service. That's what I would like to tell you. If I had known that, I probably would have tried to join some of the military organizations earlier, because I've learned a lot. You know, I thought I was always all by myself because I was the only military woman around. And even to this day, I don't see very many women that had been in the service. They don't tell you unless you've—they'll let out something, and I say, "Oh, were you in the military?" And then they tell me (laughs). So I like to hear about their experiences, and I want to tell people about my experiences. Of course, I won't go into really big details, but things that could help them be supported or to help them live their life the way they want to. I try to help them. I go to Palomar College now, making lunches for them—the vets there that are going to school. I love it. I just love talking to them. I love feeding them. And they appreciate my food when I bring it. So—and that's what I look forward to now is doing that.
01:07:40BEYER: What do you wish more people understood about veterans?
01:07:45BURKE: That we're all good people, just like they are in the civilian life. They do a lot for our country. And believe me, I know. I've been there, and you don't know what we sacrifice. I've sacrificed my whole life for the military, and I never got the—(Burke pauses, her eyes tear up)—I never could tell them about it because they thought we didn't know anything. (Burke nods her head.)
01:08:31BEYER: If you were to reflect on the journey of your service, what themes or life lessons emerge?
01:08:41BURKE: Um, well, I think that everybody should know what careers have done in the military for you. The sacrifices that they gave. They should learn about them. And they can if you talk to some of the veterans and not be afraid. And don't demean their service, because I see that a lot. Especially those that have never served—they demean our service to our country, and they forget that we sacrificed. Our service is really a sacrifice for those that have never served.
01:09:45BEYER: So this is the last question.
01:09:47BURKE: Okay.
01:09:48BEYER: How did you become connected to the San Diego County community after your time in service?
01:09:55BURKE: Well, um, I volunteer a lot. I've volunteered in my church, in my community. I go to a lot of organizations. I've given talks. And I think that when you volunteer and go to these organizations, you can learn a lot about volunteering. I just went to one and I realized that I could volunteer in every one of 'em if they needed me (laughs). Now I belong to so many organizations that I don't have enough time of myself to do it. So I volunteered first at the church, and then when I found out I could help the community more by going to the military veteran community, I could do more for the community itself—the non-military community. I could do more for them. And we have. I've done so many things out—just even on Cruisin' Grand (A regular event with classic cars cruising on Grand Avenue in Downtown Escondido). Oh gosh. I talked to the non-military people, and they were—they're surprised! They're surprised with what I've done (laughs). I said—you know, that's one thing I like about volunteering now. You give your own life to the people when you volunteer. And it's good for you too, because you get satisfaction by volunteering.
01:11:54BEYER: Thank you again for sharing your story. It has been my honor to help preserve it.
01:11:59BURKE: Thank you for this interview, because I've given you so much to let you know how I felt, because I want that. I want people to know the feelings that we've had in the military. Many are—you know, I find that a lot of them are afraid to talk to people that aren't in the military, but I think they should know that we are there to be in their community. We like it. We're—actually, you know, most of us in the military are volunteers (laughs). Most of us were volunteers. And we did our service as best as we could. And they—the civilian community—they benefit from it. Because we know what volunteering means (laughs). So they will benefit from the volunteers (laughs).
01:13:24BEYER: Thank you.
01:13:26BURKE: Yes. Well, thank you.
